Okay first a little backstory: I've had a pretty rough history when it comes to sex - I had a micro-perforate hymen and had to have a hymenectomy about a year and a half ago. I still had a lot of anxiety in this area so I've been seeing a counselor and working with dilators for almost a year now and things have gotten significantly better in regards to inserting tampons, gynecological exams, fingering etc. The whole time I've been doing this though, I've been single (broke up with my ex of 3 years in September and decided I needed some time to myself). I didn't start dating until May and all of those were all pretty casual and short-lived.
Now though, I've been seeing someone for almost 2 months and we just started sleeping together. I know that with the issues that I've had, some amount of pain during is just going to be a given for a while until I get used to things. Condoms and lots of lube have been REALLY helpful. But this time I just want to have a real sexual experience, not me just "getting through it", which isn't much fun for either person.
All I've ever done is missionary position, partially because of anxiety of pain. People have suggested girl-on-top but I can't seem to get the hang of it - things slip out and I'm not really sure what to do, etc. If anyone has any tips on this or ideas about any other positions that might be good for the issues I'm having it would be REALLY appreciated.
Thanks in advance!
Re: positions suggestions?
I agree. You should give it a try.
sexinfo101.com has 3-D illustrations of positions and pornhub.com has free porn (stick to amateur).
this site (sexinfo101) is fantastic! I'm bookmarking it, thanks so much!
I have problems with sex too. Not because of hymen issues but ovaries and I find girl-on-top the best for me with regards to pain because of pressure and stuff. And also because I'm in control that way I don't end up in pain..
If you're not sure what to do or anything like that ontop you can always be on top and kinda still have him do the thrusting.. does that make sense? That way you still have the control but it's kind of like missionary in a way still too..
Agreed. Also, this will help if your legs are inside his, which will narrow his space to thrust but still gives both of you pleasure.
Girl on top is awesome. As long as he doesn't get too enthusiastic (and with proper communication, he won't), you have complete control over what goes on. It's also the best position for grinding the clit with penetration. If thrusting is too painful, you can always stick with the end of the penis and grind to orgasm.