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Someone dropped something about "sexual annorexia"

But don't worry, I found it and decided I'd help you out!

Sexual Anorexia!......Read all about it!!

I have noticed SO MANY women talking about the lack of sex and initiation of sex from their husbands. I was watching "Strange Sex" on TLC a couple of months ago and they started talking about a married couple that rarely had sex....because the HUSBAND never wanted to. Everything he was saying sounded like MY husband. That was when I first heard the term, "Sexual Anorexia." Yes....weird name, I know. I looked it up online and was relieved, actually. Relieved because I have been torturing myself for the past 5 yrs. of my marriage wondering what the problem was. Our relationship has been like this from the beginning. It's just the way my husband is or has became. My husband tells me over and over again, "It's NOT you....I love you." And I believe him. He begged me to be with him for about 3 or 4 yrs. before I finally gave in lol. I KNOW he loves me. Hearing about this problem lifted such a huge weight off my shoulders. I'm still not 100% sure that this is actually his problem, but it SURE sounds like it could be. If you are in the same boat I am in, it might be worth your time and sanity to do some research on it. Someone actually even wrote a book regarding the subject. So, I guess there are quite a few men and women who suffer from this. Problem is....when one partner suffers, both partners suffer. It's hard to deal with at times. But, I meant my vows and I love my husband for better or worse. I'm sure a lot of you ladies out there feel the same way. Hey....at least he's not running around on you. -Trust me girls, it could be worse. Hopefully this will ease someone's mind out there. Good luck to all of you that know what I am talking about!  Stick out tonguehttp://www.asylum.com/2010/08/23/sexual-anorexia-cory-schortzman-dr-patrick-carnes-sexhelp/
 

11-21-2010 at 3:32 AM
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SugarLoafB...
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Relieved?  Um, sexual anorexia usually involves a lack of ability to be emotionally intimate.  If that's truly the case, then the husband should get some counseling, because lack of intimacy can easily destroy a marriage.  There's a difference between low sex drive (due to stress, poor diet, loads of outside factors) and sexual anorexia -- one is mostly circumstancial, the other is an emotional disorder.
 

11-21-2010 at 11:07 AM
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shadesofbr...
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My ex was like this. I'm not sure why you find this relieving at all. I guess maybe I'd be relieved if he was going to counseling with you and you were seeing an improvement in his ability to be intimate and initiate.
 

11-21-2010 at 1:03 PM
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Caracie30
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Hey, idiots.....I believe I said this was for people who are currently going through what I am going through. I am RELIEVED because it's not just him being an *** and it's not something that I have done. It's an actual problem. You think maybe you can understand that?? I swear, this board is WAY too harsh at times. -Not that you have made me cry or anything, but Jesus.....if you aren't here to actually try and help someone out, then save your crappy comments like that for Facebook, you immature jerks.

I'm sure that the girls out there that have been racking their brain like I have would ALSO be RELIEVED....not happy.....but RELIEVED to discover that maybe their husband has an actual problem and that it can be dealt with. Maybe he is suffering right along with you. You can't fix something until you know what the problem is. This board is for already sensitive subjects. No one needs to hear someone talk trash about what they are going through. It's called decency. -Get some.

 

11-21-2010 at 1:35 PM
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TarponMono...
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There are many asexual couples out there. If this is what suits them and they're both fine with it, why not?

Say what and come again? you dated for 3 or 4 years with no sex at all? He had to beg you? That doesn't sound healthy to me.


test test 

11-21-2010 at 2:09 PM
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Caracie30
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No, lol...what I meant was that he begged me to be with him, as in I was single and he was single, but I never gave him a shot because he was on drugs at the time and I did not want to be involved with him while he was being stupid. This was 10 yrs. ago. Just a boy being a boy I guess. He's been clean since I have been with him.

I'm not ecstatic or happy with our sex life, but, couples have issues and this is just one of them that needs extra attention. We have a great relationship.....I know that sounds weird, it's hard to explain and I guess it's hard for people to understand. But you know, I'd rather him have this issue vs. him being out with the guys all the time and getting into trouble. -And no, lol...I don't force him to stay at home with me all the time lol. He's just not your typical man. He like to stay home and hang out with me and play video games. I would take this situation over being married to a cheating dog any day. -I used to work at many different car dealerships....let me tell you....men are DOGS. I KNOW I found a good one and I will stay with him and help him sort this problem out to the best of my ability.

 

11-21-2010 at 2:38 PM
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carcrashhe...
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the cliche that men are sex hounds and women are prudes is so stereotypical. i know plenty of men that are perfectly happy with having sex once every 2 weeks or so, and it has nothing to do with any type of problem or medical issue. it has nothing to do with their SO, or anything really at all.

"If every tear we shed for you became a star above; you?d stroll in
Angel?s garden, lit by everlasting love."

"TTCAL buddies with danie330 & JulsW" 

11-21-2010 at 4:05 PM
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Motzie
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OP - go sell crazy somewhere else.

As for your article, I couldn't get past the picture of that dude. Sexual anorexia my ass. That pic just made my vag seal itself shut.

 

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Re: Someone dropped something about "sexual annorexia"

  • Since my response was not caught ill recap....

     

    Your H doesn't have sexual anorexia, he has a twaffle of a wife. Your lovely attitude and charming personality would be a turn off for any person in your presence.

    or

    Your lack of a good sex life has made you become a raging ***!



  • denial is a powerful thing.
    Blog: Not to be Koi

    Sara, Friend?
    image
    glove slap. I don't take crap.
  • Lol...hey Geek_girl, first of all, learn how to spell "anorexia", secondly, I am the person that dropped it.....me....the girl who wrote it. It became NOTHING but a bunch of bullshit. So why leave it out there?? I guess since I'm a "newbie" that gives you girls with NOTHING better to do a chance to get back at your childhood demons. I guess you were taunted as a child and since the internet isn't face to face interaction, it's fun and easy for PUSSIES LIKE YOU to be "the raging ***." Real cute. And no, I'm not a "twaffle of a wife." I'm a damn good wife. And my "lovely attitude and charming personality" is the reason my husband married me. I'm not your average woman that believes she is a princess that deserves everything under the sun.....like ALL of you are. I can be very understanding and helpful, but I can also turn into a *** that will say *** to you that will make you stroke out. I never joined a forum before, but if this is what it's going to be like, then forget it. I thought forums were supposed to be fun and HELPFUL. NOT critical of EVERY THING SOMEONE SAYS. NONE of you...and I mean NONE of you HAVE the problem that was ORIGINALLY the issue. The only reason ANY of you jumped on this bandwagon was to try and make someone feel like ***. Does that make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside? I deleted this post because all I tried to do was make some of the girls out there feel a little better about their shitty situation......IF IT APPLIED TO THEM. YOU girls are children. Drama queen children. You can't just grow up and shut your mouth when you need to. Is that why you are on here? To criticize? Because it's certainly not to help anyone out. Damn, just stfu. All of you have taken this to a REDICULOUS level. I dropped the bullshit.....and then YOU guys wanted to bring it back up. And you did. What does that say about yourselves? -Drama *** queens.
  • imageCaracie30:
    Lol...hey Geek_girl, first of all, learn how to spell "anorexia", secondly, I am the person that dropped it.....me....the girl who wrote it. It became NOTHING but a bunch of bullshit. So why leave it out there?? I guess since I'm a "newbie" that gives you girls with NOTHING better to do a chance to get back at your childhood demons. I guess you were taunted as a child and since the internet isn't face to face interaction, it's fun and easy for PUSSIES LIKE YOU to be "the raging ***." Real cute. And no, I'm not a "twaffle of a wife." I'm a damn good wife. And my "lovely attitude and charming personality" is the reason my husband married me. I'm not your average woman that believes she is a princess that deserves everything under the sun.....like ALL of you are. I can be very understanding and helpful, but I can also turn into a *** that will say *** to you that will make you stroke out. I never joined a forum before, but if this is what it's going to be like, then forget it. I thought forums were supposed to be fun and HELPFUL. NOT critical of EVERY THING SOMEONE SAYS. NONE of you...and I mean NONE of you HAVE the problem that was ORIGINALLY the issue. The only reason ANY of you jumped on this bandwagon was to try and make someone feel like ***. Does that make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside? I deleted this post because all I tried to do was make some of the girls out there feel a little better about their shitty situation......IF IT APPLIED TO THEM. YOU girls are children. Drama queen children. You can't just grow up and shut your mouth when you need to. Is that why you are on here? To criticize? Because it's certainly not to help anyone out. Damn, just stfu. All of you have taken this to a REDICULOUS level. I dropped the bullshit.....and then YOU guys wanted to bring it back up. And you did. What does that say about yourselves? -Drama *** queens.

    Hey caracie30, first of all if you're going to try and make fun of someone else for spelling something wrong make sure you don't spell something wrong too. It's ridiculous not rediculous.

    Second of all, you acting immature and throwing a fit while trying to tell people they're being immature kinda negates everything. You're welcome in advance sweetpea.

  • I used spell check and it didn't pick it up, so yeah, I'll laugh with you and agree with you on that one. Secondly, I'm not being immature. I am defending myself. -I'm so very sorry that I'm not going about it the way you would prefer me to. -With my head in the sand. Hopefully, this will be my last comment regarding this bullshit. I tried to throw something out there for women who might be going through a hard time. I was decent and kind about it. Every person that commented on it was either slightly rude or very rude and a smartass.....except for TarponMonoxide. So, think about this for a minute. How would YOU have taken it? How would it make YOU feel to try and help out someone that might be in pain and then just have a bunch of people jump in and make crappy comments about it? Why are any of you even responding to this post? Are you going through this? Do you have any helpful tips? No? ....Then leave it alone. This is a forum. It's not Facebook. This SHOULD be a place where people can go and have fun and ask for advice without getting criticized for it. Anything else said is just childish. If you can't see how the comments made by the other people were WRONG, then you are blind. Again, I'm not being childish. -When push comes to shove............. Do you guys really not see how you are acting? Is it just the fact that you are a woman and you enjoy this type of behavior? I'm a woman, but I don't enjoy being a crappy to someone unless they have been crappy to me first. I don't see why ANY of you have put in your two cents regarding this post. It wasn't about you or for you. You girls just saw it as an opportunity to act like bitchy women. And you did. And for what? What did you get out of it? ANY ONE OF YOU would have or SHOULD have reacted the same way I did IF the tables were turned. It's called defending yourself. But at this point, anything I say is just fueling your ego. Bottom line is this. It wasn't right. Plain and simple. I tried to be helpful and YOU guys tried to be hateful. There was no point in any of the crappy comments this post received. Like I said, I hope this is my last post. I really don't want to have to defend myself or repeat myself again. What you girls did was WRONG and this has just become a candyland of drama for you to feast upon. If you want to continue making crappy remarks regarding something that shouldn't even concern you, then go ahead. Waste your time. You obviously have nothing better to do anyway.
  • Actually, I wasn't trying to be rude -- I was pointing out that if sexual anorexia really does sound like your husband's problem, then there is another issue at play altogether that should probably be dealt with.  It's not just low libido, it's a serious emotional problem that requires therapy.  You didn't mention that facet of the disorder in your post, so I tacked it on.

    I hope you and your husband are able to work through whatever bedroom stuff is troubling you.  No one likes feeling like their sex life is tanking, and most of us on here can understand that. 

  • Like I said, I hope this is my last post.

    We all know better, that certainly won't be your last post. You need attention from somewhere why not here? You have so much anger built up inside you against your H and you are just projecting it onto other people. We can all see that. Does your therapist see it?



  • You know what?  My spellcheck didn't pick it up either.

    Anyway, that being said...

    I'm NOT a bully, I can assure you of that.

    I AM, however, the type of person who will call someone on their BS.  And you, my dear, are serving up a huge steaming pile of it.

    So, you think your H has "sexual anorexia".  OK, let's go with that.  Let's say, though, just for fun, he had diabetes.  Or cancer.  Or had already had a small heart attack.  Or hell, bad hair.

    Could you, in good conscious, sit idly by and watch your husband refuse help and treatment?  Wouldn't you encourage him to see that specialist, go take that round of pain in the arse tests, and generally follow doctor's orders so that he can live a long, healthy life?

    Or would you just sit there, pat him on the head and say "there there" while he's in recovery because he just had to have part of his leg removed because of diabetes?  Say "gosh, honey, I don't know why this happened"?

    My bet is that you would encourage someone you love to get help with their diagnosis, no matter how unpleasant it may seem.

    Furthermore, being OK with "being punished because you ask for love and attention" is utter BS.  I wouldn't, on my worst day put up with that from anyone.  So, really what this tells us is that you have really low self-esteem to tolerate this.  Even marrying into it when you could have walked away and said "I care for you, but I deserve better".

    So, why don't you tell your H that just like any other serious medical condition, he needs help.  If he refuses to get help so that you two can live long, healthy lives together you will take that message to mean that he is NOT interested in having a long life together and you can take action.

    I'd also recommend counseling for yourself to figure out why you're OK with allowing yourself to be treated like this.  You deserve more than that.  Everyone does.

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  • Madre de Deo, go get laid already.Confused
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