April 2008 Weddings
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
**Stellar** (s/o from baby #2 post)
Tell me your thoughts on why you think Loela may be the only kid you have...DH and I keep saying we really only want to have one, but our baby won't have very many cousin's around. We have some family with LO's who live about an hour and a half away that we see every few months. I don't know when my brother will have children and even if he does, he lives 6 hours away. I have a nephew who is 17 who is my sister's only child. My BIL and SIL will probably never have children. So I don't know if I feel comfortable leaving my kid all alone in the world when we are gone and if our kid decides to move far away, not having them around when they are an adult would suck. (I know I waaay overthink things). The thing is, I just can't imagine having a second child. Hopefully it will change after I have this one, but I've been thinking a lot about when we will try for #2 and I'm just not excited about it, nor can I see myself with two children. When I see parents in the store with two, three, four children, I find myself cringing. I'm just curious your point of view on this (and anyone else who thinks they may only have one child or any other advice).
Re: **Stellar** (s/o from baby #2 post)
BIP
As an only child I would beg you not to do that to your kid! I def don't want to do it to mine, it can be very lonely....it was cool when I was a kid bc christmases and birthdays were great but now...not so much! I had two cousins around my age and I didn't see them much. Now when something happens to my parents I won't have anyone who knows exactly what Im going thru. This is the reason that I wanted to marry into a big family
Alicia- we have talked about this too- about the life of a singleton, etc. I was an only child for 9+ years (no local cousins) and the only thing that got me through was going to a DCP who had 7 children of her own. It was tough, but on the flip side- I was a very mature kid! I read at about two years old, could hold adult conversations very young...but of course, I was lonely a LOT.
The freedom of having one child has an allure to me. The thought of being able to provide more opportunities to one, etc. I have always noticed the only children in my classes, and taken note of the good aspects and bad. Some of these children are very well traveled and mature for their age, have no issues with spending time amongst adults. Of course, some are very spoiled and have trouble with group activities, don't share well and always interrupt.
But this could all be dependent on how they are raised, too- one of my most polite, well-mannered boys has six siblings! Definitely think about what is best for your family. You have plenty of time to decide whether you want more than one.
~~~MARRIED BIO~~~
BIP
I am an only child but wasn't raised to be spoiled. I ad t work for things. I really enjoyed being an only child. My parents always let me bring a freind on vacations so I never felt lonely. I sometimes wonder what is going to happen once my parents are older and I am the only to take care of them but I know that Dave will help me make all the big decisions. As far as I am concerned we are planing on having 2 kids.
Im butting in too. The only reason Chase will not be an only child is because Chris does not have any biological children. I like the freedom and flexiblity of having 1 child. I like how independant he is. Chase has a few cousins close to his age that he plays with all the time. He has kids in the neighborhood that he plays with every day. He is also very content to hang out with the adults all the time. He honestly would prefer it.
I made the decision to have my son after getting pregnant at 18. Abortion and adoption were not an option. Ever. But to say that I want to actually go through the sleepless nights, diapers, and baby stages again would be a lie.
But, It will happen and I am prepared for it. The only reason I am willing to do it again is because I had an amazing pregnancy and delivery the first time around (i know I may not get as lucky the second time). I also know that I have a huge support system in my husband and my family.
I'm going to BIP too because it seems to be the theme.
I grew up with 1 brother and it was great. I always had a friend and a playmate. Yeah we had our fights, but we always had a friend in each other. Someone that we knew we could always count on. I wouldn't trade having a sibling for anything and neither DH nor I want just one child. I will always have a best friend in my brother and a relationship that I would never be able to recreate. Same goes for DH and his sister.
I actually think that DH and I are going to go for 3. Only time will tell. And, right now, with my brother in prison I very much wish my parents had gone for 3 so that I'd have another sibling to go through this with. I feel like an only child right now because he's gone and it's very lonely sometimes and it's hard when I need him and he can't be there. I'm really glad I didn't grow up like that.