Sex & Romance
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Strip Club Question

I used to be a very outgoing girl when I was younger and have told DH stories of how I used to be attracted to girls and even have had a few curious encounters.

 DH and some of his firends went to a strip club the other week and I have been feeling neglected and unwanted ever since. Before everyone replies that I am insecure, I know it. I have gained some weight that I cannot seem to lose since it is due to medication. DH insists that I am still sexy and that the club was "harmless fun". Now DH wants me to come along with him based upon my prior stories and outgoing nature. I am not comfortable going and have told DH and he doesn't want to force me to do anything I do not want to do, but then I feel like I am no fun.

 Any advice to put me at ease?

Re: Strip Club Question

  • You have a right not to do anything you don't want to do.
  • you'd probably have fun, let lose and have some Beer just go ;)
  • If you feel uncomfortable with the idea, don't go. Especially if you would be going with DH AND his friends. It would be harder to decide to leave if your DH's friends were there.
    Hope is the thing with feathers That perches in the soul and sings the tune without the words and never stops--at all -Dickinson Anniversary
  • you know...in my personal experience if there was something i didnt want to do or felt uncomfortable doing it but my SO really wanted me to go, i would compromise and go and see how it went. usually id end up having a great time but in the slight chance that i didnt he understood that i tried for him and understood when i didnt want to do it again. my advice is to try it out....who knows how it'll go......i mean, when men go to strip clubs they can get turned on and then it turns out beneficial for you Wink
  • Years ago, I went with my ex-bf and some other people to a strip club for a bachelor party.  It was a lot of fun.  

    Something happened on that trip that might give you some thoughts.  While we were there, I was approached by a guy who asked me to give his friend a lap dance.  I was stunned and averred, stating that there were lots of beautiful women there who would be happy to give his friend a lap dance.  He said "But you are more sexy than they are because you are a real woman."  I laughed and said "But they are lovely and *naked*."  He responded with "But you are more attractive because you have all your clothes on."  I declined.

    Cracked me up...guys to a club to see nekkid women and were more turned on by the chick who is dressed.  Men are weird creatures!

  • imageDaringMiss:

    Years ago, I went with my ex-bf and some other people to a strip club for a bachelor party.  It was a lot of fun.  

    Something happened on that trip that might give you some thoughts.  While we were there, I was approached by a guy who asked me to give his friend a lap dance.  I was stunned and averred, stating that there were lots of beautiful women there who would be happy to give his friend a lap dance.  He said "But you are more sexy than they are because you are a real woman."  I laughed and said "But they are lovely and *naked*."  He responded with "But you are more attractive because you have all your clothes on."  I declined.

    Cracked me up...guys to a club to see nekkid women and were more turned on by the chick who is dressed.  Men are weird creatures!

    LOL...that is hilarious! but didnt it make you feel good?!?!?! i wouldve cracked up and felt incredible inside and thought, just like you said, men are weird creatures

  • imageswtangelastar:
    imageDaringMiss:

    Years ago, I went with my ex-bf and some other people to a strip club for a bachelor party.  It was a lot of fun.  

    Something happened on that trip that might give you some thoughts.  While we were there, I was approached by a guy who asked me to give his friend a lap dance.  I was stunned and averred, stating that there were lots of beautiful women there who would be happy to give his friend a lap dance.  He said "But you are more sexy than they are because you are a real woman."  I laughed and said "But they are lovely and *naked*."  He responded with "But you are more attractive because you have all your clothes on."  I declined.

    Cracked me up...guys to a club to see nekkid women and were more turned on by the chick who is dressed.  Men are weird creatures!

    LOL...that is hilarious! but didnt it make you feel good?!?!?! i wouldve cracked up and felt incredible inside and thought, just like you said, men are weird creatures

    thats really cool actually! lol..i'd be so flattered =)

    guys go to strip clubs but then talk sh!t about the strippers. the strippers dont even really care about the men, they care about taking their money! they dont want your husband, b/f, FI, they are working to make a buck.

  • I'd go but tell your H that the deal is if you're uncomfortable, you leave right away. Then kick back a drink before you go.

    I went to a strip club once to learn how to give a striptease. Best sex ever afterward Wink

  • imagemarloney77:

    I'd go but tell your H that the deal is if you're uncomfortable, you leave right away. Then kick back a drink before you go.

    I went to a strip club once to learn how to give a striptease. Best sex ever afterward Wink

    It does sound like a fabulous opportunity for some really great sex, but if you are not comfortable, no one will be having any fun.  You might consider going with an "opt-out any time" clause that lets you bail even if it is during the pre-drinking session before hand. On the other hand, if you really don't want to go, don't; just don't bring him down because you think it has something to do with whether or not he finds you attractive.  Strip clubs are not about not finding YOU attractive.  If he says he thinks you are sexy, then he does.  You have to trust him.  What other choice do you have?

  • If you don't want to go... Then don't.
  • Well tell him how you feel.Maybe one night try going i think there fun but don't do anything you don't want to do.My guy likes to go with his friends to strip joints but i look at it like me and my friends going shopping or to get are nails done thats there guy time and if he is inviting you then he must not be doing anything wrong
  • This is my personal opinion, but I think that anytime sexuality . . . . even superficial sensuality . . . . involves the exchange of currency (a category in which strip most certainly fall), then someone is being exploited. I'm personally not a person who embraces an abundance of sexual taboos. Emotionally and physically responsible polyamory (an admittedly complicated notion), homosexuality, group experimentation. . . . all exciting ideas to me. Strip clubs? I don't know. That seems like there are other ethical issues that might be involved. Don't take it from me. Bottom line, if it makes you feel uncomfortable it should make him feel uncomfortable.
  • Give it a try... my H tried for a year to get me to go to one.... I never wanted to, being insecure myself... but like yourself, having an attraction towards females, I have to admit it piqued my interest. Finally, last year while we were on a vacation in Vegas, Him, a few of his friends, and I went to a strip club. I've never had more fun. The strippers pay WAYYY more attention to females than males. It was a great experience and I would love to go back! Just make sure to set any ground rules about anything that worries you before leaving the house.
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