Sex & Romance
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anal?????

Sorry if this is an awkward topic to bring up, and I hope no one's offended by it, but has anyone out there tried anal sex with their partner?  My DH has always wanted to try it and I finally gave in, but it just felt weird to me.  I didn't get any sexual stimulation or arousal out of it (although he loved it of course, haha).  We definitely used lots of lube and took all the basic precautions (starting slow, etc), but is there some trick to enjoying this that I missed?  For those of you who have tried it, is it something you enjoy?  Thanks for any answers!!!

Re: anal?????

  • Something I don't understand is why do most guys seem to really enjoy that and want to do that? I have never understood that!

    Yes, I have tried it and once past the painful part it was just ok for me. I mean, it's not something I want to do all the time and I haven't done it in years but I really don't think there is a trick to enjoy it.

    Maybe guys really like it because of how tight the hole is...maybe I just answered my own question. Some women like the feel of a guy inside them when they're tight because they can feel the guy better.....maybe that's the trick?

  • Women don't have a prostate or nearly the same number of erogenous nerve endings around their anus as they do around the vagina and clitoris.  Anal sex is probably never going to feel as good as vaginal intercourse.

    I have been able to have an orgasm during anal sex with clitoral stimulation.  I think that the taboo nature of the anal sex can be a turn on.  

    But the current obsession in porn with anal sex causes me a bit of dismay.  What other holes are they going to want to f*ck next?  Anyone remember when oral sex and threesomes were "extreme"?

  • imagesetm2323:
    Sorry if this is an awkward topic to bring up, and I hope no one's offended by it, but has anyone out there tried anal sex with their partner? 

    Grow up, it's not awkward to talk about anal with other sexually active people. 

    Yes, I have had anal with my H.  It is not my favorite, but I do it so he can shut up.  You are deffinitely not going to enjoy it if there is no stimulation while doing anal.  Also, you should try some type of lubrication to help with the tightness you feel when he is putting it in. 

  • If done properly with lube, it can be amazing.  If not done properly, it'll hurt like hell.  Astro Glide is hands down the best lube for anal.  You can't just rush it, you need to relax and have some clitoral arousal first.  If you do decide to try, remember to relax and if it hurts, speak up!  :)
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  • imageDaringMiss:

    Women don't have a prostate or nearly the same number of erogenous nerve endings around their anus as they do around the vagina and clitoris.  Anal sex is probably never going to feel as good as vaginal intercourse.

    I have been able to have an orgasm during anal sex with clitoral stimulation.  I think that the taboo nature of the anal sex can be a turn on.  

    But the current obsession in porn with anal sex causes me a bit of dismay.  What other holes are they going to want to f*ck next?  Anyone remember when oral sex and threesomes were "extreme"?

    I totally agree with you about the Porn obsession. I think the other big porn trend is making us Gag during Oral. Stupid! ...next question tho since you mentioned the prostate thing. Has anyone ever had thier DH want you to stimulate thier prostate by tending to him back there?

    Any how I think that if done properly and without being nervous and tense it can be ok especially if you are really giving ur DH pleasure which personally does it for me. Not my fave although we have done it. I find it easier when I am on top because then I can control it a little bit more and he can concentrate on stimulating me cliitoris wise! Not so bad that way I guess. Give it a try...Hope this helped.

     

  • I have tried it a couple of times with DH and it was ok. Usually we do it after I  have had a few drinks and are really into it. lots of lube we use the his and hers the purple and blue bottles I think lifestyle makes it and it really really helps. If you ease into it it can be fun and something DH would enjoy. Thats really the only reason I do it really to make him happy he doesn't force it at all but I like to make him sexually satisfied. Hope this helps : )

  • I hated it the first few times we did it, but i got Astor glide (I think that's what its called). Know I love it. I try to only do it maybe about 3 or 4 times a year. Sometimes it happens more often. My fi was my first for any kind of sexual things you can think of. so I thought it was gross but it turns out to be very fun once you get into it. just have fun and enjoy your self.
  • I actually think anal is very intense and extremely satisfying. Try being on top when you do it. It's much easier to control the angle/speed etc.

     

    To answer a pp, my fiance has no interest at all in anal play for himself. The idea of it weirds him out.

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  • It really isn't so bad!  The main thing is that I have to be really turned on.  Like others have said, make sure it's well lubricated and he starts off slow and gentle.
  • Have you every tried anal ease? I bought it at a local sex store, it makes things a little easier because it actually numbs the area. Use is with lubricant, and maybe it'll be a better experience
  • I made be the oddball here but I actually enjoy anal.  I have to be in the mood and really worked up but if I reach orgasm before my partner I will even ask him if he would like to finish elsewhere and he gets all excited. I am able to come from it also.  I'm not sure if it's just the excitement of something different or knowing the satisfaction he is getting but I find that it does feel good IF done right.  Definately use lube and ease into it.  Start with a finger or small toy and eventually when you are comfortable go for it.  Just relax and focus on the what you are feeling while in the act.  Then you can go back later and do the pro/con thing and decide how you feel about it.  It's not as taboo as people want to make it, saying it's only gay men, BS!  Although I would have to say in a weird way they have the best of both worlds, they can get it and receive it without having to use toys.  LOL

  • My DH has had a lot of rectal/abdominal surgeries and procedures due to Hirschsprung's Disease and the thought of any anal whatsoever grosses him out.

    If you don't like it, don't do it.  I don't think "to shut up my husband" is a good enough excuse to engage in sexual activities you don't enjoy yourself.  

  • imagerochella:


    If you don't like it, don't do it.  I don't think "to shut up my husband" is a good enough excuse to engage in sexual activities you don't enjoy yourself.  

     

      Don't be such a cranky stuckup prude. I wasn't too thrilled initially but it doesn't hurt when I lube up and DH is gentle.

       I kind of like the way I can make DH orgasm on command just by tightening down on his penis.  

  • After years of persuasion, DH and I tried it for the first time and I have never felt so awkward in my entire life. I relaxed, used lots of lube and even "booty ease", a numbing lube from Pure Romance and I don't know how much it helped, but it just felt like a ton of pressure. After a few slow sticks, I was done and so was he.

    One time, DH and I were very drunk and fooling around and I stuck a small dildo up him, and he seemed to enjoy it then yet hasn't wanted to do it since. 

  • I have had anal on several occasions.. though it gets easier, it never becomes pleasurable :o)
  • imagelifeguard:
    imagerochella:


    If you don't like it, don't do it.  I don't think "to shut up my husband" is a good enough excuse to engage in sexual activities you don't enjoy yourself.  

     

      Don't be such a cranky stuckup prude. I wasn't too thrilled initially but it doesn't hurt when I lube up and DH is gentle.

       I kind of like the way I can make DH orgasm on command just by tightening down on his penis.  

     

    That didn'tsound like a cranky prude comment at all to me. In fact YOU are the one who came off cranky there!

  • does no one really enjoy it?!  i always used to say i would never try it because the thought grossed me out, but i have turned over a new leaf (well turned over onto my stomach lol)  the first few times its not fun because its so awkward and painful, but when you keep trying it can be so amazing!  some days i absolutely don't want it and other days i can;t get enough.  go slow, use lube, and get used to being played with back there first.  RELAX!!!  use toys, fingers, oral stimualtion and it will become very pleasurable.  just make sure you get going first before you try or its not as easy to accept.  trust me, you will prolly love it (not at first) it just takes some time and getting used to.  some days you may even prefer anal over vaginal Big Smile

  • imageBigTrev:
    imagelifeguard:
    imagerochella:


    If you don't like it, don't do it.  I don't think "to shut up my husband" is a good enough excuse to engage in sexual activities you don't enjoy yourself.  

     

      Don't be such a cranky stuckup prude. I wasn't too thrilled initially but it doesn't hurt when I lube up and DH is gentle.

       I kind of like the way I can make DH orgasm on command just by tightening down on his penis.  

     

    That didn'tsound like a cranky prude comment at all to me. In fact YOU are the one who came off cranky there!

    This. Wow. 

     

    Anal is a personal preference... either you like it or you don't. If it's something you don't want to do, tell him you weren't into it. I bet that if he knows that he won't be as into it, either. 

    I also never understood the fascination with anal when it comes to straight, married men. I boggles me.  


  • Anal is a personal preference... either you like it or you don't. If it's something you don't want to do, tell him you weren't into it. I bet that if he knows that he won't be as into it, either. 

    I also never understood the fascination with anal when it comes to straight, married men. I boggles me.  

     

    I'm guessing this means your personal preference is "No" on this issue?  Lol. 

     

    I enjoy it, though I never would have thought it possible before DH.  I've asked him why he likes it so much and he said it's a combination of the taboo nature of it, the physical sensation of it, and the fact that  it's a deeply intimate act that requires us to be really connected on a physical and emotional level.

    It's not like we do it every night.  It's a once in a while thing when we're both feeling really dirty.  

  • Most days! lol. It seems after one too many glasses of wine I tend to change my mind. Oops. Embarrassed
  • Well me n DH have tried it three times and each time hurt like hell. Yes you do need alot of lube and relax, but for me I always tense so I dont know how to relax. I do believe it is a guy thing that they wanna try because like everyone said it clearly doesnt get me off any. I told my DH i would try again one day but i dont see why they like it so much.
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  • Thank you all for the great input!  I really appreciate your advice and am kind of looking forward to trying again, haha! 
  • imageGator_Bride08:
    imageBigTrev:
    imagelifeguard:
    imagerochella:


    If you don't like it, don't do it.  I don't think "to shut up my husband" is a good enough excuse to engage in sexual activities you don't enjoy yourself.  

     

      Don't be such a cranky stuckup prude. I wasn't too thrilled initially but it doesn't hurt when I lube up and DH is gentle.

       I kind of like the way I can make DH orgasm on command just by tightening down on his penis.  

     

    That didn'tsound like a cranky prude comment at all to me. In fact YOU are the one who came off cranky there!

    This. Wow. 

     

    Anal is a personal preference... either you like it or you don't. If it's something you don't want to do, tell him you weren't into it. I bet that if he knows that he won't be as into it, either. 

    I also never understood the fascination with anal when it comes to straight, married men. I boggles me.  

     

    LOL, that's funny because my hubby says that if he wanted anal, he would have gone gay.  That's just his thing on it.  It always made me laugh. 

  • It is actually a pretty erogenous (sp?) zone. But for you to orgasm that way you would have to already be very turned on... it isnt the pleasurable unless your very turned on then thats when it feels really good and you can actually orgasm...
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