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Why do I let my mother get to me?
Excuse the vent....but seriously, WHEN will I stop letting my mother get to me? I will be 37 in less than a month and she STILL has the ability to make me feel like a 12 year old.
We are getting another dog tomorrow - we adopted her from the local SPCA and had to wait for her to get spayed - and I was just not excited to tell my mom because I knew she'd get all judgy on me....and she did. WTF. Granted, I realize I let her make me feel this way, but c'mon lady, can't you be supportive?!? I am an adult, right? Grrrrrrr. I'm so irritated with her right now.
I'm not sure why us adding to our pet brood is so wrong, but she doesn't approve. I'm sure it's because of my evil cat that I'm secretly hoping will die (sorry, that's mean, but it's true....I've mentioned it before), but I've given her the opportunity to allow my cat to retire at her house and she won't do it. Let's hope tomorrow morning I wake up and all of this angst is dissipated. 
Re: Why do I let my mother get to me?
Heh, I'm 29 and my mother still has the ability to make me feel crazy defensive and annoyed.
I think mothers just know exactly how to push our buttons lol! I'm sure they don't (usually) mean to, but it feels that way...
What kind of dog are you getting? I need photos!
Your mom is ALWAYS your mom. I don't think you can get old enough to change that.
The last lecture I got from my mom ended with me saying, "It is not your choice". Although it made her stop carrying on, I still left with the feeling that I did something wrong.
Newlyweds since 2007
We have a cat like this, too. He is over 15 years old and I swear he has outlived his 9 lives. He has sores on his neck from years ago that have never healed and he keeps losing weight, so now he's just bones and fur. My sisters and I have started referring to him as "zombie cat," because he doesn't look like he should be alive. Sometimes I think it would be better for him if he did just die, it would put him out of his misery. The vet doesn't think he's in any pain though, so he keeps hanging on.
As for your mother, it must be tough to have a mom like that. I would ask her that even if she doesn't agree with my decisions to at least respect them and if she can't do that then to keep her mouth shut (maybe say it to a bit more politely though!).
We're getting a little chihuahua mix....but I think whatever is mixed in with her is more dominant. She has VERY long legs (well, for a pint sized dog) and more of a terrier snout. I'll pick her up today and make sure I post some photos. We're so excited to bring her home!
| Olowalu, Maui ~ August 6, 2008 |
| Family of 4 ~ April 2, 2011 |
| Family of 5 - October 24, 2012 |
First off, why am I older than all of you!?!? I don't want to be old
Like pp said, your mom is your mom - always. Aren't mother's the reason many psychologists have jobs??
You aren't THAT much older, crazy girl. And, we are not old.....at least I don't think so.
PS - Seattle is the weekend before my birthday so we can celebrate early.
This. I totally hear you! So many things. I grew up not telling her much b/c she always had a way of turning it around and using it against me. Now that our relationship is better, I can tell her more, but the criticism is still there at times, and it drives me nuts!
This. I totally hear you! So many things. I grew up not telling her much b/c she always had a way of turning it around and using it against me. Now that our relationship is better, I can tell her more, but the criticism is still there at times, and it drives me nuts!
This. I totally hear you! So many things. I grew up not telling her much b/c she always had a way of turning it around and using it against me. Now that our relationship is better, I can tell her more, but the criticism is still there at times, and it drives me nuts!
Moms just have that effect on their kids, even if their kids are grown adults.
I'm sure our kids will be complaining about us in another 20-30 years, lol.
Good for you for adopting! So many animals end up at shelters and not all are lucky to go to loving homes. We volunteer with our humane society and I always want to adopt all the dogs and cats when we go visit!
Same here! I never tell my mom anything, actually I never really did for this very reason. Sadly, my mom and I aren't that close.
| Olowalu, Maui ~ August 6, 2008 |
| Family of 4 ~ April 2, 2011 |
| Family of 5 - October 24, 2012 |
hahahah
my gma is 80+, has cancer in 80% of her body and STILL gets on my mom's case! hahah and my mom is 65+. in fact, my gma gets on all her daughters' case! HAHAHAH my gma was in the hospital since april and even while she has no voice, she manages to get on their last nerves. hahahah
that's how we knew she was feeling better. hahahah
during a job interview, the interviewer asked me, "who's the most difficult person you've had to deal with?" and with a quickness i said, "my mom." everyone in the room laughed. HAHAHAH
i've had many many issues with her and still do, but i've finally worked them out where i just shrug my shoulders and say "whatevs."
sometimes, to shut her up, i'll tell her something like "wow mom. that's a great idea. i'll think about it." and of course i have no intention of listening to what she has to say.
but later when she questions me, i reply "well, i thought about you were saying, and i still think my way." hahahah
she can't say anything after that. i've already taken her opinion into consideration.
OR i'll tell her "that's a great idea. why don't you work out all the details and/or the alternate plan and get back to me."
HAHAHAHAH
when i agree with her, she gets disoriented. HAHAHAH
i love her.
hawaii 10.2008 plan ;P married bio ???
I don't have that problem with my mom ,we get along pretty good.but my MIL is almost 80 and she lives in the basment suite in our house,my hubby helps her out when she needs help ,even though she is very independent.Boy oh boy some days I feel life moving out lol,she has a mind of her own and when she starts my hubby leaves the house angry and leaves me thier with her.Thank you DH. LOL!!!!! If she starts on me because I am one of her kids now,my DH stops her right off the bat because he knows I will get angry and then he will get angry.
I love my MIL to death and most of the time she is great and she helps us as much and we help her,but boy thier are some days!!! If I know she is in one of her moods if I hear her coming up to our place I sneak in my bed and pretend I don't hear her,lol I'm bad arent I!!!