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Having Kids is a Get Out of Work Free Card...
** First of all, want to start off this post by stating that I understand that being a parent is really hard work and I believe family comes first. I am only talking about the situation at my place of employment. Don't want to offend anyone! **
Just have to vent, I'm a researcher and I typically work over 40 hours a week, on salary. All of the other employees in my same position at my job have kids and are constently leaving work early, coming in late, etc to deal with stuff for their kids. It's really frusterating because we're all on salary, so we don't get paid by the hour and so we're all getting paid the same amount and I'm working way more hours since I don't have a child to excuse me from work. I have to pick up slack all the time to cover for them with the patients. I'm exhausted! And starting to hate going to work since I'm so burnt out. Thanks for letting me vent!
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Re: Having Kids is a Get Out of Work Free Card...
In my experience I have met with two kinds of parents. There are the ones who are always taking off to go shuffle their kids around, and there are the ones who seem to make it work just fine and never leave early. Now it is always possible that the ones who work their hours just have more help and don't need to leave, but I'm more inclines to believe that the ones leaving early are the people who would find a reason to do so regardless of whether they had children. They tend to be the people who make a big deal out of everything anyway.
(Although, I also know a number of salaried people who take work home with them. You never know whether your coworkers are doing this also)
This is not an issue with the people who have kids, it's an issue with the lab manager who lets them do this all the time. I would venture to say that a vast majority of parents find ways to be able to get their work done and have their children taken care of. You just happen to be working with a couple of slackers.
And I agree with everything the pp said.
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I'm guilty of *occasionally* doing this with my nephew. Very rarely, but sometimes I just need to get out of the office a little early before I go insane, and I just say that he called me sick from school.
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My coworker is late pretty much everyday and is out all the time! I think it's ok to do that now and then but she's REALLY taken advantage of it. This week my boss has been out and she hasn't come into the office less than an hour late and this is the second day this week that she's been out all morning! Now THAT'S a little much!
FYI, when your child is sick they are not allowed to attend daycare or school most of the time. Therefore, the parent is responsible for taking care of them.
I've had to call in a lot this year due to my son getting sick from other kids at daycare. It's been so bad that he, SO and I have all gotten sick at once from daycare germs. We have both had to call in on these occasions, and no it was not a fun way to spend PTO. Neither of us have jobs we can do from home though, so yes our coworkers ended up picking up the slack. That's the responsibility they agreed to when they accepted the positions, and we pick up their slack when they go on vacations etc, so it evens out anyway.
That's great that you don't have kids, but since you're not a parent, you might want to refrain from making judgments about what those parents are doing. You also don't know the agreements made between supervisor/employee regarding times like this, so maybe you need a perspective check. Your management most likely has no problem with this as it continues to happen under their watch.
If you have such a big issue with it, why are you posting it here instead of discussing with your management? If you feel you're being treated unfairly then maybe you should talk to your supervisor and see what they can do about hiring additional staff to pick up the slack.
This. I"ve also noticed that the people taking off more, tend to not get as large of raises.
I'm hoping that this response isn't meant to be taken seriously...but I'm getting the impression it is.
Based on what OP said, I think we can infer that her co-workers are NOT taking PTO for childcare issues. So no...this isn't the same as you picking up their slack when they go on vacations. That's their PTO.
YOU decided to have kids. If your kid gets sick, that's not your company's (or your coworkers') problem. I've worked with parents before, and they've done a great job with balancing sick kids w/ their work by making up hours, or taking time off.
I do agree that OP should be talking to management about this...but not to hire additional staff (seriously?). Management might want to know about employees that are using company's time for childcare issues.Um, yeah, you're just making excuses. I'm one of the only people in my department without kids, so I am very familiar with daycare rules. Many of my coworkers have had to take sick days because their kids are sick.
Do you know what they do? They work at night, work a little later to get things done, work from home, and thank me if I happen to cover their work. Many leave at 5 on the dot, but most of them also come in a little earlier.
Having kids is not a get-out-of-work early pass. YOU decided to have kids, so it's up to YOU to make it work. Not me.
I'm a mom. I bill the same 1900 hours+ that my non-parent colleagues do (unless I'm on maternity leave). I travel for work, come in early, and stay late.
HOWEVER, I prefer to take work home with me to complete after I feed, bathe, and read stories to my kids. Tuesday night I went to bed at midnight; Wednesday it was almost 1.
Yes, my kids get sick. Sometimes I can't meet last-minute requests because I don't have childcare. But if you give me sufficient warning, I can usually pull it off.
You have an issue with a specific colleague. Don't paint us all with the same brush.
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This. (Well, said, AD.) Not surprisingly, the women in my workplace who had trouble managing their lives before having children...are now having trouble managing after kids, too, and are out often. The only difference is before it was roommate/friend/boyfriend/car drama...and now it's kid drama.
IMO, whether you are routinely dumping work on your colleagues has much more to do with your work ethic than whether you have children or not. If you need proof of this, please refer to the to the poster who lies about her 'sick' nephew to get out of work. Like I said, that has everything to do with work ethic and nothing to do with being responsible for a child.
Um, no. I didn't agree to do my job and the job of every parent in my area when I took this posotion. I agreed to do my job. If you want me to do your job, give me your money. Yes, you may pick up my slack when I'm on vacation, but we both get the same vacation. You are taking extra sick time on top of it. And thinking that the company will hire more people to do your job while you are at home with your kids is selfish and absurd. They hired you to do your job, not to sit at home with your kids while they pay a second person to do your job.
1. Nope, they agreed to their jobs, not to cover yours. Are you saying you never take time off for vacations or anything other than sickness?
2. That's the point; agreement or not, it's not fair to her. She's doing someone else's work just because she doesn't have the kid excuse.
3. She's just venting:)
FWIW, I think it's unfair how many parents get slack at work for their kids, and I'm a parent. I can tell you that I have not used my kids to get out of work (We are fortunate, though, to have parents and ILs in town so when K gets sick, one of them can usually come up...DH and I rarely miss work for kid sickness). I do, however, get asked to do much less now. Before I had kids, I was always asked to chaperone dances, concerts, serve on this and that committee, and now those "invites" have slowed. I still don't think it's fair or right though, and I try to go to those anyway without sacrificing time with my family (ie: coming late to concerts or doing the late dance shift so I can be home in time for bed).
Have you talked to your boss?
That's great. You aren't in the group that the OP was venting about, so no need to take it personally.
I work in a small office, so there are only two moms. One is extremely hard-working... comes in at 7 every morning so she can leave at 3 to pick up her kids. Sometimes she leaves early, but she'll always make up for it that week... Will stay late if we need her help on a project. She's great.
Then there's the mom that has two kids... and if they were really "sick" as often as she says, they have more health issues than a day at home with mommy can cure. This woman did not come in a single day last week, "works" from home... which consists of not e-mailing or calling anyone back all day. and then she comes in the next week and mentions something about what her kids did at camp last week.
Really? Johnny built a volcano at camp? Because I thought he was home sick with you...
There are plenty of mothers with a strong work ethic, who will only stay home with their kids if that's their only option. Unfortunately, there are some who use their children as excuses to get out of as many obligations as possible...
Not generalization... just observation.
I agree totally with those who say it's more about the work ethic than the kids. Unfortunately for some people, kids are an easy way to get out of work and most people usually don't question their excuses too much.
I get mad too when parents I work with leave early for dr. appointments etc. but I try to remember that I'll be able to benefit from these policies at some point, and I'll be grateful for them. I also try to remember that they could be working from home etc. and I just don't know it. The good thing is, the way our company is, I don't have to pick up their slack too often. I may feel differently if I did.
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