Sex & Romance
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Don't Always Enjoy Sex
I don't always enjoy having sex with my husband. He is a wonderful man, however I find that I dread being intimate with him. At first I thought that it may be because I am not physically attracted to him, but that is far from the case. I experience extreme discomfort during intercourse and he takes 20-30 minutes to orgasm. I've tried talking with him about the discomfort and it really bothers him, however he constantly wants to have sex. I am running out of ideas. Any suggestions? Anyone experienced the same thing?
Re: Don't Always Enjoy Sex
Well we really need more background info. What is uncomfortable during sex? Does it feel too tight? Burn? Itch? Sharp pains?
Also, are you on birth control?
Ditto all of Heather's questions. Are you using lube? Have you talked to your doctor about any of this?
So, he constantly wants sex, even though it causes you pain? Sounds like you picked a prize! I'll be he doesn't make sure you have an orgasm, either.
Tell him that he needs to make sure you have an orgasm first, whether it's by oral, manual, or other stimulation. After you've had an orgasm, you'll be wetter and "softer" which should result in less pain for you. If you don't know what you need to achieve an orgasm, masturbate, figure it out, and show him.
And like a pp said, get your H closer to an orgasm before you start.
It sounds like you've got two different problems here - one is the discomfort and the other is your husband's reaction to it. Both really need to be dealt with and this site may help you with the first one. A friend of mine has found a lot of help through the site and you may want to check it out too.
http://www.vaginismus.com/