Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
F/U re: My family drama*
Friday afternoon I came across some recent pictures on facebook of my sisters with my dad, and the other woman. I know they are recent because the title of the album was dated April 24, 2010! I sent a text message to my youngest sister asking why she was with the "hooker." For some odd reason maybe later in the afternoon, I get a response from my father about the "hooker." I slowly realized that my sister must have told him about the text, and that she had been lying to me about hating her and him. I tried to call my sister to see what she would tell me, but she never picked up her phone.
For some reason I decided to call my mom, I had to speak to someone about it. She knew the entire time that my sisters and dad have been hanging out. She didn't know how to tell me or want me to know because she knew I would be upset. She told me that I was the only one on her side, and that she's moved on from the divorce. She doesn't want to think about it, and yes it hurts, but what can we do. My sister continues to lie about the situation to her, and it hurts her...but my mom is stuck with her. I just cried and cried the entire time...how come I'm the only one that thinks cheating is bad?
Here are some of the text messages that I got, I did not respond to any of them. He does not warrant a response for me, and I don't want to reply or give him the satisfaction of my worry for him. I rather just keep him the dark and ignore him like nothing happened.
1. You're so quick to call her a hooker. You don't know anything about her. Do you at least a moment wonder why your sisters can talk to her? **Geesh, maybe because she is almost my age - she could be a big sister to them.* This woman is one year younger than me. Gross...Also, because I swear she is a golddigger.**
2. If you are so good, try living with your mom. **He's coming from the crazy side here, can't blame his mishaps of their marriage on my mom. Low-blow.**
3. I'm dying and have a brain tumor, and don't have much time left. **When did your migraines become a tumor? Lies, and my mom has confirmed this. I literally laughed this when I got this text*
4. That she left him, and that they are no longer together. *Obviously, this is another lie because I saw the recent pictures.*
You have to understand that all through my life, I've been harped on the most because I'm the oldest of the girls- I had it the hardest out of all my sisters. I've worked hard on everything that I ever wanted in life, done it my way, paid my way through college, paid for my wedding, paid for my house, paid for my car without any help from my parents. My sisters on the other hand...I can't say the same for any of them. They still continue to weasel money where they can, get my father to pay for their expenses, they go where the money is at...a bunch of golddiggers. I have a bunch of golddiggers for sisters.
I really thought my youngest sister and I were good and on the same side. That she knew better and had learned from all her problems, but she hasn't changed one bit. But all along she was two-facing me...it's like uncovering the biggest deception since she lied about being pregnant. I don't know what will happen between us, but I have to see her tomorrow while I'm in town for the dentist.
Sorry if that got long, but that's the gist of it.
P.S. Becky you did help me on Friday and you didn't know it. All the while you were texting me - this was all going on in the background, and you had cheered me up. I couldn't tell you what was going on just yet, but you made me laugh. Thanks girl.
Re: F/U re: My family drama*
OMG.. She's a year YOUNGER than you? That's disgusting, imo. If my father did that I would die. I'm sorry you had to deal with the other crap he said and that it seems your sister is lying to you. I really wish I had something better to say. Just want you to know that, like the other girls, I'm here to listen if you need it!
Thanks Alicia, this means alot. The troubles that I've had with my sisters and dad is not worth the heartache, or troubles to me. They've made their decision and path, and so have I. I've already come to the conclusion that they won't listen to me anymore, it doesn't matter what I say or do. They have to learn for themselves, I'm tired of getting picked on, being lied, and all the bull$hit.
My wonderful husband, strong-willed mom, awesome friends & girlfriends here are my biggest resource for my new-age family, and that's all that matters to me. ;-)
I am soooooo very sorry!!!!! I was thinking as I read through all that when did this happen because I was talking to you on Friday.
I am here for you if you need to vent. I am coming to visit soon and you can cry on my shoulder.
I completely agree with you that cheating is wrong!!!!! I am so sorry your sisters have hurt you!
~~~MARRIED BIO~~~
oh Krystal, i'm so sorry you are going through this. i had a similar situation, my dad's girlfriend was 27 (i was 32 at the time...) and it was awful. my mom didn't want me to have a relationship with my dad, but since he was a good dad to me the 32 years prior to him losing his mind, i couldn't just shut him out totally. thank god i didn't, since they are remarried now.
hopefully you can talk to your sister and see why she felt she had to lie to you. also, remember, just because she decides not to cut your dad off totally doesn't necessarily mean she is choosing his side, but it could.
divorcing parents is never easy, no matter what our age, i understand, and neither parent was able to help very much. but my brothers and TJ (my boyfriend/fiance at the time) was crucial. you and your sisters can only really know what you are going through and i think your each others best support.
i hope you are able to talk to your sister and fix your relationship.
i'm praying for you!!
Thanks everyone for your support on this.
Jen - Thanks for your thoughtful words of encouragement, it really does mean alot to me. I didn't see my sister yesterday while I was in town, but she was at work. I had a good day with my mom yesterday, and I really feel bad for my mom. My mom did have the twins with her, my sisters kids...it's interesting how much 3 year olds can talk, and they don't lie! Little kids always tell the truth.
My mom has said that she's tired of saying something to my sister about the situation, that my sister has already made up her mind on something. There's no point on making it worse. I agree, but I'm still wondering why my sister continues to say lies to the both of us. It was interesting to find on certain situations that my sister told me and my mom two complete different stories.
I'm hosting Mother's day at my house this year again, and it will be interesting to see how things come into play. I'm not one to hold things in and let it sit. I hate the lying that's happened, and betrayed by her. I'm not a doormat. We'll talk about everything that's happened soon enough, but I do know that its going to take a lot for her to earn my trust again. That's all I got figured out right now.