Okay, I'm not a regular on the board, but I just had to post this update. A while ago I posted a problem about my husband's (then fiance) sex drive. He had little interest in sex (including porn and masturbation) and it was causing a problem in our relationship.
I was advised by many that our relationship could not work with such mix matched sex drives, and some even told me to end it.
Anyway, I urged him to go to the doctor and get his testosterone checked. A normal testosterone range is from 170 to 800. At his age, he should be close to 800. His test came back at 107! He is now taking testosterone, and his sex drive is definitely improving. He's still pretty shy about initiating sex, but we've taken some big steps.
I'm so happy I decided to work through this and look at all the possibilities instead of just leaving him. Just goes to show that sexual problems can definitely be worked through, and it's not always a make or break kind of deal.
Re: Low sex drive
That was a smart move.
Glad to hear he's feeling better.:)
I am so glad I read this post! My husband of less than a year and I have always had mismatched sex drives, but it has gotten worse recently. I just blamed it on stress, but lately its bothering me more and straining the rest of our relationship! It's hard to feel good about yourself and your relationship when your advances towards your husband are continuously shot down!
Now I at least know that I can get something else checked out!
Glad to hear that there was a solution for this.
I had wondered (since men and women go through different cycles of harmone fluxuations ... at least, I think the men do as well) how two people can ever be well matched on their level of libido.
I've just been experiencing high levels of libido this year (much higher than previously in my life) and I've been given advice (on this board) that my harmones are in flux and it's normal, etc... So, if I had married a guy with a drive that matched mine a few years ago, we would now be miss matched now OR vise versa. So, I'm glad to hear that there is a possible solution.
I wonder what is normal testosterone range for women at different ages. I wonder if that might also contribute to my increased drive.
This is an issue I'm dealing with as well. I'm 37 (38 next month) and my libido has pretty much tripled since I met my husband 10 years ago. Unfortunately, he is also 38 and his drive nowhere near matches mine. He'd been tested for low testosterone in the past, and while it was low, it wasn't shockingly low. You know, high enough where I was just expected to "chill, already." Sigh.
If anyone happens to come back to this post-
I'm curious, how did you get your husband to go to the Dr.? I can't get mine to go for a cold, I can't imagine convincing him to go for this. (and he needs to)