Sex & Romance
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Someone dropped something about "sexual annorexia"
But don't worry, I found it and decided I'd help you out!
Sexual Anorexia!......Read all about it!!
I have noticed SO MANY women talking about the lack of sex and
initiation of sex from their husbands. I was watching "Strange Sex" on
TLC a couple of months ago and they started talking about a married
couple that rarely had sex....because the HUSBAND never wanted to.
Everything he was saying sounded like MY husband. That was when I first
heard the term, "Sexual Anorexia." Yes....weird name, I know. I looked
it up online and was relieved, actually. Relieved because I have been
torturing myself for the past 5 yrs. of my marriage wondering what the
problem was. Our relationship has been like this from the beginning.
It's just the way my husband is or has became. My husband tells me over
and over again, "It's NOT you....I love you." And I believe him. He
begged me to be with him for about 3 or 4 yrs. before I finally gave in
lol. I KNOW he loves me. Hearing about this problem lifted such a huge
weight off my shoulders. I'm still not 100% sure that this is actually
his problem, but it SURE sounds like it could be. If you are in the same
boat I am in, it might be worth your time and sanity to do some
research on it. Someone actually even wrote a book regarding the
subject. So, I guess there are quite a few men and women who suffer from
this. Problem is....when one partner suffers, both partners suffer.
It's hard to deal with at times. But, I meant my vows and I love my
husband for better or worse. I'm sure a lot of you ladies out there feel
the same way. Hey....at least he's not running around on you. -Trust me
girls, it could be worse. Hopefully this will ease someone's mind out
there. Good luck to all of you that know what I am talking about! http://www.asylum.com/2010/08/23/sexual-anorexia-cory-schortzman-dr-patrick-carnes-sexhelp/
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SugarLoafB...
Joined on 07-09-2010
SoCal
1,397 Points
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Relieved? Um, sexual anorexia
usually involves a lack of ability to be emotionally intimate. If
that's truly the case, then the husband should get some counseling,
because lack of intimacy can easily destroy a marriage. There's a
difference between low sex drive (due to stress, poor diet, loads of
outside factors) and sexual anorexia -- one is mostly circumstancial,
the other is an emotional disorder.
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shadesofbr...
Joined on 01-23-2010
Midwest
11,764 Points
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My ex was like this. I'm not
sure why you find this relieving at all. I guess maybe I'd be relieved
if he was going to counseling with you and you were seeing an
improvement in his ability to be intimate and initiate.
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Caracie30
Joined on 11-12-2010
198 Points
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Hey, idiots.....I believe I
said this was for people who are currently going through what I am going
through. I am RELIEVED because it's not just him being an *** and it's
not something that I have done. It's an actual problem. You think maybe
you can understand that?? I swear, this board is WAY too harsh at times.
-Not that you have made me cry or anything, but Jesus.....if you aren't
here to actually try and help someone out, then save your crappy
comments like that for Facebook, you immature jerks.
I'm sure that the girls out there that have been racking their brain
like I have would ALSO be RELIEVED....not happy.....but RELIEVED to
discover that maybe their husband has an actual problem and that it can
be dealt with. Maybe he is suffering right along with you. You can't fix
something until you know what the problem is. This board is for already
sensitive subjects. No one needs to hear someone talk trash about what
they are going through. It's called decency. -Get some.
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TarponMono...
Joined on 01-14-2006
174,282 Points
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There are many asexual couples out there. If this is what suits them and they're both fine with it, why not?
Say what and come again? you dated for 3 or 4 years with no sex at all? He had to beg you? That doesn't sound healthy to me.
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test test |
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Caracie30
Joined on 11-12-2010
198 Points
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No, lol...what I meant was
that he begged me to be with him, as in I was single and he was single,
but I never gave him a shot because he was on drugs at the time and I
did not want to be involved with him while he was being stupid. This was
10 yrs. ago. Just a boy being a boy I guess. He's been clean since I
have been with him.
I'm not ecstatic or happy with our sex life, but, couples have issues
and this is just one of them that needs extra attention. We have a
great relationship.....I know that sounds weird, it's hard to explain
and I guess it's hard for people to understand. But you know, I'd rather
him have this issue vs. him being out with the guys all the time and
getting into trouble. -And no, lol...I don't force him to stay at home
with me all the time lol. He's just not your typical man. He like to
stay home and hang out with me and play video games. I would take this
situation over being married to a cheating dog any day. -I used to work
at many different car dealerships....let me tell you....men are DOGS. I
KNOW I found a good one and I will stay with him and help him sort this
problem out to the best of my ability.
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carcrashhe...
Joined on 06-01-2010
6,993 Points
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the cliche that men are sex
hounds and women are prudes is so stereotypical. i know plenty of men
that are perfectly happy with having sex once every 2 weeks or so, and
it has nothing to do with any type of problem or medical issue. it has
nothing to do with their SO, or anything really at all.
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"If every tear we shed for you became a star above; you?d stroll in Angel?s garden, lit by everlasting love."
"TTCAL buddies with danie330 & JulsW" |
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Motzie
Joined on 10-07-2008
98,269 Points
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OP - go sell crazy somewhere else.
As for your article, I couldn't get past the picture of that dude.
Sexual anorexia my ass. That pic just made my vag seal itself shut.
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Re: Someone dropped something about "sexual annorexia"
Since my response was not caught ill recap....
Your H doesn't have sexual anorexia, he has a twaffle of a wife. Your lovely attitude and charming personality would be a turn off for any person in your presence.
or
Your lack of a good sex life has made you become a raging ***!
Sara, Friend?
glove slap. I don't take crap.
Hey caracie30, first of all if you're going to try and make fun of someone else for spelling something wrong make sure you don't spell something wrong too. It's ridiculous not rediculous.
Second of all, you acting immature and throwing a fit while trying to tell people they're being immature kinda negates everything. You're welcome in advance sweetpea.
Actually, I wasn't trying to be rude -- I was pointing out that if sexual anorexia really does sound like your husband's problem, then there is another issue at play altogether that should probably be dealt with. It's not just low libido, it's a serious emotional problem that requires therapy. You didn't mention that facet of the disorder in your post, so I tacked it on.
I hope you and your husband are able to work through whatever bedroom stuff is troubling you. No one likes feeling like their sex life is tanking, and most of us on here can understand that.
Like I said, I hope this is my last post.
We all know better, that certainly won't be your last post. You need attention from somewhere why not here? You have so much anger built up inside you against your H and you are just projecting it onto other people. We can all see that. Does your therapist see it?
You know what? My spellcheck didn't pick it up either.
Anyway, that being said...
I'm NOT a bully, I can assure you of that.
I AM, however, the type of person who will call someone on their BS. And you, my dear, are serving up a huge steaming pile of it.
So, you think your H has "sexual anorexia". OK, let's go with that. Let's say, though, just for fun, he had diabetes. Or cancer. Or had already had a small heart attack. Or hell, bad hair.
Could you, in good conscious, sit idly by and watch your husband refuse help and treatment? Wouldn't you encourage him to see that specialist, go take that round of pain in the arse tests, and generally follow doctor's orders so that he can live a long, healthy life?
Or would you just sit there, pat him on the head and say "there there" while he's in recovery because he just had to have part of his leg removed because of diabetes? Say "gosh, honey, I don't know why this happened"?
My bet is that you would encourage someone you love to get help with their diagnosis, no matter how unpleasant it may seem.
Furthermore, being OK with "being punished because you ask for love and attention" is utter BS. I wouldn't, on my worst day put up with that from anyone. So, really what this tells us is that you have really low self-esteem to tolerate this. Even marrying into it when you could have walked away and said "I care for you, but I deserve better".
So, why don't you tell your H that just like any other serious medical condition, he needs help. If he refuses to get help so that you two can live long, healthy lives together you will take that message to mean that he is NOT interested in having a long life together and you can take action.
I'd also recommend counseling for yourself to figure out why you're OK with allowing yourself to be treated like this. You deserve more than that. Everyone does.