Sex & Romance
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Hi I'm new here and I need some help don't know what to do anymore I feel absolutely terrible
I have no sex drive. The meer thought of sex bothers me. When I
got pregnant my sex drive went away completely. By the end of my
pregnancy we had sex maybe twice and that was right at the end b/c I
heard that it can help the cervix and I was almost 40 weeks along, plus
I felt terrible for my fiance. It hurt, and I didn't get mine, but I
didn't care. However, now I still don't want to have sex. We haven't
had sex even once since I had DS, whose 4 mnths old next week. What do
I do? I feel terrible, It makes me cry, I try not to let my fiance
see. He always seems to be mentioning something sexual and I just
can't stand it. I think it's going to cause a huge problem. I love
him so much, but just can't bring myself to do anything sexual. I
don't even want to make out. I don't want to french kiss, and he's
hott! He's the best looking man I've ever been with. I think that I look good, I'm in my pre-pregnancy clothes and everything. I just don't know. It's not like
i'm thinking about sex with anyone else...that's not happening. I rave
about him at work. When men hit on me I tell them I have the most
amazing man ever. I'm a bartender and I never see a man that looks
as good as mine. It makes me smile, but I still don't want to have
sex. Now i've never been a romantic person, infact romance has always
kind of made me uncomfortable. DF has tried romance, he likes it, I
tell him thanks for the sweet stuff and all but it doesn't get me in
the mood. It's actually made me nauseas before, weird huh? I'm on
ortho-tri-cyclen and I've been on it before. BC has normally never had
an effect on me. I don't know who to talk to. No one I know has this
problem. I can't take it. I'm sorry this was so long, but I don't
have anyone else to tell....I've been keeping this pent up for awhile
hoping it would go away.
Re: Hi I'm new here and I need some help don't know what to do anymore I feel absolutely terrible
A trip to your gyn is in order. Your hormones are all whacky because of your pregnancy.
Please tell him how you're feeling.
The BCP is probably adding more wood to the fire. Have you guys considered condoms or some other barrier method, like a diaphragm?
This is fixable. GL.:)
That's an option, too -- either you get a tubal ligation or he gets snipped.
Or you can use a condom and a diaphragm both together.
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You just had a baby. Your hormones are all out of whack and your adding more hormones into the mix with your BCP. No wonder you feel crazy. Most women do after having a baby.
You need to visit with your doctor and have this chat with him. He will be able to give you advice, much better than anyone on this board can.
If you are positively sure you and your FI don't want anymore children, than one or both of you need to get fixed.
This.
Good luck!