April 2010 Weddings
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I'm Back

Oh ladies, I can't even tell you the weekend I had. It was the most amazing, wonderful and heartbreaking weekend of my life.

It took us about 16 hours to get down to Virginia - HALF that time was spent in Virginia! It's amazing how big the state is.

The family was absolutely amazing. I have never met such an amazing family, it really made me realize why Nicholas was such an amazing person. He was unresponsive but he knew who we were which was amazing. They fed us and we stayed all day. We left for a bit to get a nunchuck for his brother (we were playing Wii all day with him) and got lost on the way back. Getting lost in the backcountry of Virginia with 1/4 tank of gas and at 9PM is NOT fun. We got back and took a nap before we left. When we left Nicholas' counts dropped dramatically and we think that his Mom knew it would be soon. They kept asking us to stay, part of me thinks it was because they knew it was going to happen soon. We weren't even out of Viriginia when we got the call. We almost considered turning back around but we didn't.

I was honestly in shock, I was shaking. Everything seemed to happen so fast, its amazing. I didn't get a good cry in until I got home. I collapsed into DH's arms and cried cried cried. I slept for 13 hours.

Unfortunately the wake is tonight and the funeral is tomorrow. I want to go so bad, but my company only gives out bereavement leave to blood family, which is bogus. There's a small chance that I may be able to make it to the funeral, but I'm not holding my breath.

Thanks for listening girls, and for your thoughts and comments throughout this time. It makes me feel better to get it out. I want nothing more than to be in Virginia right now but I can't and it breaks my heart. The two others that I went with are going today along with 2 other people from Camp.

I wish this never happened, but I'm glad I got to be with them, and I'm glad he's no longer in pain.

Re: I'm Back


  • How heartbreaking...I like to look at it this way: even though your time together was brief, you were blessed to be a part of his special short time here...you've had that wonderful privilege. I Will keep you and Nick's family in my thoughts and prayers...
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  • Crying

    At least you had an opportunity to be with him before God picked him up in his arms.  I'm sure he'll be an angel watching over you and so many lives he touched.

    Many hugs and prayers being sent to Nick's family and to you.

    ~Melissa~
    Shmel's Blog
  • I'm glad you were able to see him again and agree w/Stacy it was wonderful to be part of his life. I'm also glad your DH was there with you to help support you. I will continue to keep you and his family in my T&Ps. Left Hug
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  • Oh Amanda, I am so sorry for your loss. I am glad that you got to get down there and see him one last time, I am sure he knew you were there and I am sure the family appreciated you driving all that way.

    I will send my T&P's to all that knew that sweet little boy.

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  • :(  I'm so sorry Amanda, but glad you were able to see him one more time!
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  • I am so sorry to hear of his passing - life is so precious, especially that of a child and it's so unfair that children have to be taken so soon.

    Thoughts & prayers are with all the loved ones and I'm sorry you won't be able to be there with them to say the final goodbyes. We don't even get bereavement leave for aunts, uncles and cousins so I totally understand the bogus-ness.  But I know the family will understand and feel your presence in spirit. Being there with him for that short time has touched the lives of him and his family in so many ways and they will know you're thinking of them every moment of the way. 

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  • He sounds like such a special kid! Hugs to you and thoughts and prayers to you and his family and all those who knew him!
  • Thanks girls, you have no idea how much I appreciate it. I'm just so happy I could see him one more time.
  • Broken Heart

    I can't say it better than anyone else. So so very sorry for you, Nicholas' family, and everyone else that loved him so much. Crying

  • Hugs!  Lots of T&P to everyone that he has touched and I hope they appreciate how lucky they are to have known him (just like you said).
    ~Margaret (and Nick)~
    Post-Wedding Life Blog!
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  • Hugs! What a great gift that you got to see him one last time. T&P's to his family and to you, and all the people who were close to him.
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  • Crying I am so sorry for your loss Amanda. At least you got to see him one more time..
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  • I have tears in my eyes reading your post... so incredible and heartbreaking at the same time. I'm so glad you were there for the weekend and I'm sure you gave the family some comfort also. I'll be thinking of you and Nicholas' family.
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  • I was following all your posts on Facebook and am so glad you got to see him before he earned his angel wings.  I'm so sorry for your loss and am thinking of you and Nicholas' family. 
  • What a heartbreaking story - but it's so beautiful that you went there to be with him and his family.  My thoughts are with you...and he'll always be looking over you.
  • Amanda, my heart breaks for you.  I am so glad you got to see your "buddy" one last time.  I'm sure the family is thankful for your visit also.  T&P headed out to you and his family.
    Anniversary

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