Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Now I don't feel like it.....
So I posted on here awhile ago about the lack of sex in my marriage.
Update: So H is now off the zoloft and for the past 2 weeks has been much more affectionate and wanting in the bedroom. Which is really good, right?
So now here is the big but; I now have completely shut down sexually. I just don't have any desire to have sex with him. We have had sex 2 twice in the last 2 weeks and both times I was tense, felt weird, and dirty (not in a sexy way), not to mention it hurting. I don't know how to describe this feeling. I mean, I actually now think sex is kinda gross. I just freeze up and freak out. This is really odd for me. I used to be really into sex. I LOVED sex! Now it creeps me out. I am having sex with my H now and that is what I wanted I thought...... I am seriously messed up. I feel like he is having sex with me, but I have checked out. We have been to counseling. I am so confused. He is holding up his end of the bargain, by doing something about our no sex life, But now I feel like sex is gross, and yucky.
So I want to want to have sex with H. I don't want a divorce. Suggestions?
Re: Now I don't feel like it.....
Continue on w/ counseling...and why precisely do you find it "gross, and yucky" ?
To me I just feel dirty. I don't know how to describe it. I didn't always feel this way. That is what is concerning me. I don't know if it is because I am so out of practice or what. But it's almost like this squeemish feeling. Like shuddering, wanting to get away. Like a huge "EWE" feeling all over.
Sara, Friend?
glove slap. I don't take crap.
Well, is it the sex you wanted or the connection? Are you getting sex w/out the emotional connection maybe? Sounds a bit strange, but it could be possible that you just aren't feeling the emotional connection you're looking for...
I do have that in my past. I don't really remember it much ( I was really little) ...... but I am not sure if that is related to my situation. As I didn't use to think sex was gross. I was not a virgin when I was married.
When ever my H touches me in an intimate way I just tense up and freak out. I really feel uncomfortable.
Sara, Friend?
glove slap. I don't take crap.
this is defiantly an emotional problem. for what ever reason you feel hurt. ask your dh to do something special for you..... for me my love language is gifts. ask him to buy you the most sintamental gift he can find get for $8.... or if you want him to do more acts of kindness.... ask him to wash the clothes while you read the latest "Knot" posts.... ; ) any way.... TALK. focus on any think you love BUT sex.... it's a proven fact for my dh and me: you can not Plan sex... if you try to make the perfect place and time and all.... it's always a let down. focus on you and him and the sex will come from love.