Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
My crazy weekend (long)
So my H and I took my sister, BIL, and BIL's girlfriend boating on our new boat yesterday. We boat up in Lake Ontario but live in Pennsylvania, so it's about a 3.5 hour drive. My H, sis, and I drove together, and my BIL and GF followed behind. The GF was supposed to go to the beach but couldn't at the last minute, so I invited her to boat with us. Overall, it was an awesome day of boating on the lake, the weather was perfect, everyone got along, etc.
So a little backstory on my BIL: in the time that I've known him he has had three serious girlfriends. The first one (B) he met in high school and they dated for about four years. Everyone in my H's family thought they would get married, but for whatever reason, they broke up. I think she cheated on him, they were off and on, and then finally they called it quits.
About a year and a half later he starts dating T, who has a one-month old baby (K). Basically, my BIL fell in love with the baby, but not so much T. He started referring to himself as K's daddy early on, and wanted to adopt him after he had only been dating T for a few months. They kept breaking up and getting back together, and every time they did it was because my BIL missed T's son so much. About a year after dating off and on, my BIL proposed, they started planning a wedding, and bought a house. Two weeks or so after, T confided in me that she was worried my BIL was border-line abusive: he would yell at her, ignore her when he got mad (excessively for days), throw things (including a baby gate) with the baby in the house. It was not a good situation. He kicked her out a few times, she threatened to move out a few times and finally, about 3 months later, did. My BIL took the breakup really hard (more so because of K) but had a new girlfriend (current one) move in about 2 weeks after T moved out. They have also been off/on since they got together (about 11 months now).
Ok, end of back story. So we drive home from boating Saturday night. My H, sis, and I stop at a McDonald's to eat, but BIL and GF drive on, so they are probably 20-30 minutes ahead of us. About an hour after we left McDonald's, I get a call from GF. She is crying frantically, says that she is on the side of the road, doesn't know where she is, that BIL SLAPPED her, she is done with him, can we pick her up? MY BIL DROPPED HER OFF AND LEFT HER ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD, 3 HOURS FROM HOME! Of course, we don't have any clue where she is but figure we'll run into her since it's the same route home. We find her about 20 minutes later, walking down the side of the road. She hops in, says she is done with the BIL, but doesn't want to talk about it anymore.
So we drive home 2 hours in silence, to my sis's apartment. We drop my sis off, and as we are pulling away, GF says that we can just drop her off a gas station nearby. My H and I are like, "What? Why?" Apparently she was texting BIL and he is picking her up and driving her home! WTF?!?! So my H and I ask her, "Are you sure? We don't mind driving you home." But she says no. So we get to the gas station, BIL pulls in about 2 minutes later, GF gets out and we all go home.
I texted her a few hours later to make sure that she's ok, and she said yes and that she and BIL talked things out that night and are going to talk more the next day. I then find out later that the reason she was so upset was because he kept bringing up his old ex-girlfriend (B) because every time he takes a break with GF (and possible while they are not on breaks), he apparently hooks up with B (the last time being in March). GAH. But I guess for now they are staying together?
Anyway, there is more to this story that makes her staying with BIL a BAD idea, but since this is already novel-length I'll spare those details, unless you want to hear 'em.
Re: My crazy weekend (long)
Is BIL your H's brother? I'm really quite sure that abandoning me on the side of the road would be my LINE. As would slapping, but moreso the side of the road thing.
Of COURSE we want more details! You know, if the flippin board would STOP BREAKING.
Husbands should be like Kleenex: Soft, strong, and disposable.
Holy crap, I could finally read the response. Nestgods, I hate you.
Yes, BIL is H's younger brother (he's 26). And dumping me on the side of the road would also be my line, which is why I was shocked when GF told us BIL was going to pick her up. After we had dropped her off, my H and I talked about it and decided we should have refused to stop and just taken her home.
Also, apparently RIGHT after he dropped her off (like, possibly seconds later), my BIL updated his FB status from his phone saying "I'm single . . . finally!!!" I'm not sure if he was driving or had pulled over to post that, but he responded a few times to others who commented, so I'm assuming he was driving. He took that status update off by the next morning.
My MIL is also a huge enabler though, which doesn't help at all. Ugh. I cringe just thinking about her behavior when it comes to him.
WHAAA??? What kind of replies did he get? And what were his responses?? My mind is bottled.
Husbands should be like Kleenex: Soft, strong, and disposable.
My SIL replied, "Ummmmm, aren't you with her right now?" She then texted me because she knew we were boating together and obviously was confused. A few people posted things like, "Yeah right, we've heard this before." This is not the first time he has mentioned breaking up with this chick on FB. Back in December they had gotten a puppy together and then a few weeks later broke up (she was going to move out but never did), and BIL updated his FB status to say, "Got rid of the old biitch but got a new puppy!"
Yeaaaah.
ETA: Oh, and one of his responses (to Saturday's update) was that he wasn't ever getting back with her (I forget what the comment he was responding to said) and then to my SIL's comment he just replied "Nope."
Oh, yes, he is. Quite.
The thing is, he is adored by everyone else in their family. My H and I are the only ones who don't put up with his shiit, perhaps because BIL has been like this since he was little and my H had to deal with it growing up. My MIL says things like "He just wants his own family. He tries sooooo hard to make his relationships works. He just needs to find the right girl." Yeah, MIL, or he needs to stop being a douchebag and you need to stop letting him act like one.
Enabling parents make my blood boil. I want nothing more than to see their spoiled entitlement brats fall on their faces.
Husbands should be like Kleenex: Soft, strong, and disposable.
Wowza.
I am trying to think how Joe would react if this was his brother and I am pretty sure he would have gotten out of the car and said something to him at the gas station. WTF leaves someone on the side of the road??
We drove away quickly once we dropped her off because my H said if BIL tried to talk to us he (H) would have flipped out on him.
The whole situation is flucked up and makes me really happy that siblings can be complete opposites.