Sex & Romance
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
what's happening
We've been married 2 years and my libido has kicked into overdrive and my husband's has stayed the same or decreased a little. Sex is very satisfying for both of us, but the frequency isn't enough for me. Is there any tips anyone may have to help my husband want to do it more often?
Re: what's happening
Ok a male response (does anyone know how to change my 'grily' avatar?)
If a man finds that his female partner has a greater appetite than he does, his best ploy is to reduce his orgasms during their sex sessions,...yes, that means NOT cuming every time!
The male partner will probably have some initial frustration at the beginning but one can soon adapt and since orgasm and ejaculation is reduced, ones ability to get aroused and erect, and indeed to enjoy teh sexual contact is actually enhanced. The woman needs to be 'on board' with this for it to be successful.
The ancient Chinese were very aware and thoughtful about this difficulty and the traditional texts have much good advice,...female sexuality was/is considered to be a 'water' force and male sexual energy to be 'fire'. fire is easily extinguished by water,...so the man should conserve his fire and concentrate on bringing the woman to the boil...!!.....
....There are several important advantages to NOT cumming EVERY time!
This wasn't about her partner not cumming every time. It was about how she wants to have sex more often than he does.
That said, just recently I got a huge boost in my libido out of nowhere and I oversexed my husband. He just couldn't go anymore. He wanted to and, bless him, he tried, but he was exhausting himself and it left both of us less than satisfied. Maybe that's happening?
Er,...I don't think you understood what I posted,...there is a direct link between how much a man ejaculates and how much/often he can get erect and have sex.......also, how interested he is in sex.
............If he foregoes his orgasm/ejaculation on SOME occaisions he will be able to have more intercourse and keep up with his partners desire for more sex....
I'm NOT advocating somethin that I have not done. I have been in the same difficulty of having a partner who had very high sex drive/needs at a particular place in her monthly cycle,..a phenomena that many women experience. At that time the only way to keep up the action and supply her with enough sexual attention was to NOT ejaculate EVERY time. At first it's uncomfortable but I soon got used to it and even quite enjoyed being able to give her pleasure without any personal climax. You can still enjoy sexual arousal, erection and most of the pleasure of sex,..it's just a matter of holding back from a climax until a later episode. Things can get very exhausting with career and other demands on ones energy,...sometimes the only intelligent option is to manage ones energy better and conserve it. This really IS a solution to men in this position.
Remember that women can have an unlimited number of orgasms in a short period but a man is (normally) tied to orgasm with ejaculation and there is a limited amount available for most men until they naturally recuperate their energy/semen.
If you really are in love with a woman you will adapt to give her what she needs........