Caribbean Nesties
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Vibez and preyers

I find that asking for either of these (or toilet paper) is insanely tacky and self-centered.

If someone else posts and says, "Let's send vibez to this other poster" I think that's thoughtful.  Asking for them for you, your husband, or your family irritates the hell out of me.

Actually, IRL it even bothers me when someone asks me to pray for another person.  Not just because I don't pray, either.  My MIL has told us multiple times recently, "Keep Twan's cousin in your prayers..." and I think to myself, Why don't you let ME decide who I will and won't pray for.

I can't really explain why this gets on my nerves so much, but it really does.  I just hate the wording, I guess.  It's so demanding and presumptuous -- "Here is how you should use your quiet time and thoughts."

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"As of page 2 this might be the most boring argument ever. It's making me long for Rape Day." - Mouse

Re: Vibez and preyers

  • When somebody here requests vibez for their inner circle (them, their husband, kid, dog) that does not bother me.  I think it is better than just coming out, telling a Debbie Downer story, and then walking away.  I would rather send my "vibezzzz" then to just leave the story all cold and alone on the board.  And also, I encourage them to come out and tell their sad story.  It gives a better picture as to who this person is that I "talk" to everyday.

    However, it really bugs me to be asked for my prayers, because that is very presumptious of where my beliefs fall.  And as always, the requests for the friend's brother's girlfriend's butcher is a no go for me. 

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  • I cannot figure out why you make a distinction between asking for TP for a H or family members and asking for a poster.  Both are telling you "how you should use your quiet time and thoughts" and not letting YOU "decide who you will and won't pray for."

    If anything, I'd find asking for fellow posters more irritating since presumably you are already aware of whatever the issue is and have chosen whether to spend your quiet time on it.  But really, I just don't get being irritated at people essentially expressing concern.  It's not like you are being compelled to pray about anything.

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  • It doesn't bother me when it is about someone they care about, not some random person in their hometown or some crap.  I think most of the time it is a way for them to process their fear, etc.

    It seems to me like an odd thing to be bothered about.

  • I think that most regulars here use vibez posts as a way of communicating information rather than actual request for prayers/TP/etc. It's more about getting something off your chest. 

    Even if it wasn't, I don't mind requests by people I know for themselves, but the randoms and "please send TP to my uncle's cousin's dog's brother" ones are stupid. I don't know that person.  

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  • I'm cramming into Vinny's non-denominational house of quiet thoughts and encouragement. It seems more natural to read "I need vibezz and here's why" than "This is why my life sucks right now." The latter seems more AW-y to me for some reason.

    I'm a cold hearted snake, but the ones where lurkers/regs from other boards/randoms come over and say "My grandmother's bridge partner's granddaughter fell in a well!" that stick in my craw. It's a sad story, but it feels more like the person is looking to AW/attach themselves to tragedy.

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    Husbands should be like Kleenex: Soft, strong, and disposable.
  • fenton, I'm going to prey for you because you seem a little bitchy lately.  VIBEZZZ!
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • When it's for a fellow poster, I feel like the idea is to create a post where everyone types something encouraging for that other person.  The OP doesn't get any benefit of the sympathy.  When someone asks for vibez for their mom, inevitably the response is "I'm sorry you're going through this" to the requester, and that seems like a subtle attempt at AWing.

    My reaction is probably exacerbated by the fact that I'm a private person.  If someone in my family is sick or dying, I just don't talk about it.  I feel like it just serves to make me the center of attention to bring it up, which is the part I find distasteful.

    FYI, this was not prompted by anybody here, it was a family-member preyers request I read on another board.

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    "As of page 2 this might be the most boring argument ever. It's making me long for Rape Day." - Mouse
  • I'm curious as to how much thoughtenergy/quiet time this imposes on.  When someone asks for vibezz, my general reaction is thinking, "God (because that how I believe), be with X, and help resolve this situation in the best possible way."  I mean, at most, the thought of who The Bachelorette should choose gets pushed out of my mind for 20 seconds.
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  • I wish you would share that stuff.  I want to know how your mom is doing instead of you saying something about her health in passing.
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    "That chick wins at Penises, for sure." -- Fenton
  • image_Fenton:

    When it's for a fellow poster, I feel like the idea is to create a post where everyone types something encouraging for that other person.  The OP doesn't get any benefit of the sympathy.  When someone asks for vibez for their mom, inevitably the response is "I'm sorry you're going through this" to the requester, and that seems like a subtle attempt at AWing.

    My reaction is probably exacerbated by the fact that I'm a private person.  If someone in my family is sick or dying, I just don't talk about it.  I feel like it just serves to make me the center of attention to bring it up, which is the part I find distasteful.

    FYI, this was not prompted by anybody here, it was a family-member preyers request I read on another board.

    I think asking for vibezzzzz for yourself or a family member has the same intent: Looking for encouragement or sympathy. In some cases, you can also get reassurance, like when Christin posted about her dad and some people said "Oh, my grandpa/uncle/dad also had that and he turned out just fine!"

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    Husbands should be like Kleenex: Soft, strong, and disposable.
  • So do you also hate "I bought a house" or "I'm pg" or "I'm going to NYC" or is it just when people post about sad things in their lives?
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  • It's not the amount of time dedicated to thinking about that person, it's the arrogance of saying, "Wish for nice things for MEEEEE."

    I am pretty b!tchy right now, though.  It's OK, I own it.
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    "As of page 2 this might be the most boring argument ever. It's making me long for Rape Day." - Mouse
  • AW is what we do here.  Even with the random debates, you are arguing your side of the coin.  You are expressing how you think and feel.  We are selfish/self-centered people who believe our opinion is the best one out there.  Even with the disclaimer, "that's just my opinion," or "whatever works for ___," we are still self-centered a-holes.  I see no need to try to avoid that fact.
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  • imageFallinAgain:
    So do you also hate "I bought a house" or "I'm pg" or "I'm going to NYC" or is it just when people post about sad things in their lives?

    Yeah, those things don't have the Debbie Downer effect so I don't react the same way.  And you can just not comment on those, if you want, and not feel guilty.

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    "As of page 2 this might be the most boring argument ever. It's making me long for Rape Day." - Mouse
  • Fenton Translator:

    I'm in a really bad place right now, and there's some stuff going on with Twan/my Mom/my vag, but I'm not letting down this tough exterior for one minute.  It would be awesome if my internet besties would pray to the good lord Jesus that all of my troubles would go away and I can live in peace and happiness with my loved ones.  I know the combined energies of your prayers are all I need to get through this tough time, and while I would never impose on you by asking for them, I'm secretly wishing that you will all pray for me, as I pray for each of you, every night. 

    Yours in God,

    Fenton

    Don't Worry Fent, my Vibez are heading straight your way.

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    3 out of 4 dead babies agree! pepsi is better than coke! - EdithBouvierBeale
    Lordy. Grow some balls and stop lurking. It's like stealing from the internet. Jesuschrist. -- AudreyHorne
    I hate love and marriage. I got married so I could destroy these things from the inside. - NoisyPenguin
    It's a good thing my circle of trust is as giant as my vagina. That only leaves a couple people out. - Cali
  • image_Fenton:

    It's not the amount of time dedicated to thinking about that person, it's the arrogance of saying, "Wish for nice things for MEEEEE."

    I am pretty b!tchy right now, though.  It's OK, I own it.

    But, don't you wish for nice things for (most, at least) posters?  I get being annoyed at, say, that Austinpoop chick who used to pop in only to announce that she was pg and collect congrats or that she miscarried and collect pity.  That was irritating.

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  • image_Fenton:

    imageFallinAgain:
    So do you also hate "I bought a house" or "I'm pg" or "I'm going to NYC" or is it just when people post about sad things in their lives?

    Yeah, those things don't have the Debbie Downer effect so I don't react the same way.  And you can just not comment on those, if you want, and not feel guilty.

    Oh, I see.  Yeah, I just don't feel guilt.

    Fallin's cold heart: 1      Fenton's coldish heart: 0

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  •  there's some stuff going on with Twan/my Mom/my vag

    This sounds super inappropriate!  My mom doesn't have much to do with my vag these days.

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    "As of page 2 this might be the most boring argument ever. It's making me long for Rape Day." - Mouse
  • I think the tragedy whores are pretty easy to spot.

    If it's a nestie I don't "know" I won't even open the thread, generally.

    If it's an ML regular, I might post something even if they're not a friend... because I want to lull people into thinking that I'm nice.

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    Yeah that's right my name's Yauch!
  • I don't mind when friends (poster friends) ask for support for themselves or their family.  That's all Vibez/Preyer Requests are . . . a calling for support.  I want to know when my friends need my support and I'm happy to give it, even if it's just a statement to say that I'm thinking of them and care.

    It's super lame when asked for support for girlfriend's dog's former owner's sister, but I think we're all on the same page about that.  And if someone asks for Vibez/Preyers and I don't care, I have no issue not replying in a thread about it.

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  • oh, and to respond to Fent's complaint, it's lame that you think these types of requests are telling you what to do with your quiet time.  If you are that susceptible to the written word, I request that you come over and wash my dishes.  Not gonna do it, huh?  Well, then.  :::stomps off:::
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  • Fenton, I haven't pooped in 5 days. I ask for you to pray for my rectum in these difficult times.
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    For less then ten cents a day, you can feed a hungry child.
  • imageAngieP900:
    Fenton, I haven't pooped in 5 days. I ask for you to pray for my rectum in these difficult times.

    I hope no one else needs vibes today because I'm handing all of mine over to you. You must be miserable.

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    11/11/11 = 5 years. Woah!
  • So if someone posts only about happy things going on in their lives, then we never get to see their crazy, right?  We need tragedy up in here to reveal crazy.  I'm disappointed in you Fenton.
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