October 2009 Weddings
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baby shower etiquette

This situation has me scratching my head a little bit and I'm curious to hear from the moms to be and folks who have thrown baby showers.  One of DH's 40 cousins on his dad's side just had a baby.  They came home from the hospital last week sometime and I got a facebook invite today from the baby's mom about a shower she's throwing at her apartment and where she's registered.  This is the second baby shower I've been invited to in the last year that was essentially thrown and hosted by the baby's mom.  Is this normal? 

I guess I've always thought of baby showers much like a bridal shower.  You don't throw them for yourself.  "ooh, look I had a kid, come buy me stuff" doesn't sit well with me.  But maybe doing it for a baby is ok and I'm living in an archaic world where etiquette hasn't gone out the window??? 

Either way, I'm not going because the mom in question lives quite a ways away and I've met her exactly one time.  DH didn't feel close enough to her to invite her to our wedding and I guess that is my indicator of if I need to put my happy face on and make the trip.   The only reason I'm invited is because she wants a gift.  (sad, but true)

Re: baby shower etiquette

  • Nope, I think it's pretty tacky.  Some people will say "no one is here to throw one for me."  In these cases, I still think it's a little tacky to throw one for yourself.

  • I'm rarely an etiquette follower; I kinda make my own rules when it comes to things like this.  HOWEVER, no, this is tacky.  Imo its gift grabby and nothing more.  It would be one thing if she was throwing a party to say "hey, come visit us and the new baby, just have a small gtg/party" but not an actual shower.  I don't care what someone's reasoning is for this, it still doesn't sit well w/ ME, so I wouldn't go.
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  • If she wants a gift, you should send her the faerie terrarium.
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  • imagemunkii:
    If she wants a gift, you should send her the faerie terrarium.

    This exactly, tell her they are baby good luck faries and only work on babies.

    It does seem grabby though. I agree with the PP who said it's one thing to send out a "come see the baby" invite and a whole other to send our "this is where i'm registered!"

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  • lol!  Oh how I wish!  Unfortunately, I think the parts are too small to be safe around children.  DH and I were just talking about our little fairies this weekend.  I said it has been a year and now we can officially get rid of the thing.  :)

     I'm so glad I'm not the only one who thinks that this new trend of baby momma's throwing their own shower is a little odd.  I'm throwing my sister's baby shower in February and I wasn't even sure that it was appropriate for me to do that.  So many rules....

  • imagewittyschaffy:

    lol!  Oh how I wish!  Unfortunately, I think the parts are too small to be safe around children.  DH and I were just talking about our little fairies this weekend.  I said it has been a year and now we can officially get rid of the thing.  :)

    I don't know if you are doing the ornament exchange, but if you are, and I get you, I'm totally crafting you a terrarium ornament.

  • I've heard of having a meet-and-greet when a baby is born (and people generally bring gifts, but it definitely not a requirement nor should it be suggested/requested) but inviting people over for a shower and telling them where you are registered in the invite is definitely not appropriate.
  • imageKaren2905:
    imagewittyschaffy:

    lol!  Oh how I wish!  Unfortunately, I think the parts are too small to be safe around children.  DH and I were just talking about our little fairies this weekend.  I said it has been a year and now we can officially get rid of the thing.  :)

    I don't know if you are doing the ornament exchange, but if you are, and I get you, I'm totally crafting you a terrarium ornament.

     

    Alas, I am not.  My DH is a Christmas King and we have a crazy number of decorations.  If I participated, it would end up being another ornament we don't have room for on our giant Christmas tree!

  • imagewittyschaffy:
    imageKaren2905:
    imagewittyschaffy:

    lol!  Oh how I wish!  Unfortunately, I think the parts are too small to be safe around children.  DH and I were just talking about our little fairies this weekend.  I said it has been a year and now we can officially get rid of the thing.  :)

    I don't know if you are doing the ornament exchange, but if you are, and I get you, I'm totally crafting you a terrarium ornament.

     

    Alas, I am not.  My DH is a Christmas King and we have a crazy number of decorations.  If I participated, it would end up being another ornament we don't have room for on our giant Christmas tree!

    This is exactly why I am not partaking in the ornament exchange either... I have waaaay too many ornaments!

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