April 2010 Weddings
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
What would you do?
As you know, my mom's surgery is early Monday morning (she has to be there at 5:30am). I want to be there so I can visit with her before the surgery. However, my aunt called last night telling me that she wants to be there, but can't do the 5:30. She asked if I would take her (since she is afraid to drive in the dark and afraid of driving somewhere that she is unfamiliar with) so that we would get there at 7am (the time of my mom's surgery. I really want to be selfish and say if you want to go, you have to be at my parents' house at 5:00 so I can drive you. At the same time, if I don't take her, she will complain about it forever, complain to my dad, and I will catch it from both of them. I am supposed to call her back Sunday night telling her which way...
This is really upsetting me.
What would you ladies do if you were in this situation?
This is really upsetting me.
What would you ladies do if you were in this situation?
There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under heaven. - Ecc. 3:1
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Re: What would you do?
YOU won't be causing the drama, your aunt will. Your mother's feelings are more important than your aunt's. My sister had a major surgery last year, and I didn't make it to the hospital before she went into the surgery (it was early morning at a hospital 2 hours away), and although all turned out okay I still regret that.
Maybe you can ask her to help prepare some meals or something?
TTC #1 since 4/10, Dx: MFI IVF planned for April/May
When I was 14 I was quite the little brat, and would not get out of bed in time to see my grandpa before his surgery. He (b/c of his age) had some complications and didn't make it. I regret that to this day, and regret that my sister (who had to drive me) was late also.
I'm not saying that to scare you b/c I'm sure your mom will be TOTALLY fine, but the point is that you are being the reasonable, caring one by wanting to see your mom before hand, and it's not wrong of you at all to be firm about that decision, and not let anyone else's issues take that away from you.
I agree with everybody else on this one. Especially the part where you won't be the one casuing drama, SHE will. Tell her you want to be there with your mom when they take her in for the surgery, partly so she doesn't have to sit in the waiting room by herself, and that if she wants to drive there when it's light out, she'll be there when your mom comes out of surgery.
That, or put her big girl pants on and drive in the dark. :-) Sorry, but you shouldn't have to schedule the morning around her.
Yeah it makes more sense for you to be there before the surgery. There is no reason that she can't meet you early and go with you, sometimes you have to suck it up for the people you love.
I will be thinking of you guys on Monday morning. Don't let your aunt get to you, you are doing what is best for your Mother.
THIS! Be with your mom - that's the most important place for you to be. Let your aunt figure it out herself, she's a big girl. And once your mom is home recovering, there will be plenty of things she can do to help (cook, clean, keep her company when you can't be there)
I agree with everyone else, you should be with your mom. And you will not be the one causing drama, your aunt will be the one causing drama. And what a horrible time for her to be selfish like that, this is a time when everyone should be thinking of your mom and doing what is best for her, not being catty. And how awful to be waiting to go into surgery alone.
I would ask her to help with some meals, some housework or whatever errands need to be run. Put her to work to make things easier on your mom once she is home.
This Exactly!! Go be with your mom before surgery!
Shmel's Blog
Great advice!
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