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Baby envy...
** BACKSTORY**
DH is trying to be an air-traffic controller. He took the test this time last year and got a 92% (I guess that's pretty good). My dad is an air-traffic controller and he found out they're doing the selection this month to determine who gets to go to training. We picked GA and FL for the states to work in because my dad told us that those are where they need the most people. So if DH does get in, then we are moving out of state next year.
DH and I had always planned on being married at least two years before having kids. Now we want to have been married for at least two years, and have a house. Wherever we end up we want to rent for a year just to kinda get to know the area, then start looking for a house. So it may be a while before we have kids.
Now I know that's completely rational and responsible of us, but four of my FB friends have just had babies and three of them are pregnant and I'm sooooo jealous. I really really want a baby. I know we're not financially ready, and we need to take the time to just be a couple for a while... But my girly hormones are making me baby crazy.
*end of rant*
lol
Re: Baby envy...
Hey lex, I understand where you're coming from. I have slight baby envy, or maybe it's slight baby product envy. I have a friend who is (hopefully!) giving birth in the next few days and she talks and blogs about all the fun things they have set up in their DD's nursery, like her bouncy chair, her cloth diapers, and her stroller. Sometimes I wish DH and I were pregnant now, but I know that feeling stems from wishing we were farther along in life. But we chose to get married young and will have to sacrifice for a few years until we have disposable income.
DH is in a good, financially-stable job, but we're in an apartment. While I like apartment living, I refuse to raise a baby in one. I'm not doing myself a favor by thinking 12 steps ahead of the game. H and I need to be focused on searching for houses, building up our credit, and saving money. I know that even though I feel like I want a baby now, I'd feel even more guilty bringing a child into the world when DH and I aren't financially ready. I want to give my future children the best of everything and not have to skimp because we had kids at the wrong time money-wise.
Do the creep.
This exactly. My parents got married young and had a baby young so it took years and years before they had disposable income. I want to fast forward to that point in life where we have a house that's decorated how I want it and are thinking about babies, but we can't.
I have a *little* baby envy but luckily I have enough nieces and nephews right now to help balance me out a little bit.
DH and I both agreed that we wanted to wait about 2 years and see where we were at. Part of that included making sure that I had a job, and we were in the process of getting settled into a new house because our little house doesn't have much room and the only available space is upstairs (up steep stairs) which isn't very climate controlled and definitely not a space I want my baby to be in!
Lucky for me I just got the job part so now we can focus on taking care of some other things like a little debt and getting ourselves closer to be able to look at new house options! Just have to be patient!
I know how you feel...I know we are not financially ready, but I do look forward to that point in our life when we can have babies.
I have so much student loan debt that I must take a few years to pay that down first..because $500 a month in SL payments..just wouldn't cut it with a child at home. Hoping that by the time we have kids, my income will be our daycare, trips, savings, reapirs money..and my DH's money will cover the mortgage and recurring payments.
Yea, this is it exactly.
Not only am I having baby envy, but my parents are having hardcore grandbaby envy. Lol
Hearing screaming babies at the store does help a little, but hanging out with my best friend and her two year old or my three year old nephew doesn't. Ooor looking at the baby costumes at Target. But alas, we will wait.I'm 32, and almost everyone I know has kids, or is pregnant now, so it's hard to keep waiting. It took me so long to find the man I was meant to be with, that now that I've found/married him I feel like I should be able to just get pregnant. But I know that we'll be in a more stable situation in the spring, and having some months between the wedding and getting pregnant will allow us time to enjoy being just us.
I think I"m broken. I have the opposite of baby envy right now. DH and are are planning on having kids in about 2 years, but I hear the stories of how my friends are so sleep deprived and depressed....I wish I'd had the oppritunity to meet DH 10 years earlier and have kids before the horror stories started rolling in.
DH and I are fully dedicated to enjoying our first 2 years of marraige child free.
I'm broken too, so no worries. I'm barely 25 and DH is 23, we don't own our home yet, and I don't even have a job right now. Babies are not something that I'm looking forward to right now or for a long time. Personally I don't understand why everyone wants to reproduce so quickly. lol Enjoy your marriage before you add a baby into the mix.
*BIO w/ vendor reviews*
DH and I used to talk about starting our family around the age of 30 - I'm going to be 28 this year and 30 seems too soon! I def. do not have baby envy - I'd rather us both focus on our career and start a family when we are settled with that and own a home together....
This being said, a coworker of mine just left to be a stay at home mom with her 6-month son - she had been unhappy since coming back to work and really missed being home with him, and I was a little jealous at first that she was already at the point in life of really being settled and having a family, then I remembered that she is 5 years older than me, so I have time.
I have the fever too, and we are waaay off from being ready. DH and I are both still young (24 and 25) but had been together for almost 6 years when we got married so we are definitely feeling the pressure from others to make "a little us" and that we could make it work. Ummmm...not a good idea!
We are trying to pay off credit card debt and a car loan before the fall so I can to go to grad school and DH still wants to finish his BA. Hello new (and existing) SLs!
Yes friends and family, we realize we could "make it work" but your encouragement in making an irresponsible decision is not helping my FEVER! Plus, I enjoy that we can be a little selfish with our time and leftover cash flow!
My Mom gave me both a handmade baby dress, and a little boy's coverall set (handmade too) for wedding shower gifts! Argh! The woman is crazy with the baby fever.
Unfortunately for her, DH and I are not. I have to wait another 8 months to complete my professional licencing in order to ensure that I have absolute job security if I was to take an extended maternity leave. I also want to live care and fancy free for a while. All of my cousin's had children super early (20 - 25) so now I am 'behind' according to my Mom. She's the only sibling in her family without grandchildren.
I pointed out to her that she got married at 24 and had me at 28 so I don't see any reason why there is a panic for me to have a kid when I just turned 26. That kept her quiet for all of 5 seconds. Sigh...
We're the first in any of our groups of friends to get married - I'm not eager to be the first to have a kid or to have children when no one else is even close. I'll wait another 2 years quite happily.
Married Bio