June 2009 Weddings
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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WR Poll: One Year Later...
Since our first anniversaries are almost upon us, I thought I'd wake up the board with a reflective poll:
What is your favorite memory of that day?
What thing did you stress over the most that seems insignificant now?
What (if anything) would you change?
What advice would you give brides-to-be?
Re: WR Poll: One Year Later...
Lucy Elizabeth 10.27.12
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What is your favorite memory of that day?
For H & I, it would be the look in his eyes as were were up doing our vows. LOVED how lovingly he looked at me. For humor it was us talking under our breath about logistics for the reception while we did the sand ceremony. The wedding party could hear us and were dying laughing as they all know we are planners. Sentimentally, there were people there who are no longer alive or aren't expected to make it through the year. Having them there, and having them say some incredibly sweet things to us was so touching.
What thing did you stress over the most that seems insignificant now?
There wasn't one thing that jumps out at me, just the overall stress level. I was a giant ball of stress the two weeks before. Thankfully I did get to a point where I stopped stressing and just enjoyed it though.
What (if anything) would you change?
We'd probably spend less. We dug ourselves a hole financially when some promised fundage fell through. Other than that the day was great.
What advice would you give brides-to-be?
Take a deep breath and take it all in, its the fastest day of your life.
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What is your favorite memory of that day? A few-seeing DH and his reaction to seeing me as I walked up the aisle, a quiet moment together after the ceremony, seeing our venue set up before everyone came in, our first dance
What thing did you stress over the most that seems insignificant now? Probably all the tiny details that no one cared about but at the time I did.
What (if anything) would you change? Visit with people more and get more pictures of us in the photo booth (we only have 1 strip).
What advice would you give brides-to-be? See # 2 above, relax, take a deep breath and soak it all in. It really does fly by!
What is your favorite memory of that day? A few-seeing DH and his reaction to seeing me as I walked up the aisle, a quiet moment together after the ceremony, seeing our venue set up before everyone came in, our first dance
What thing did you stress over the most that seems insignificant now? Probably all the tiny details that no one cared about but at the time I did.
What (if anything) would you change? Visit with people more and get more pictures of us in the photo booth (we only have 1 strip).
What advice would you give brides-to-be? See # 2 above, relax, take a deep breath and soak it all in. It really does fly by!
What is your favorite memory of that day?
I have so many. Sentimental: Walking down the aisle towards DH and seeing all the people I love sharing the moment with me. Funny: My sister's amazing toast. Unexpected: One of my friends skinny dipping in the lake at the end of the night.
What thing did you stress over the most that seems insignificant now?
There wasn't really a detail that I got crazy over, I got really stressed the day before because people kept asking me my opinion. I wish I had taken a deep breath and just told them what color to paint their nails instead of acting annoyed that they bothered to ask me. They were trying to be good bridesmaids.
What (if anything) would you change?
I told the photographer not to do posed pictures because I don't really like them, but I wasn't thinking about the fact that OTHER people like them. MIL is still upset that we don't have a more posed picture of DH and I for her wall (she wants one of us standing straight looking at the camera and we don't have anything like that). It seems silly but I should have thought about what other people would want as well.
What advice would you give brides-to-be?
Have fun. The wedding is a day, the marriage is a lifetime (hopefulyl!!!). Don't worry about the small things and have a great time.
Hello there fellow J09ers! Long time no see. I've just been lurking randomly, so I haven't been keeping up on everyone too much. Happy Anniversary month to us all!
What is your favorite memory of that day?
The entire day!!! The funniest and most memorable part was the Best man forgetting DH's ring during the ceremony. I just remember having this feeling of relief and happiness right after the ceremony, like "it's finally done!"
What thing did you stress over the most that seems insignificant now?
I remember being almost in tears when when of our toasting flutes got broken, seems silly now because all they do is sit in our china cabinet.
What (if anything) would you change?
It was a wonderful day. But if I could go back now, I'd eliminate a lot of time that it took for pictures. Pictures seemed to drag on forever after our ceremony. Partly because the photographer was having technical issues and partly because we have big families. By the time we got finished with them and into our reception people were already leaving, and that bummed us out.
What advice would you give brides-to-be?
Just try not to worry about the small details too much. No one is going to notice if all of the ribbons are exactly the same color, or whatever minor detail you're stressing about!
What is your favorite memory of that day? I still love everything about my day. My MOST favorite would be walking down the aisle
What thing did you stress over the most that seems insignificant now? oh my! everything! Making my bmaids my bmaids.
What (if anything) would you change? I would have given more attention to my mom, would have only had my sister in my wp
What advice would you give brides-to-be? you WILL NOT make everyone happy no matter how hard you try and FAMILY is always most important.
What is your favorite memory of that day? Collapsing in the limo at the end of the night. We both just leaned back, held hands, sighed, and smiled at each other. Then we started talking about all our other favorite memories of the day. It's weird that my favorite moment (now) is one from when it was technically over, but it was the first moment of calm/peace we had with one another alone.
What thing did you stress over the most that seems insignificant now? The seating charts/guests. I barely talked to anyone and I didn't spend nearly enough time at any of the tables, so if there was drama, there was no way for me to ever know about it.
What (if anything) would you change? Not much. I think I would have thought a little bit more about where in the gardens we took photographs. There was one spot we really, really, really wanted to get a picture, and we never made it down there. I'm still bummed I'm missing that.
What advice would you give brides-to-be? Whenever anyone tells you, "the wedding doesn't matter, the marriage does," ignore them. Marriage, of course, is the most important thing. But if the wedding didn't matter, you wouldn't be having one. You'd be at the courthouse and it'd be done and over with. You chose to throw this party, you chose to invite all these people, you chose to spend this money -- make it fabulous. Make it everything you want it to be. And have a blast.
What is your favorite memory of that day? Our first meeting
What thing did you stress over the most that seems insignificant now? Decorations
What (if anything) would you change? Invited more people.
What advice would you give brides-to-be? Have fun and don't forget the reason you're getting married!
What thing did you stress over the most that seems insignificant now? The centerpieces. We did a lot of going back and forth on whether the pots for the plants would be white or blue. OMG who CARES???
What (if anything) would you change? Keep the flowers down when you're walking down the aisle! In every picture I'm holding them up near my shoulder like they're going to protect me.
Also, I wish I would have stood up for myself more during the whole planning process. I was so worried about everyone else being happy and satisfied and coming off as a totally chill bride that I really put up with a lot of crap that I should not have had to deal with. I hired these vendors, they need to work for me. (I ordered vegan food, they should have brought it. I needed friends and parents with me in the bridal suite when I was getting ready, but a few resisted coming, for one reason or another. I asked the photographer for specific pictures she did not take. The videographer got lost and was late and missed some important stuff I should have insisted he get--even if it meant delaying the ceremony a bit).
I also would have invited more people--the guest list was so long but only a third of people invited ended up actually coming. I wish we'd invited the 20 or so people we were on the fence about, if for no other reason than to make them feel included.
Also, I would have emailed the days' schedules to people helping out ahead of time! I can't believe I didn't think of it. I just assumed I would hand out these binders I had made to my helpers when they got there, but because they didn't have the schedules ahead of time they didn't know when to get there (duh!).
What advice would you give brides-to-be? Make it exactly what you want. Invite whomever you want, do whatever you want. I was so worried about making other people happy, I think I got a little bit lost in it all.
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What is your favorite memory of that day? Seeing my parents before the ceremony, dancing with my husband
What thing did you stress over the most that seems insignificant now? The guest list/seating chart. I'm not sure how many no shows/extras we had, but these two things did happen: 1 friend called me at the hotel the night before to ask if she could bring her daughters (4 and 7yrs old) instead of her husband (they were the only kids there), 1 couple ran into us as we were coming back in from taking pics after the ceremony and admitted that they were not taking a bathroom break from the cocktails... they were in fact just arriving. (apparently the wife's flight was late and they came straight from the airport, but missed the ceremony, which, in retrospect, was actually kind of sweet of them). Ultimately there was a crowd when I walked down the aisle, and there was enough food for everybody, so it's all good.
What (if anything) would you change? The centerpieces. They were fugly.
and this:
"Also, I would have emailed the days' schedules to people helping out ahead of time! I can't believe I didn't think of it. I just assumed I would hand out these binders I had made to my helpers when they got there, but because they didn't have the schedules ahead of time they didn't know when to get there (duh!)."
I didn't have the binders, but I did make a very elaborate schedule for everyone and then emailed it to No One.
What advice would you give brides-to-be? Take care of yourself. DH got the flu, and we didn't know if was the swine variety until the night before the rehearsal. I had pink eye up to and including the rehearsal dinner. Not fun.
What is your favorite memory of that day?
I really loved our ketubah signing. It was so personal and sweet and special to have just the people we loved with us.
What thing did you stress over the most that seems insignificant now?
The centerpiece for the placecard table. It took weeks to make and was expensive and not really worth it. It looks nice in the living room now, but wasn't necessary to have for the wedding.
What (if anything) would you change?
Overall, my wedding was a great day at the time it happened. I wish I'd gotten the pictures by the waterfall I really wanted, but the photographer didn't seem to have enough time to get us over there, even though the bridal party had been waiting there for us. I'm still sad I don't have those pictures of us. I wish I'd been able to pick my own videographer instead of being pressured to use a family friend. We have no recording of the toasts, half the ceremony looks like my Dad and my husband's mother are getting married because of the angle of the shots, and it's just bad. I would have also waited to ask my bridesmaids and picked differently. Oh, and I wish I'd stored my bouquet properly so I still had it, and I wish I'd remembered to take it off the table after the ceremony so I could have pictures walking back down the aisle with it.
Gosh... I hope I don't sound bitter! LOL
What advice would you give brides-to-be?
No matter what, don't panic when things aren't perfect. I also think everyone should find space in their budget for a coordinator. My coordinator saved the day so many times (fixing the ribbon on my bouquet) and put in special touches I wouldn't have thought of (giving us toasting glasses for after the cake cutting).Since our first anniversaries are almost upon us, I thought I'd wake up the board with a reflective poll:
What is your favorite memory of that day? Honestly... I can't really narrow it down. But I think I'm going to have to pick the couple of minutes RIGHT after the ceremony where the whole BP and our parents and we were all down by the pool and EVERYONE was crying. lol. I loved it. We didn't cry during the ceremony, but we let it out right after.
What thing did you stress over the most that seems insignificant now? If my vendors were even going to show up. lol. I think I confirmed and re-confirmed when they were to arrive like five times.
What (if anything) would you change?
1) If I had control over it....It was extremely hot out (95 degrees), so I was uncomfortable in my dress. I would have had it be around 80* with no wind, that would be perfect lol.
2) The "best man" made the most ridiculous speech and was swearing like crazy. I would have had one of the other groomsmen step in I think. Oh my god was I pissed off. Good thing we didn't have kids at dinner time.
3) The timing of speeches and dinner. For whatever reason, the DJ started speeches before dinner was served. Couldn't figure that one out...
Other than that, it was a perfect day and I couldn't complain!
What advice would you give brides-to-be? Have fun planning your wedding! It's supposed to be!
Try not to stress about small details. Pay attention to the music and the food. That's what people remember, in my opinion. 
:::In My Life, I've Loved You More:::
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Since our first anniversaries are almost upon us, I thought I'd wake up the board with a reflective poll:
What is your favorite memory of that day?
1)After the girls finished lacing me up, they held up a floor-length mirror, and all of a sudden I was like "OMG, I am a BRIDE and I look gorgeous".
2) Walking down the aisle and seeing DH crying up front. Holy cow.
3) Having all 4 of my grandparents there; my grandma passed away in February and I am so happy and honored that she was alive and vibrant at my wedding.
What thing did you stress over the most that seems insignificant now? I did not stress out about much. I loved wedding planning and love the way things turned out. My biggest stress point was probably invitations (I was obsessed) but I wouldn't do them any different.
What (if anything) would you change?
Hired a different DOC. Ours kind of sucked which was a headache for my mom (I didn't notice!)
What advice would you give brides-to-be? Have fun planning your wedding! Focus on the things that are important to you and ignore the things that aren't.