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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
I don't want a party in my honor, am I nuts?
Hi ladies, So I've graduated from law school and passed the July bar exam. The Supreme Court swearing in ceremony is coming up in 2 weeks and my mom wants to throw me a party. My mom has been excited to throw my a party since I graduated law school this spring. I am grateful that she wants to do this for me but I really don't want it. I feel so bad and wish that I wanted it but I don't. The thing is that I HATE being the center of attention. I've tried so hard to rally and be excited about the party but each time I think of it, I just want it to be over. I guess I am posting for the purposes of venting and also for some opinion. Is this totally crazy?
Re: I don't want a party in my honor, am I nuts?
I don't think it's crazy. Would she be hurt if you talked to her and said that you weren't interested in a party and you'd rather she spent the money on herself or tell her she could buy you a ________ (suit, business cards...etc) if she feels inclined to celebrate you. Or maybe she'd rather take you and immediate close family to a nice dinner to celebrate.
Congratulations, that's definitely something to be proud of!
I hear you. I was not looking forward to being center of attention at my wedding. Seriously, I FREAKED OUT how crabby I was that my photos would turn out bad... did not like it. The reception was better because the limeline was slightly off ME.
I think the right design of the party could help. I hated my bridal shower with just women but LOVED the couples shower because it was a lot of us and it was more about everyone, not "us." Could you think about the elements that make you less nervous and tell your mom? (Like, maybe wine and cheese after 7pm, with some cupcakes... evenings may feel more get-together-y and less "We're at a formal party that is stiff and awkward!) If it's at your house or her house does that help your stess? Or maybe AT a restaurant where you've got your closed buds next to you and don't really have to deal with the others.
Maybe ask for something more low-key. your style. a nice dinner with a small group...
If you mom is like mine- she doesn't care if you don't want the party- she feels you deserve and is proud- she isn't trying to make you uncomfortable...
Have you just talked to her??
I know exactly how you feel, I hate being the center of attention. Like pp said, is there any way you can tell your mom you just want a small family dinner?
Congrats on your accomplishments!
Small celebration = great, fun, sincere, wonderful.
High school style open house = overwhelming, crazy, not necessary, awkward, everyone would ask you for legal advice! :-)
I think you have a right to be anxious. Communicate what sort of party/occasion you'd prefer and go from there!
And BIG CONGRATS!!!!!!