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How to get it back?? Will it??
Hi Everyone...lurker here
I've been having trouble with my sex drive. I don't have one! Since my wedding in January...I have not ONCE been interested in sex. My body doesn't even feel the same. All sensitivity is gone..it's become uncomfortable even. I was on birth control and was worried that was the cause so I got off of it over 6 months ago. If the BC was the issue, I would think my sex drive would be back by now. Since I've been so hung up on this I've dissected the past couple of months to see if anything went wrong and truthfully even before the wedding I remember feeling significantly less aroused by most things. I figured it was just the stress but I don't see how it could have been prolonged for this long.
I've tried everything..new positions..new toys...romance..started taking vitamins...yoga..working out...My gyno said it could be depression so I went to a psychiatrist who prescribed a medication that was known to boost libido. That did not work. He added another medication that was a libido booster...and still ...nothing. I even went to an acupuncturist to no avail. I've tested my thyroid but am going back a second time to do another test to confirm. I know that this is a common problem and I see it often in the forums but I was wondering if anyone has ever actually had these problems unrelated to BC and got their sex drive back! I'm looking into seeing a Sex Therapist and also was wondering if anyone has ever gone that route and if it helped. I just don't get it. I'm 24. I don't have a past of any sexual abuse or trauma. I have dealt with depression but truthfully this is what is making me depressed and I can't feel better until things get back to normal.
Just wanted to some hope that maybe I'll stop being broken...
Re: How to get it back?? Will it??
Have you masturbated?
I am guessing no, you never have.
Start immediately.:) I guarantee you'll be psyched up for sex when you find out which touches work and you start having orgasms.
ALso have your hormone levels checked. Sounds to me like you're reporting dryness -- sex is bound to be painful if dryness is present.
This, also, have you taken a pregnancy test? Do you have a history of sexual abuse?
Use plenty of lubricant. Find one you like and go crazy!
edited: I'm sorry OP-- I did see that you said that you didn't have any history of sexual abuse. That was a reading fail on my part. I apologize.
Thanks everyone.
Yes I've masturbated where also in the past it was great and felt good and now even masturbation doesn't feel the same. It seems my sensitivity is completely gone--like my vagina lost all of its nerve endings or something... and we always use lube. My issues are really lack of desire...then dryness...then discomfort...and total unenjoyment
I forgot to mention that yes I did get my hormone levels checked and everything came back "normal". I'm really at a loss and feeling very hopeless and upset. I really do feel like I've tried everything and have tried to be as optimistic as possible but when this many months pass...it really is sad.
The only thing I can suggest at this point since you have been unsuccesfully going the prescription route is looking into your diet. As shocking as it may seem to most people, what you consume is th main impact on how your body feels and works. Here is one book I suggest, but I recommend exploring this subject more. Also, don't forget that excersie naturally fights depression and boosts libido!
http://www.amazon.com/Orgasmic-Diet-Revolutionary-Libido-Orgasm/dp/0307353435/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1284753388&sr=8-1
Do you have any nerve damage?
I'm only asking because so much of sex for women starts in the brain. I don't want to sound off the wall and scary or anything, but I would want to ask to make sure you aren't having any kind of nerve damage, brain tumor, etc. Have you had anything like an MRI done?
You may want to ask your endocrinologist (I assume that's who checked your thyroid, otherwise make an appointment to talk to one!) about Hasimoto's Disease or potentially thyroid cancer. Neither one will show up as something abnormal when they run the panel to check your thyroid. Papillary carcinoma (the most common thyroid cancer) is pretty rare, but my 21 year old sister was just diagnosed and one of the symptoms that brought her to the endocrinologist in the first place was a sudden lack of sex drive. They should look for nodules around your thyroid and lymph glands, usually with an ultrasound if they feel anything abnormal.
I also agree with PP about potential nerve issues, although I would guess that the dulling of sensation might be the result of an injury you maybe didn't even notice (do you bike a lot?) or even a concussion, in which case it should get better over time. If it is a brain issue the endocrinologist will likely be a first step anyway- check your hormone levels etc to see if anything's unbalanced that would be controlled by the brain.
Thanks ladies. I really appreciate it. I have an appointment tomorrow morning with an endicronologist. My brother had thyroid cancer so it's not in the impossible realm of possibilities. Hopefully I can get some sort of clarification tomorrow at my appointment.
As far as injury-- I really don't think that's the case. I could definitely be more active but any activity doesn't involve biking or anything causing pressure in that region.
I can't help but feel very sad. I'm only 24 and it's so hard to deal with sexual dysfunction as a newly wed. DH is understanding but of course frustration leads to unnecessary tension and arguments that could otherwise be avoided. I WANT to be sexual again--just feel like I lost it.