Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Drugs...let's chat
I have never done drugs, ever. Never ever. My friends all did various types of drugs, I never did it. I never wanted to. I am really proud of that fact. Sooooo, turns out my idiot cuzin, who everyone but me always seemed to think was this charming free spirit (he's now 22 years old) was recently arrested and charged with a number of serious drug offenses. In short, he was busted selling cocaine! It has been common knowledge for several years that he did drugs and was, at the very least, dealing in pot.
Anyhoodles, it seems that the fam is now divided up into a couple of camps. One seems to think that he is a victim of circumstance, completely gloss over the fact that he dealt to an undercover cop, and are screaming entrapment. The other, seems to be the "he's a good kid" camp and feel that, while he made a serious error in judgement, should be let off with a slap on the wrist. Me? I believe that drug peddlers are the lowest form of scum. My sympathy is reserved for the parents of the kids he sold drugs to and for his siblings who have to deal with the embarassment, and for his niece who will know he uncle is a friggin' criminal. I believe he belongs in jail, period.
I've had some really interesting and enlightening convos with folks about it...wondering what your thoughts are. Parents: if you did partake (now or in the past) does it affect the way you think about drugs when it comes to your kids?
Re: Drugs...let's chat
While my older brother claims to have done some more serious drugs, most people in my family have smoked pot at one time or another. I have never willingly done drugs, of any kind, this includes smoking cigarettes. I have been hot boxed by some idiot friends who thought it would be funny. I was p!ssed. That being said, I think like this, Pot is better for you than drinking, drinking is legal pot is not. Pot should be. I live in an area that is actually becoming pretty known for it's quality of pot and if you live on any kind of acreage you will find it growing in your yard, somewhere, wild. Very rarely does anyone get arrested for having pot. It's kind of hard to arrest someone for posession if the plant is growing in the backyard and you have no idea it's there.
Other drugs p!ss me off. If you get caught selling them you should go to jail. If someone dies because they OD'd on something you sold them, you should be held responsible.
I tried weed once while in college and thankfully didn't like it. Its not something I am proud of and I wish I hadn't
I think people who deal drugs are making a stupid choice. Its not worth ruining your life over, although it does make good money. I think that the only way to stop drug use is tougher jail terms, but that will never happen.
I have dabbled in the past, even the recent, before PG, past. But there is a BIG difference between smoking a joint every now and then and dealing cocaine.
I'm sure there are lots of dealers that have fantastic personalities. It doesn't mean that what they are doing is okay. Drug trafficking is a scary business and I am sure it can be quite the slippery slope into other criminal activities.
When it comes to my child, I won't condone smoking pot but if he does it I won't fall apart (I hope). I will talk to him about its effects on the developing brain and hope that if he does partake that it is not until after he is 18 or so. Harder drugs scare me and I will educate and inform him about these as well. I hope, for him, that he is confindent enough to make good choices about the friends he hangs out with and the situations he is in so that he doesn't feel too pressured to try them out.
I am a big believer that pot is/can be a gateway drug. DH strongly disagrees. I am not saying that in every case the user will progress to harder drugs, but in alot of cases the "gateway" is more about the people you end up associating with than the drug itself. That was certainly true for several friends who have been through recovery.
I know that zero tolerance policies when it comes to parenting aren't necessarily realistic, but that would certainly be my position if I was a parent. No way, no how would it be ok...regardless of the drug. I saw my parents make allowances for my sibling and it simply gave them the green light to continue doing it. My nephew is 13 and we've had lots of talks about drugs and alcohol. He says he will never try them, and I believe him. He's that kind of kid. He's got super strong convictions, and a good head on his shoulders. Now...if his younger bro told me the same thing I'd know he was full of it! lol As my sis has said, "Ash I don't worry about, I know he won't do drugs. Andrew He'd be the one selling it!" lmao
We certainly plan to educate our boys on the effects of drugs and hope that they stay away from them all period.
At the same time, I am not that naive mother who says my kid would never do drugs. Kids do stuff all the time without their parents knowing. And if my kids ever get arrested for dealing, I will certainly stand by them and support them, but they will know that I don't support their choices.
Good lord.... I have no idea how I'd handle the drug thing as a parent. I hope that I wouldn't be a complete hypocrit and wouldn't freak out over a little pot at an appropriate age. IHO recent privacy discussions, I don't want to air out DH's dirty laundry, but I can say that we've both had different levels of experiences with drugs, so I'm guessing our opinions might differ slightly in the parenting category.
I've done pot and hash, but nothing harder than that. But I did have brief spell years ago where I did partake on a consistent basis. However, a number of years ago (over 10) I chose to stay away from the stuff. It just doesn't interest me anymore.
As for how to treat dealers etc... I wouldn't want to pass judgement unless I knew all the facts. I think punishment etc should fit the person and the crime. i.e. if he was high and was just trying to sell the last of his personal stash to have some money... not a malicious dealer, just someone who needs some rehad.
This is topic that can get me pretty heated. I agree with you Mel when you say the hardcore dealers are the bottom of the barrell scum. Drugs ruin so many peoples lives. Not just the people who become addicts but the those people loved ones who have to watch their family members life go down the drain.
I did smoke weed a couple times when I was younger. To me though I would of never allowed it to be a gateway drug as I was terrified of the other harder stuff. I am really on the fence in regards to weed though. To me, it doesn't make sense that weed is illegal and alcohol is legal but I can understand the agrument of it being a gateway drug as well. For me it never could of led to anything harder like coke, but I can see how it might for others.