September 2008 Weddings
PBJ63010
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Random Question
Because of something I saw on another board... Nothing going on in real life here.
If your DH was caught cheating - texting/emailing with another woman (and by texting/emailing I mean inappropriate conversations and pictures of the woman in nothing but underwear/bra) would you continue with your marriage and try counceling? Or would you say there is no way this is something we can fix?
Lets say it got no further than texting and emailing.
Now lets say there was physical cheating as well as the emails.
Re: Random Question
In either situation, we would try counseling for sure.
I'd would forgive him but it would take a long time to regain trust.
I honestly think this is one of those situations where you just don't know what you'd do unless you were in that situation.
I'd love to say that we would work through any bump with counseling before calling it quits. And then you often say, but if he is cheating, there are no 2nd chances, I could never trust him again etc etc. I really think that no matter what I think I'd do, what I actually do may be different if I were actually in that situation. Does that make sense?
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I'm very torn...
First scenario I think for sure that I would be more open to counceling than the second. But I also feel this is something I couldn't know 100% how I would react until I was in the situation.
I do feel that the 2nd situation would be more of a not going to work it out kind of thing but again who knows.
I know someone (mentioned in my post below) whos hubby has cheated and I wonder if she doesn't realize it or if she just pretends it doesn't happen. 'Cause if I knew it was going on there is no way that I would be able to pretend it wasn't.
We've both agreed that if we hit a rough patch in our marriage we will go to counseling, no matter what the issue is.
Of course, that's easy to say now while everything is happy. I hope that if anything like that ever did happen we'd still choose to at least try to make it better through counseling.
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This hard for me to even imagine. I honestly cannot fathom M doing anything like this.
I did date someone that was doing this. Not pictures... b/c well I think then text messages were just starting. I stuck with him, I believed his lies and when we broke up, I swore I'd never put up with that behavior again. So really I don't know what I'd do.
I used to think cheating was the end of a relationship... but the more I think about it, it isn't black or white. I think counseling is essential but the end result is trust. You have to have that trust and I think that's hard to earn back once it's been lost (and you've been hurt).
It's really hard to say what one would do in any situation. I think the situation changes when children are involved as well.
my guy reaction is no, since I've been on the wrong (if there is such a thing) of that situation and am sort of of the belief cheaters never change.
but in the context that it never fully progressed.....and in the context of my current relationship/marriage...I am 99.9% sure I'd go for counseling.