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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Poll! How long did you wait? (sex)
How long did you wait to have sex?
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Re: Poll! How long did you wait? (sex)
We like to brag that we didn't have sex in the very beginning and that we waited 3 whole weeks.
The reality of it is, we were dating in secret and it took 3 weeks to be alone together
After that the secret was blown; there was no seperating us.
LOL
Why was it secret?
I wish I could add a Part B poll or something. I was talking to a single friend who just started dating a new guy. They are both 29, and she decided to wait to have sex with him. And we were laughing, wondering if its silly to 'wait' when you are older. It seems like such a high school thing to do, like waiting for the Prom or something
ETA: Oh so the Part B would be about age. I wonder if its more common to 'wait' when you are younger. Once you are older, you just want to have sex. Or is it the opposite? Younger couples aren't as in control of their hormones as more mature couples?
Drama? I dunno. We were "frenemies" in high school, hadn't seen each other in almost 2 years, and well ... things went well when we did see each other again. Apparently it was scandolous to a bunch of teenagers/early 20s kids, though
. So we didn't tell anyone we were dating because it was just a hoopla. To this day, I don't get what the big deal was.
For me, I'd say it'd be the opposite. I was, uh ... not so good at waiting. While I was the last one of my friends to start having sex, once I did, well ...
However, if I were in that situation again, I am positive the wait would be much longer. Not necessarily for any particular event or length of time, but just in general - wait until I was comfortable.
::SHUDDER:: The idea of having sex with someone other than my husband totally freaks me out. Yes, of course because I love him so much. Also because good gawd somene else see me naked and all the mess that comes with that? Not to mention the emotional side of it ... NO THANK YOU.
This. I also used to have sex dreams with celebrities (or sometimes people we know). I have them less frequently now, and they are always terrible! I always feel ashamed of my body, my technique/skills (or lack there of), ect.
I think some people wait to have sex until they're in a committed relationship regardless of age/hormones. I would guess it's more common to discuss waiting when you're older (whether you actually wait or not).
I waited about five months to have sex with my XH, and I was 10+ years younger then. It seemed like us having the sex would be a big deal back then (although I was certainly not extra young!). I waited 18 dates to have sex with my current boyfriend, and we specifically discussed a plan of taking things slow.
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I remember one of my married friends saying that it was better to hold out for a bit - make the guy earn it, if you will. I never thought much about it until I met MH, when I sort of tested out this theory. we waited a whopping month. heh.
but he's also not the typical CA douchebag I had met in the past. maybe that has more to do with it than the actual theory.
In my experience (both with myself and friends) the age factor doesn't really play into one's view of sex, however age might affect how much you live up to your own ideals. I've always had what many people would consider to be a conservative view of sex. I was the last of my friends to have it. But even though I never stopped viewing it as I do now and always had, there was a brief period where I didn't uphold my values (sometime between the innocence of youth and the confidence of maturity). I'm happy with how long DH and I waited, but I also wouldn't have minded it being longer.