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Was this overly rude, do you think?

So this happened the other day, and now I can't get it off my mind. I need some unbiased opinions. 

To sum it up, I went to dinner with a couple of girlfriends, and the place that we went to was fairly crowded. We had a table RIGHT by the door, and it was at a place that doesn't take names or reservations, so people just kind of stand there, waiting for a table.

We had literally a wall of people's backs surrounding our table, as they were waiting for a table, and the three of us were feeling kind of claustrophobic. I had the feeling that people weren't even regarding the fact that our table was there, and not really caring that we were trying to enjoy our dinner. Then, this girl kind of grabs back of my chair (she's seriously standing about 2 inches away from me), and it was total instinct, but I shoved her hand off, said something like, "Seriously?" and then went back to my dinner. I felt really stupid about it later, but it was just kind of one those things where it happened before I could even think about it....total instinct. I'm hyper-assertive about my personal space anyway, and I'm wondering if I really need to take it down a notch before I fall into the "aggressive about my personal space" camp.

What do you think?  

Re: Was this overly rude, do you think?

  • Shoving her hand off was probably rude. She shouldn't have put it there in the first place, and the "Seriously?" wasn't too out of place, but I wouldn't have touched her. Although that would have annoyed me too. 

  • It sounds like it was a knee-jerk reaction. I'm aggressive about my personal space, too, and would probably have done the same thing, or similar, rude or not.
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  • I probably would have been like 'Woah!' really loud and moved forward. But that would have been my initial reaction not yours. Jeez she didn't even apologize for it. I'm sure you were already annoyed by the situation so the person in your bubble made it worse.

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  • It was a gut reaction! I have those too, I always feel cringe-worthy afterwards too. To be honest, she had her hand on your chair, that was more than rude. I understand everyone has to wait but still offer those eating a bit of privacy and space.
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  • Thanks, girls. :) You're saying about what I am thinking as well - I think we were both in the wrong. She definitely should have not been so inconsiderate, and I should have asked her to please move her hand off my chair rather than just push it off. I'll definitely have to try to do a little better next time, if I can't avoid another situation like that. Hate when I lose my composure, though.  
  • LOL at the thought of you being rude.

    No, I don't think you were out of line.  This same thing annoys me about Cheever's - if you sit in that table right by the door people are always crowding your personal space.  Probably should not have touched her but she definitely she not have been TOUCHING THE CHAIR you were sitting in while eating.  She crossed the line first.

  • I don't think it was rude, really.  Anyone who's in my personal space would get whatever I felt like dishing out.  You were eating dinner--back the hell off, I say!  She could've waited outside if there was that little space.  It's not like it's cold out.
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  • I don't think you were rude. I would've done something similar without a doubt. She shouldn't have been invading your personal space anyway. Unless you're at a place like Eischen's where it's basically standing room only throughout the whole place, that's uncalled for.
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  • I think it's the restaurants fault. They need to either move the table to another area and make more 'waiting' space or they need to build a whole different room for those waiting.
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  • It was a knee-jerk reaction. I probably wouldn't have touched her, but I sure as hell would've said something (and it probably would've come off the wrong way). As I'm imagining what I would've done in your situation, I'm pretty sure it would've been worse than what you did. :P

    Who in the world puts their HAND on a clearly occupied chair?! Holy cow!

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  • imageOSUWifey09:

    It was a knee-jerk reaction. I probably wouldn't have touched her, but I sure as hell would've said something (and it probably would've come off the wrong way). As I'm imagining what I would've done in your situation, I'm pretty sure it would've been worse than what you did. :P

    Who in the world puts their HAND on a clearly occupied chair?! Holy cow!

    This.  I probably wouldn't have touched her hand but she probably would have gotten a nasty look or a rude comment.

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