Family Matters
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Am i still suppose to feel like this

this last week has been so stessful. it feels like months have gone by but its only been a week. last week my father had a mild stroke. he is doing so much better today. He was in the hospital for 4 days. the entire process has completely drained me. the doctors said if he would have waited any longer to get to the hospital he would not be with us today. although he's doing better it still feels like the life was sucked out of me. this has brought so many issues forward about my father that need to be addressed. none of us (my mom or siblings) are quite ready to address those things My husband said that is what happens when  you almost lose. has anyone has the experience of almost losing a parent. am i still suppose to feel stress and tired.

Re: Am i still suppose to feel like this

  • I think your husband is right, it is completely normal to still be feeling drained and unsettled. It is good you are able to talk with your husband about it.

    I hope things get better and I am sorry to hear about your father.

     

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  • I am sorry to hear about the recent events in your life. The good news is that your father is alive and recovering. I can't say that I have been in this situation, but it does make me want to call my parents and tell them I love them!

    You have been through a lot. I am sure you have had some sleepless nights as thoughts have wandered through your brain. When we stress, it is almost impossible to turn the brain off. It is no surprise that you are feeling emotionally drained.

    Although your family is going through a lot, you need to help focus their energy (whatever energy is left) in a positive way. This will help your father as well. Take care of yourself, because in order to be helpful, you need to be clear headed. Take some time for yourself and rejuvenate and make sure that you show your dad and the rest of your family how much you care about them.

  • Thank you for your well wishes. my nights have been very sleepless and i've been waking up with headaches. But not as much as last week.  We are very fortunate that he is still with us. I find myself poking him when I go to the house and he'll laugh at me and say I'm not going no where just yet. you are right i need to get it together and refocus on the positive. thanks again.

  • It's totally normal. Heck, my father had a massive stroke 21 years ago that paralyzed him and there are times when it still unsettles me. A new normal will ensue for everyone in your family. That's not necessarily a bad thing...

     

  • Just want to offer lots of thoughts and prayers to your dad. My dad is in the hospital right now too so I'm feeling pretty nervous and helpless myself.
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  • I just want to agree with the others that this is completely normal.  While I have not experienced this with a parent, we went through this recently with my grandfather.  He went in for his first chemo treatment for pancreatic cancer (nerve-wracking enough) and ended up spending a week in the hospital.  We almost lost him several times that week.  It really does change the focus of your family.  The key is make sure that focus goes to something good.  For our family, when something like this happens, we turn the focus onto eachother, making sure that every time we see eachother, we know that the others are loved.
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