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So mad
We went bowling with our friends on Sat night who just had a baby last summer. They don't get out as much anymore since they also have a 3 year old, so it was a fun night.
The girlfriend and I aren't super close, but her boyfriend is my H's best friend from childhood. He was in our wedding too, so we get thrown together a lot. She likes to party and was drinking on Sat night. Whatever, that's her choice. She also happens to weigh about 100lbs, so she got tanked pretty fast.
We ended up going back to their apartment to watch a movie. She was so drunk by then that she was spilling her drink (like she needed more) and could barely talk. Somehow though, she managed to get me alone and proceeded to tell me that her boyfriend cheats on her all her the time and has been hitting her. She even said one night he strangled her.
So I go off on her telling her she doesn't have to stand up for that, they're not married and she needs to leave him. I told her to call our local Women's Advocates group, and that she can come to our house with the kids whenever she needs too. She gave me all these excuses, and then said that she told my MIL about it and MIL told her to stay with her boyfriend for the kids.
That totally threw me for a loop, because I know my MIL would absolutely never say that. So the next day I told MIL about it and of course she says this is the first she's heard of it. So she asks my BIL, who is good friends with the boyfriend too. BIL says that the girlfriend tells people that all the time when she gets drunk to get attention.
What!?!? That makes me so angry! I totally believe that knowing the dynamics of their relationship, and I honestly don't ever see the boyfriend hitting her. He can be kind of a jerk, but I don't think he'd take it that far. So now I feel like I was played, and that I can't trust her anymore. Actually, I want to slap her the next time I see her and ask her how dare she can make those kinds of accusations. That's ridiculous.
So thanks for reading this far if you've made it all the way through.
Re: So mad
Whoa.
If that girl is telling the truth, poor poor thing to be in that situation.
If she is lying, she has some serious issues she needs to work out.
I would be angry, also.
this
Are you going to tell her BF that she is saying these things? I would seriously consider this.
The girl who cried wolf... I really hope for her sake that there isn't any domestic abuse in their relationship, and I especially hope it never escalates to the point there would be because no one will believe her if it does.
How old is this gf? At what age do you stop getting falling down drunk? I mean, I'm a bit of a party pooper but I don't even think it's fun to get that wasted. I'm more of a "drink 'til it's safe to karaoke" kinda gal.
I agree... if Clint was getting wasted and telling people I beat him I would want to know. You never know when she'll tell someone who will do her the favor of 'getting her help' and getting him in trouble.
I'd tell her off. She does that to get attention when she's drunk?! Like her stumbling through words and spilling drinks isn't enough attention?!
I'd be livid. And I probably wouldn't talk to her again next time you guys all get together. Good gracious.
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I think she's 24. She had her first when she was 20, turning 21, so I think she feels like she never got to "be young". Whatever, that's a whole different can of worms.
I don't really want to say anything to the BF, just in case she is telling the truth. I don't want to make it worse for her, you know? I figured I'd just keep my eyes and ears open.
On the other hand, it will be difficult for me to trust her now. The bf is constantly pushing us on each other because he wants to be "couple friends" and be somewhat normal. They both like to party a bit more than DH and I do though, so we usually opt out unless it's something like bowling (rare). But we get put together a lot, so like I said, I'll just keep my eyes and ears open.
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What a flucked up situation. You're damned if you do and damned if you don't.
Wow. What a mess. Makes me very sad that there are children involved in this as well. I really hope she is making up for attention for that sake, but she needs to grow up fast. I'm sorry you didn't have your "party" years, but you made the choice to have those children and they deserve better than that.
Wow. What a mess!
ETA: I hate it when I reply what I just read and think it was an original thought.
Wow... yeah.
Well, there are all together too many people who are abused and do need help. And there are all together too many people lying about being abused and crying wolf... and doing their share to prevent legitimate victims from getting help. Which sucks, to say the least.
For her sake, I hope she's not actually being abused.
For the sake of real DV victims, her lying about it is horrendous.
Obviously, none of us knows her and can know what you should believe.
For what it's worth, in my 21 or so years of experience with DV... most (not all, but most, so don't take this as any huge piece of evidence) abusers wouldn't encourage their vicims to have friends. Usually they try to sheild their victims from having friends because friends = support system. Support system = less likely victim.
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