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Well, the holiday crazy with my mother has started!!!
One of the 1,000 reasons I do not "deal" with her has to do with the holidays. The woman can not deal with stress at all and she has a mild tendency to take it out on everyone else. Its appalling.
Anyway, apparently her side of the family decided to have Thanksgiving this coming Saturday. When she mentioned this to me, I told her right away we would not be coming. Ignoring the obvious (I don't want to be around her), my husband and I decided a long time ago that to have a happy holiday season it is best to do our own thing (hence the pajamas and Coors Light story of Thanksgiving 2009).
Email I received today:
Mom: can you bring rolls on Saturday?
Me: Um....we aren't coming. We have XXX on Friday, Bedlam is on Saturday, and we have SD on Sunday. Sorry!
Mom: Oh, I guess I can bring the rolls then.
Me: Yes, Cousin sent me several nasty texts about not coming but the fact of the matter is, we have plans that were made before this date was decided.
Mom: So, basically, they all knew you weren't coming when I told them you were coming.
Me: What? I never said I was coming.
Mom: Yes, you did. Several times.
*head desk*
This is also why I ONLY deal with her in email - because she has selective memory so she can pick a fight.
Re: Well, the holiday crazy with my mother has started!!!
Fuuuuuun times. She sounds like my MIL this year - she's mad that H isn't coming home for this apparent big Thanksgiving everyone's involved in [and we found out about the weekend before H moved]. And we told her in September that H wouldn't have leave for any holidays this year and wouldn't be back home until at least March. Whatever.
I can see more clearly why you and H celebrate Thanksgiving alone...
Thanks, lady. Three years ago I would have driven up there just to avoid a fight - its six hours ONE WAY - but not anymore. I think DH and I are entitled to enjoy the holidays. For God Sake's I am nearly 32 years old and I support myself. It finally dawned on me - other than picking a fight (the response of which I can control) - what IS she going to do? Ground me? Tell my boss to stop paying me? Egg my house?
Exactly. And I can tell you this, too - I guarantee you that your husband appreciates the way you handle it. When my husband sticks up for himself against whatever ridiculousness his mom has made up, it makes me so proud of him. It tells me that he is not willing to sacrifice our time just to appease someone that is behaving irrationally or being self-absorbed. I'd bet that your husband feels the exact same way.
this made me LOL
Sorry your mom is being a pill, but I don't blame you for not wanting to deal with it. I frequently think about how much more fun holidays could be if we just stayed home and skipped the drama.
this made me LOL
Sorry your mom is being a pill, but I don't blame you for not wanting to deal with it. I frequently think about how much more fun holidays could be if we just stayed home and skipped the drama.
As a child that was shuttled from celebration to celebration (I repeat, six hours one way), ditch the family and do something on your own. Your kids will appreciate.
My mom may be worse than your mom, so I definatelly feel for you. I won't even give her my email address, much less my physical address.
Oh, and I will never tell my DH about your pj's and Coors Light T-day, because he would be pissed to know that is an option!
I think if we were supposed to go from place to place to place we would, but H's only family is his mom and she doesn't care about seeing the kids ever (she hasn't ever met M and hasn't seen V since his first birthday) and my family all goes to my parents house so it is just once place. We just go there, eat dinner and call it good.
We did tell them last year though, that we were staying home for Christmas so they invited themselves all here. We had to try to politely tell them that wans't what we meant though
Good for you for standing up for yourself!
The holiday crazy with the in-laws started this weekend. They go all year without speaking one word to us snd then we get thrown together starting with my nieces b-day (last weekend) and it's all down hill from there. I found out the most vile, disturbing thing I've ever heard at a 5 year olds birthday party. Thanks to that little nugget of information, we are gonna pass on Thanksgiving with them this year.