September 2008 Weddings
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Poll: "Stealing" baby names
I'm just curious to see what everyone thinks! (Emily's post made me think of this.)
Would you use a name that another friend/family member has said they want to use? (let's assume they aren't pregnant)
Would it make a difference if it was a family name or one with a lot of significance vs just one they liked?
What if they just mentioned it in passing?
On the flip side:
Would you be offended (or consider it name stealing) if a friend/family member used a name you said you wanted to use? (assuming you aren't pregnant)
What if it was a family name or one with significance or one you just like?
What if you mentioned it in passing vs saying you actually wanted to use it?
Re: Poll: "Stealing" baby names
Glad you posted this. When I found out my sister was PG, I was hoping she would have a boy. If she had a girl, I knew she would get first "dibs" on naming her after our mom. Well, she had a girl and she chose my mom's name as my nieces middle name. At first, I was hurt but now I am fine with this. If and when we have a girl, our daughter will be named after my mom.
If we have a boy, we will name him after DH's grandpa.
If you have your heart set on a name, I would go for it. I know many couples who pick a name and when they see their LO for the first time, they change their mind!
Would you use a name that another friend/family member has said they want to use? (let's assume they aren't pregnant) Honestly it depends on who said it. My cousin (the one who miscarried at 20 weeks while I was pg.) always has wanted to name a girl Ellie and even though until B was born it was my fav name I was having a hard time if i were to choose that.
Would it make a difference if it was a family name or one with a lot of significance vs just one they liked? it might make a difference
What if they just mentioned it in passing? I probably wouldn't care
On the flip side:
Would you be offended (or consider it name stealing) if a friend/family member used a name you said you wanted to use? (assuming you aren't pregnant) again it depends on who it was.
What if it was a family name or one with significance or one you just like? I would be more upset if it was a family name
What if you mentioned it in passing vs saying you actually wanted to use it? mentioning it I don't think you have anything to be upset about but saying that is what you will name your child and then they (again depending on who it is) use it I would be more mad.
Ex: Sissy naming Chance I LOVED Chase for a boy but they are so similar I wouldn't even do it because she was having a boy first. I know it isn't the exact same as your talking about but its close. haha
Would you use a name that another friend/family member has said they want to use? (let's assume they aren't pregnant) No, unless it was somebody who I talked to once a year or just saw the name on FB or something. Then maybe, but still probably not likely.
Would it make a difference if it was a family name or one with a lot of significance vs just one they liked? I don't like/wont do family names, so no.
What if they just mentioned it in passing? I'd ask them first if it was somebody close to me. Ex, "Hey so-so, was that a name you'd really want to use or were you just tossing it around?"
On the flip side:
Would you be offended (or consider it name stealing) if a friend/family member used a name you said you wanted to use? (assuming you aren't pregnant) Yes, but just because the only people I would tell names to would be people who would be too close for our kids to have the same names (siblings, closest friends) and you ladies. Everybody knows what names we'd use, anyway, so they've had plenty of advance warning that Aubrey and Owen are ours :P
What if it was a family name or one with significance or one you just like? Again, wont do family names so that isn't an issue. If it was one of the above mentioned names, I'd be pretty irritated.
What if you mentioned it in passing vs saying you actually wanted to use it? Eh, then I wouldn't care as much. Again, as long as it wasn't Aubrey or Owen!
I felt like this about our first dance song and changed it because a friend used it in her wedding which was before mine, after I'd told her I was going to use the song.
I have a cousin who has a son named Caden, and a 2nd cousin with a son named Aden. However, this is not stopping me from wanting to name my 1st son Jayden. I guess if it was my brother who had used a name so similar it would be different, but because they're cousins, I really don't care...and the names are slightly different. Another cousin of mine just named his son Joshua, which is a name I love and would be a 2nd choice for me...however, I don't know that I'd use it now...
One of my BFFs and I always loved the name Olivia...we said that whoever had a daughter first could use it. Well her daughter, Alivia, is now 4.
I won't be using that name.
I guess it just really depends on what the name is and what the significance is to me.
Would you use a name that another friend/family member has said they want to use? (let's assume they aren't pregnant) Like Paige, I think it would depend on the situation.
Would it make a difference if it was a family name or one with a lot of significance vs just one they liked? I definitely wouldn't use it if it were a family name or something with significance that a friend or family member mention they wanted to use. I don't know what I would do if it was something they just mentioned they liked.
What if they just mentioned it in passing? I don't think I would care.
On the flip side:
Would you be offended (or consider it name stealing) if a friend/family member used a name you said you wanted to use? (assuming you aren't pregnant) Again, I think it depends on the question below.
What if it was a family name or one with significance or one you just like? I wouldn't care if it was something I said I liked. If it was a family name, I might think it's a little strange but I don't really think using a name someone else likes is really "stealing."
What if you mentioned it in passing vs saying you actually wanted to use it? I wouldn't care.
2012 Reading Challenge
Family member, no. Friend, maybe. Depends on how close we are.
When we were expecting Patrick, we had a clear favorite girl name, but a list of 4 or 5 boys names. One of the names on the list is a name my SIL loves (I found out from my MIL; SIL would never say anything because she wouldn't want to upset anyone). We immediately crossed it off the list. I would have felt really bad if we chose it and found out after. However, it kind of doesn't matter, because the first boy will be named after her husband, so they might not even ever use it anyway.
On the flip side - I would have been really upset if SIL (a different SIL, not the aforementioned one) used our girl name for her daughter. I may not have a right to be upset, though, but I probably would have been. Probably because we didn't find out the sex before P was born, so I had a lot of months getting attached to that name.
My ex had a boy name picked out he loved, but his best friend used it for his first son. I have no idea if Ex will still use it if he eventually has a boy, but he got over it.
2012 Reading Challenge
Would you use a name that another friend/family member has said they want to use? (let's assume they aren't pregnant) Possibly...depends on the name and how close the friend is, I wouldn't for my sis or DH's sisters though. Luckily the girl name my SIL has picked out if they ever miraculously got pg again is one that I would never use.
Would it make a difference if it was a family name or one with a lot of significance vs just one they liked? Yes, I actually have a 1st cousin and a 2nd cousin both named Nicolas, after an uncle that passed away right before both of them were born. It wasn't a big deal at all, it was a sweet tribute to my uncle. It probably helped that our family rarely saw those cousins since they lived far away.
What if they just mentioned it in passing? Wouldn't matter at all, pretty much whoever gets the baby first gets the name, that's how I feel anyway.
On the flip side:
Would you be offended (or consider it name stealing) if a friend/family member used a name you said you wanted to use? (assuming you aren't pregnant) Nope, as I said above, whoever gets a baby first, gets their pick of names.
What if it was a family name or one with significance or one you just like? Nope. DH and I have decided that our middle names will be passed on as middle names since both of ours were passed to us. Since they're are significant to us, I don't think we would care if someone used the name before we did.
What if you mentioned it in passing vs saying you actually wanted to use it? Still nope. I guess this isn't something I really have a vested interest in right now and I don't have names for our hypothetical future childrent anyway so I'm not really attached to any.
DH's cousin has 3 children: Chase, Chesney (girl), and Chance.