I get along great with my MIL and fine with my SIL. I wouldn't say we're best friends, but we're good and since we all live in the same city, that's a good. I'm grateful for it.
MIL just called me and asked me if I wanted to come to see her neighbor's jewelry showing. Apparently she makes it and wants to sell. It's tomorrow at 1 (till 4, but SIL has a soccer game in the afternoon, so they want to go earlier). I work from 9-12 and my job's about an hour away, so if I were to want to go, I'd have to either leave a bit early in order to get there on time, or show up late.
I'm not interested in buying any jewelry. I'm allergic to silver, don't like most stones, and I'm happy with what I have. Plus, there's always that budgetary issue, isn't there? So if I were to go, it wouldn't be for the jewelry, it would be for the family and making nice. Not that I have anything to "make nice" for - like I said, we're all good.
What would you do?
ETA: One more thing. H is working today (busy for the holiday season) and so I won't see him at all till tomorrow late afternoon if I go. Weekends are "our time" but ... yeah, I don't know. The "good wife" wants to go straight home and spend time with the H, but the "good IL" wants to go and make an appearance at the jewelry thing. Which "good" trumps which?
Re: What would you do?
Tell your MIL you're allergic to silver and that you will be late because of work (both very good reasons), and I'm sure she'll understand. You're under no obligation to go, and I'm sure your MIL won't care if you say no.
Skip the jewelry show and maybe go to your SIL's soccer game
Ditto - just say "thanks but I have plans".
However, I don't feel you "have" to buy anything. I have the personality that if I really don'[t want anything, I'm not going to succumb to some unspoken peer pressure that I have to.
But yet.... you do know that expectation is tehre.
This isn't something I feel you have to do to be a "good IL".
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
I agree with this.
I disagree with this. If MIL finds out you were done working at noon, and *could* have made the party (even if a bit late), it could result in hurt feelings.
Simply say "Thank you for the invitation, MIL, but I'll have to turn it down this time".
Last updated 4/06/11
I'd leave work on time. Then I'd consider the possibility of going ... to buy two Christmas presents from the neighbor lady. One for my MIL and one for my SIL.
I like livinitup's idea of buying Christmas presents.
But that's only if you really would like to go. If not, then it's fine to say, "Sorry, but I don't think I can make it this time -- I hope you have fun!"
'Thanks for thinking of me, but it's going to be too close time-wise getting off work.'