Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
s/o kids, cell phones and such
Misa mentioned in EDK's thread about kids and cell phones. I started thinking about it and realized that my upstairs neighbor, whom I affectionately call Superman, is in 4th grade and has had a cell phone for at least the past two years.
In his case, he has had one because his dad won't let him call his mom and "use his minutes" while he's spending the night (they've been separated since Superman was about 8 months old). He's also involved in every sport known to little boys and California weather and is carpooled by numerous individuals to his activities. It's also one of those kid phones with the ability to only call 4 phone numbers.
Thinking back to when I was around his age, I realized that I started babysitting when I was not much older than him. And that I was watching kids that were not yet walking.
Are things now just that much different that kids today aren't ready for that responsibility? I don't know if I would leave my toddler with Superman and he's the most amazing kid I've ever met. At what age would you give your child a cell phone?
Re: s/o kids, cell phones and such
I do think there is a difference between a regular cell phone and one that only allows outgoing calls to select numbers (this CW's niece isn't one of those, it's a regular full cell phone).
That said, growing up in Pennsylvania, you were not allowed to participate in afterschool sports until 7th grade (so around age 12-13). In today's society I'd be willing to consider it then, providing they're engaged in some sort of extra curricular activities that requires them to stay after school, but not before then.
When I was 12-13 and I needed to call my parents, I had a few quarters lying in my backpack and I used the pay phone. I didn't get a cell phone until I was 16 and driving. I realize that most schools have gotten rid of pay phones in the buildings so that is an additional reason why I'd say 12-13. Ideally, I'd love it if a our non-existent future children were not having to need a cell phone until they were 16.
But then again I'd love to go back to a time when we weren't glued to cell phones and the game Monopoly was actually played with the fake money and not a "credit card machine" (has anyone seen the commercial for this?!?!)
This was the same for me, I got a cell at 16 when I started driving. Although my brothers got cell phones at a much younger age because of carpooling etc.
I just had this debate with one of my friends her daughter is 12 and just got her first cell phone. My friend C didn't want to get her one, but she is now taking the city bus to her new school so they wanted her to have a phone. Her cell can be checked at any time by her parents and they monitor her usage/texting. Which I agree with, C says as she matures and earns her independence they will slowly lay-off the monitoring. They also check her e-mail and she is not allowed to have Facebook yet.
I don't know how I would feel about a cell phone for my own children. Considering we don't plan TTC for another 5+ years and then I wouldn't consider a cell until my child is 12-13 we are looking at another 17-18 years. Who knows what the world will be like then.
Oh and I started babysitting at 12/13. I do think kids lack a sense of responsibility and independenc.....I see this with my younger brother who is 12. He is so different than I or my other brother were at that age.
How do you feel about montioring your child's cell phone/facebook/e-mails etc.?
BFP #1 2/28/12- 3/3/12 CP at 4w3d
BFP #2 4/1/12- 5/7/12 Missed M/C at 8w4d (measuring 6w3d)
TTC on hold until December
I have mixed feelings. On one side, I know what I did at 12-15 and who I was talking to and who I shouldn't have been talking to. But at the same time, my parents never monitored me and I feel that I have a great relationship with them because they weren't constantly babying me (like ILs did/does to DH) and they allowed me to live and learn right from wrong.
But things have changed so much even within the past 10+ years that I don't know if you really can get away with not monitoring a child's cell phone/facebook/emails now-a-days.
My parents weren't helicopter parents with me but they very much were with my younger brother. He and I are black and white in personality. I was always afraid of getting into trouble and being punished and my brother was always finding new ways to be troublesome.
I think, like PP said, circumstances would warrant my giving my phantom child a cell phone. Superman plays soccer, baseball, fall baseball, etc through AYSO, B&G Club, etc and is in after school care too. If I were in these circumstances, I would have no hesitation giving my younger elementary school child a way to communicate with me.
If I were my parents now, I would give me a restricted cell phone upon entering high school. It wasn't until high school that I was involved with many after school activities or friends with anyone who had the ability to go anywhere without being dropped off by a parent.
I'm going to date myself now... I got my first cell phone as a sophomore in college. I calculated that the cell cost was less than the long-distance charges I was incurring calling my parents.
My parents never monitored my email, but then again, I was a senior in high school when we got internet at home. Now, I think I would monitor their email/social networking until they leave the nest. 13, 14 maybe 15 would be when I think it's appropriate for their own accounts.
My 5-year-old niece has been playing online social networking "games" with her Webkins for at least 2 years. Kind of scares me!
I'm trying to think back to when I was allowed to "hang out" with friends and I'd venture to guess it was in 5th grade cause that when I was allowed to have house keys. I could go stay out after school with friends but I had to call (from a pay phone b/c I'm the old lady here with my cane lol ... there were no such things as cell phones in those days) in to tell mom when I was going to be home.
That said, Hallie will be 11 (5th grade) in January and we HAD considered getting her a cell this year b/c the kids usually hang out in town at the point but only on Wednesdays since they always have half days. So we're talking from 12:45-3pm. She hasn't earned that privilege in our eyes yet so the phone has been put on hold. She won't be getting those phones w/ only 4 numbers though. I see why they are useful for younger kids but not at this stage of the game.
She played on the webkins site a few years back and that was ok by me b/c the contact with others is extremely limited. Before she was ever allowed (and still now) to sign up on any site I would preview it first. She's not allowed to have a facebook page right now but she does log in as me to play petville. Over the weekend I set up a webite for her (like alot of us did thorugh weebly for our weddings) b/c she's obsessed with hamsters. My email account is linked to it and no personal info is or will ever be on it.