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Need to get this off my chest...
My bro and SIL here have 4 kids. Finally, all 4 are in school. My brother is working his butt off to pay bills, and all that. He can't make ends meet on his own. They get a LOT of help (food stamps, social security, my dad). And yet, my SIL STILL WILL NOT GET A JOB. She posted on her FB status how much she really does, and no one understands, and she'd rather be poor and be there for her babies.
This pisses me off, she will not help out my brother, her husband. He is so depressed because he can't make ends meet on his own, and she always says how they are so freakin' poor... yet she won't get some job to help out with anything. I'm just so furious with her, being selfish. I understand she may want to be able to get to school on a moment's notice. But dammit, how can she get there if there's no money to put gas in their gas guzzling Tahoe?
Yes, most every mom wants to be a SAHM. But it's a luxury not everyone can afford, especially in their situation. She just doesn't grasp the whole concept that my 30 something year old married with kids brother should not have to constantly ask his father for money so they can keep their house. I'd love to be there for my child, but I'd rather let Don watch the baby at night so I can get a job to avoid asking our parents for money to help raise the child/ren we decided to have.
Re: Need to get this off my chest...
I don't know why she won't get a part time!! And thank you for understanding. All her friends are all "don't listen to them, you're there for your babies, you keep doing what you do". AND one had the nerve to call me ignorant and naive, then the rest ganged up on me. I just finished a long response to them all. I don't think they realized I'm her SIL, and those kids' aunt. I know their situation better than ANYONE. I let out a lot more in that response than I intended to, and SIL may get pissy, but it had to be said. Every single person in my family thinks it, I just was the one to say it.
Ugh, ignorance about money and helping your husband enjoy being a father to his children irk me.
I think once your kids are in school, you're no longer a "stay at home mom", you're a HOUSEWIFE. "Stay at home mom" implies that there are actually kids at home. I think being a housewife is a luxury for families that can afford it without needing government assistance or having the working parent struggle to make ends meet.
Here's the thing. When the kids are at school, no one is at home making messes that need to be cleaned up. So there is a lot less housework to be done. The number of meals needing to be cooked/made drops since your kids eat lunch at school. The rest of it - laundry and dinner- those are things you can fit in in the evenings and weekends - DINKs (double income, no kids) manage to do it, and they both work.
She's being lazy and selfish.