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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Bummed DD didn't make Nutcracker audition, advice please..
I know this sounds crazy, dd is only 7 which is the youngest age they can audition into the Nutcracker with a major ballet company here where we live. This is her 3rd year in the school affiliated with the company and only students can audition. She's always had natural talent (I'm a realist, I'm not just saying it bc I'm her mom) so I'm really surprised she didn't get a part. Thing is, kids that are less talented than her got a call back. I know bc I watched them all in class. dd is tall for her age so I was thinking maybe that had something to do with it since they audition by height, not age, since they only have a certain number of costumes in certain sizes. And there are a lot of 8,9 and even 10 year olds her height. I never thought I'd be disappointed about this but I am. DD is fine about it. I know in reality this should not be a very big deal. But I just spend so much money on this school and I want to be able to justify the cost. If she had a performance opportunity I would feel much better about the money. Should I talk to her teacher about it, or would she just think I'm being one of "those" parents. I have no problem with her not getting a part, it's just the not knowing why that's bugging me. Sorry, I know this seems trivial...
Re: Bummed DD didn't make Nutcracker audition, advice please..
So if she was grouped with people who are 8, 9 and 10... could it be that they were looking for someone with a year or two more of maturity?
This line caught my attention. It makes it sound like you're paying for the big school because you want your daughter to get into the "big performances." Is this your dream or hers?
You ARE being one of THOSE parents.
Fun should rate #1 if she gets a part in something yay her, but don't use IT to justify the money. The fact that your DD likes dancing should justify it. She didn't get the part, get over it, she's flipp'n 7 years old, let her enjoy it!
I'm a ballet dancer? when I was seven I wouldn't have been bothered if I didn't get a part? not until I was around 11 or so did I start to take things personally. I'd say that if she enjoys it, and she wants to be doing it, let her have fun!
Also, unless you are a dancer, you probably aren't seeing something that the instructors are. Maybe she has a natural talent for it, but it's possible that the other girls had better technique.
I have learned from DD being in a play (amateur kid's camp production, but there were some adults in the production who were SAG actors), that a lot of casting DOES have to do with height. In DD's case, she was cast in the role she was in b/c of her height and b/c she was a girl. It was all about the number of costumes they had. To quote the Johnny Bravo episode of the Brady Bunch "we chose you because you fit the suit." If there was one other girl taller than DD, DD would have had a different role. One of the (pro) actresses is rather petite, and she told me there are sometimes height minimums for adults in children's productions, so they is a clear distinction between the kids and the adults.
It could be that based on height, your DD would have been cast for a different group - mostly because of costumes and b/c in dance they like uniformity. A group of 8, 9, and 10 year olds, and she was competing against THEM (who have been dancing for many more years), not against her 7 year old peers.
Don't worry - - if she keeps up at it and is as good as you say, she will have more opportunities down the road! Also, you might want to see if they are casting for "the nutcracker" in any other regional ballet companies. That will give her an opportunity to meet new friends, to perform, and to work on whatever steps they use for the production.
Also - - can you speak to any of the instructors / casting directors? Ask them why your DD was not chosen for a call back? If you can't ask a casting director directly, ask one of your dd's instructors to ask on your behalf. Do it from the "She was very disappointed, I'd like to know what she needs to work on over this year to improve her chances next year." rather than a "that's so unfair, what were they thinking?!?" context.
And remember, MANY famous performers have been overlooked at different times in their career!
I went to college for theatre and dance and my professors used to say, "If you didn't get a part, it's not because you did bad. It's because someone else did better and fit the part better."
Your child may have not been what they were looking for. That's how the theatre and dance world works. Years ago I auditioned for Mannheim Steamroller, the main reason I got the part was because I am short. I had a friend who is about 3 inches taller than me who had a great monologue, and she didn't get a part because she was a little too tall. They do type cast along with how talented someone is. You just experienced what life is like in the theatre and dance world. Sometimes you get a part and sometimes you don't. Directors look at so many things, do they look good together, do they listen to directions, do they learn quickly, do they move well together, is there chemistry, and so much more.
I think you need to step back, and just let your daugher enjoy dance. Don't justify putting your daughter in dance by her getting a part in the Nutcracker. You said she doesn't care, so I think you need to let it go. Let her enjoy dancing.
This.
They have to fit a costume. Consequently, your DD is competing for a spot with girls who are going to be more mature and poised and reliable on stage and for whom this may be the last shot at the role.
My godchild is a dancer/musical theater major. The audition/rejection process is not for the feignt of heart.
Mama Rose Havoc much?
Google the name. Maybe you'll back off with being such a stage mother and Mama Rose.
Gotta back off here. Sorry; but you sound kind of stage mother.
Time to put on your big girl panties
I've got your rainbows and ponies right here
Mama Rose Havoc much?
Google the name. Maybe you'll back off with being such a stage mother and Mama Rose.
Yes this is exactly like that! If she doesn't make it as a ballet dancer she can always become a stripper! Then I can live another dream of mine vicariously...
oh please
You know, kids sometimes don't make the team, squad or part. It's disappointing, but can be good for them.
I played volleyball in grade school, high school and college. I didn't make this "super elite" squad when I tried out in 8th grade, despite being better than a lot of other girls who did make it. A couple years later, I was playing for a different squad and made the "B" squad instead of the "A" squad. I didn't make varsity at my high school as a freshman or sophomore. I didn't make another elite squad my senior year of high school. But you know what? I kicked a$$ in college. Turns out, I had somewhat of a chip on my shoulder and needed a good coach to bring it out. And it was brought out with a vengeance and I had the time of my life. Maybe I wouldn't have worked as hard if I had made all those teams so easily.
When I was a college student I did a part-time, one semester nanny gig a couple hours a week. One of my responsibilites was to drive one of the girls to ballet practice. I got SO invested in her success. I completely get that you got surprised by your feelings. I was shocked and I cn only imagine it's about 1000x worse with a beautiful daughter.
So, have your feelings, realize it happens and put yourself in check when disappointed.
And I think there is a right way and a wrong way to say to the instructors "why not my kid?". If you can't ask about the process and ask for help to moderate your expectations, there is something odd about the program. If you can ask without attitude then ask. It may not reveal anything other than this is the way this business works. Its a crap shoot.
Speaking as someone who's done casting with children, if you go to an instructor or a casting director and say "Why didn't Little Sally get a part?", you're going to be remembered. And not in the way you want to be.
I danced in The Nutcracker for years. Like your daughter, I was always tall for my age, and I didn't usually get cast in the parts I wanted. Because of my height, I was competing for roles with older girls. It's just part and parcel of being a child in the theater: older kids who can play younger kids because they're short tend to get way more parts than younger kids who can play older kids because they're tall.
If she's going to do this for any length of time, rejection is just part of the game. The sooner you and she get used to it and move on, the better.
this. i am a director, and more times than i can tell you, i could have cast a show several different ways, and it would have been just as good.
i also agree that you don't want to become a parent that the directors and others don't want to deal with. unfortunately, they know that if they cast your kid, they're kind of casting you, too, and they've got enough challenges to deal with putting a production together.
Exactly. Don't say anything to her teacher or the director about the audition. You'll be labeled as "difficult" and that could affect her chances next year. Maybe after a few weeks you could casually ask her teacher what DD should work on to improve, but don't mention the audition.
This.