Newlyweds=same amount of sex before marriage

perkyperkins83 · November 2010

I'm sure couple is different but when we first started dating, sex was all the time. Now its dwindled to the Sunday morning special and sometimes every other Sunday morning special. Should I feel concerend about this? I mean it doesnt bother me. Since we got married, we have a lot of special moments together like calling me wife or calling him husband. We are very much in love but should I instigate more to keep it different? Should I be worried? Neither one of us are bothered by it so is that OK?

Mrs. L

BayleeY · November 2010

Everyone is different.. and if both are okay, I say that is great! If you however start wanting more.. or he does.. then it's something that should be discussed. But if you're both happy.. that's what's important!

(Also, it is fun to say husband and wife huh? )

carcrashheart · November 2010

i just want to point out that it's only been 3 weeks...i think you're going to be just fine.

perkyperkins83 · November 2010

you are correct BUT we have "been together" for 3 years. Is being married supposed to be different?

summersweethearts2010 · November 2010

My DH and I were together 2 years before we got married in July and we had sex literally almost every day. Now it's about once every other week. I think it's normal for the sex life to dwindle down some after marriage. Plus, life is so different being married because we're both busy with work and school and are just happy being together.

Chrissichknlil · November 2010

Kind of going through the same thing. We have been together for 10 years, lived together for 2 and have been married 3 months. We have sex less now, then when we were dating. We have sex maybe once a week, but it doesn't really bother us until all the sudden we are like OMG it's been a while. We are very much in love, but for some reason it just isn't a big priority. I don't think it's a bad thing, it's just getting adjusted to married life. We really enjoy it when it happens. If it feels right for you two, that's all that matters.

carcrashheart · November 2010

any relationship goes through spurts and lulls.

annieu613 · November 2010

When H and I first got back from our honeymoon I don't think we had sex for a week! Now we go through spurts of every night, or there have been weeks where we've only had sex once or not at all. You're coming down off the wedding high, and you're probably exhausted. You said neither of you minded your current arrangement, so why are you worried? If you want sex, initiate it more, but if you're both happy, why change anything? It's really up to you as to what you're comfortable with.

whiiiiiiitney · November 2010

i agree. everyone goes through lulls and spurts. we have had moments where we are so busy in our every day lives, that you kinda, er, forget to.

or hell, by the time you everydays are gone, you just wanna go to BED!

dont freak out. and if it bothers you, just MAKE A POINT TO. because with us, once we actually say, "hey, get your ass over here" we end up with a spurt of everday for a week or two.

futuremrsmagnan · November 2010

It's more than okay, Mrs. L! I am right in the same boat as you. I think it's because DH and I lived together for nearly 4 years before we were married. Yes, back in the day, we were all over each other and overtime it dwindled down just like you explained. Now, we are married and we are having sex just as much as before we were married. It's not a rare occasion, but it's not as much as most newlyweds do the deed, I am sure.

Bottom line, if DH and you are happy with your sex life, then don't change it. If you feel the need to have more sex, then tell DH about it. Make sure there is always that open communication. Good luck! :-)

Also, you might be so much like me that the moment you try to decide to have a baby (which for me isn't for another 2-3 years), you will be all over each other again... and then while you are preggers, it will be CRAZY... since that chance of getting pregnant isn't there anymore. Haha.

Minimax052910 · November 2010

I don't think its the marriage that causes this. It's the length of relationship you've been with your husband. I've been with my husband for 5 years and we've been married 6 months. For the first two years we had sex daily, sometimes even 2 or 3 times a day! Now we've gone down to 2-3 times a week. But the whole slowing down thing started years before we got married. It's not the marriage life that changed everything, it's the length you've been with your significant other.

futuremrsmagnan · November 2010

Minimax052910:
I don't think its the marriage that causes this. It's the length of relationship you've been with your husband. I've been with my husband for 5 years and we've been married 6 months. For the first two years we had sex daily, sometimes even 2 or 3 times a day! Now we've gone down to 2-3 times a week. But the whole slowing down thing started years before we got married. It's not the marriage life that changed everything, it's the length you've been with your significant other.

Totally agree!!!

Mrs.Rad888 · November 2010

carcrashheart:
any relationship goes through spurts and lulls.

He he.

Spurts.

Apparently I am a 15 year old boy.

justthetwoofus0509 · November 2010

yeah, the amount of sex we had changed after we got married...we started having it.

jpirrung · November 2010

The amount of time definitely changed after we were married...we've been together a total of 3 years now. We tried to have sex every time we got together before and then when I moved in right before we got married and now it's like once a week. My husband is constantly on me about it, almost every day. I think he thinks we are supposed to have it every night now that we are married and he has two teenage daughters that live with us full time? I'm extremely uncomfortable with even the thought of them hearing us! Its just not the same with kids around and he insists it makes no difference. It's actually starting to become annoying that he brings it up constantly! Sad

bmorstar · November 2010

I've actually talked with my husband about this. I just wanted to make sure he wasn't wanting more. We both came to the conclusion that when we used to have sex almost everyday that it was fun, but now when we have sex about once a week or every other week that it is AMAZING!! LOL so it's a quality over quantity thing for the both of us.

I hope that helps :-)

moonage · November 2010

So glad it's not just me... for some reason I had this idea that we were supposed to be doing it twice a day after the wedding and I felt like there was something wrong with us as a couple if we only did it once a week (or less)... but when it happens, it's AMAZING! So I think I agree, it has become quality over quantity. I wonder if that will change when we start trying to have a baby though. Once a week probably isn't going to cut it then!

Newlyweds=same amount of sex before marriage

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