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MIl will kill me
hi everybody,
need your help am so lost am soooo angry will DH and his mother.
My mil is so imposing herself in our relationship, apartment, expenses, future kidss....ooff i mean everything. She just wants that wherever we go she comes with us if not she says mean thiongs to me only when my DH is not there so its annoying.
When i tell him sometimes he accepts but later he says that i dont go out with her because I dont LIKE her. Truly i make such effort that she has nothing tio complainbut in vain.
She is divorces and i thought that she will be happy to see her son happy but no she is more jealous to see me happy and enjoying my real life.
Its just that she needs to know everythng about us, bcause when she finds out she will be angry and say that we dont tell her everything.
am sooooo fed us with this situation and want to goooo far far away
Please advise what to do????
Re: MIl will kill me
Agreed. It's not your MIL, it's your DH. You need to talk to him and lay down the rules. Whenever my MIL does something I disagree I tell my DH and he lays down the rule. You and your DH are a team, not your DH and MIL.
Agreed. It's not your MIL, it's your DH. You need to talk to him and lay down the rules. Whenever my MIL does something I disagree I tell my DH and he lays down the rule. You and your DH are a team, not your DH and MIL.
Yup.
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Surely you noticed this dynamic before you got married.
Two things you need to address:
1. Your DH doesn't have your back here. You and he need to get and stay on the same page about your boundaries in your relationship with his mother.
2. Don't complain to him about every little thing she does. Pick your battles. The fact that he's pulling the "you just don't like my mom" card tells me that she can't do anything that doesn't annoy you right now.
What's wrong with not LIKING her? I mean, you promised to love and cherish your husband. When did you promise the same for the woman who gave birth to him?
I think you have to stop explaining yourself to him and set some new expectations. No, it is not required that you LIKE her. And no, her current behavior does not invoke warm feelings. When someone is mean and demanding they don't get to be LIKED. Yes, you will be polite and curtious, but this is his relationship to handle, not yours.
You may have to make these points a few times before it sinks in.
This is exactly what I was thinking. Your H needs to grow a set and stand up to his mother.
Sara, Friend?
glove slap. I don't take crap.
Does your husband voluntarily hang out with people he doesn't like? I doubt it, so I don't know why he would think he has any right to expect you to do that.
It's so weird that he just changed like that after the wedding.