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Meinschatz11
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
All these name posts...
So I've been taking a study break and ended up over on the FM board in the red-hot debate about taking/changing/creating a name when you get married. So just out of curiosity, what did you do and why?
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Re: All these name posts...
I go by my middle name, which has a whole slew of problems by itself. When I got married, I didn't want to make my middle name my first name cause it just didn't feel right. So now I'm Firstname Lauren Hislastname. I dropped the maiden name altogether, even though I only have one male cousin on that side of the family. DH and I never really discussed it other than whether or not I wanted to drop my first name and keep my maiden name.
FWIW, I don't think it's sexist to take your husbands' name, but that's just my opinion. I don't care what you do as long as I know what you want to be called.
Erin, what didn't your H like about your name?
I did not change my name in the past, it didn't appeal to me at all, I shuddered every time I thought about it. However, if I marry BF, I definitely will. I will be P&R maiden hislastname. I'm not overly attached to my middle name, so I'm happy to ditch it to make room for my maiden name, which I love. It's kind of weird, I want to get monogrammed everything, and look forward to stationary that says P&R & BF Hislastname. It really makes us seem like a family.
I have no problem with a woman not changing her name (duh), but I think the hyphenating can get a little silly, especially if you pass the hyphen to your kids.
So Timmy Jones-Smith marries Molly Miller-Thompson, so do they become the Jones-Smith-Miller-Thompson's? I know it's patriarchal, but passing just one name to your kids makes it easier. Or give them both names, but without a hyphen, like Timmy Jones Smith.
i'm hayley middlename hislastname. i have NOOO attachment to my maiden name, it's not like i'm breaking some big family line since there are literally only 4 (now 3) people in my fam with that name...dad is adopted, and his mom changed her name when she got remarried after his dad died.
and i am OBSESSED with my middle name...i loooove it. and it's my mom's middle name, and it will be my first daughter's middle name (if i have a girl, and NO I AM NOT PG).
the only thing i don't like is now my last name ends in es. so to pluralize it...it's eses. which is crazy.
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I'm still Myrealfirstname Middlename Lastname. I didn't change my name.
I love having my last name towards the beginning of the alphabet. It's also a bit unique. Plus, I am Trish Lastname; it's who I am.
An odd thing is that my crazy SIL still goes by Firstname Maidenname even though she's legally Firstname Maidenname BILS(andDHs)Lastname. They moved to a new town and knew no one....go figure. She doesn't keep it for professional reasons.
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This exactly, except my husband and dad couldn't care less.
This exactly, except my husband and dad couldn't care less.
I kept my name and said if/when we have kids I'll hyphenate. I'm published under my name and really, I just like it.
I am First Maiden Hislastname. However, professionally, I still go by First Maiden since a lot of people know me that way. I will eventually change my professional name though, using First Maiden Hislastname in the transition, and then just First Hislastname.
It doesn't help much that no one can pronounce my new last name.
I am first middle hislastname. I toyed with hyphenating our last names but my maiden is 10 letters and his is 7, so I didn't want to be signing my last name forever. The only reason I thought of doing that is because I have done a lot of my grad work under my maiden and still wanted it to be associated with me, but since I'm not published I've just been going back and adding my new last name to the work. I never thought about removing my middle name because I'm in love with my middle name. It's one that has been passed down on my mom's side of the family through the women for 4 generations and I want to pass it on to a daughter.
In the long run I'm still the same person I was with my maiden name, and completely agree with P&R, I feel like it makes us a family - I'm fairly traditional.
I'm Kat Maiden Married on my D.L. and PP. It made that 1st year of marriage easy for transitioning to have my maiden name on my I.D.
I was Kat SUPERcommonlastname prior to DH and ZOMG the issues I had from that. I know YouNeek names are a crappy thing to do to kids but super common names can suck too!
Call me Kat =^..^=
I changed to a hyphenated "double-barrel" last name when I got married - so Sara MiddleName MyLastName-HisLastName. I love all of my names and I didn't want to lose any of them, but didn't want to be an "orphan mom" with a totally different last name than my H and kids. The baby will have HisLastName only. I couldn't bring myself to saddle a kid with a hyphenated last name without a choice.
I personally thought I would feel more like family, with my husband, since we share the same last name.I have since changed me stance on the issue but it's too late now , LOL!!
Additionally, we travel out of the country on a pretty regular basis to visit family. I can't imagine the hassle of traveling overseas with our future children, especially under our circumstances, when I don't have the same last name as my children.
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I am Megan Maiden Married. I had no attachment to my middle name, so I dropped it. Plus, that's what my mom did
I actually really like my new last name, it has the same number of letters and same ending letters as my first. My signature is very symmetrical 
My SIL (brother's wife) kept her middle name (which is a family last name) and maiden name, plus added bro's last name. So now she is Megan(yep, we have the same first name) Lastname Lastname Lastname. It looks silly on her DL!
I am FirstName Middle DHLastName1. Since DH is from South America, he has 2 last names, but legally he is just LastName1 here in the U.S. If I were to follow latin tradition, I would be First Middle Married Maiden, but that's just too much. I love my new last name, and was very happy to be rid of my fathers name.
I am Lauren MyMiddleName DHLastName. When I was little (until I was 13 I think) I went by Lauren MyMiddleName. And MyMiddleName is a family name on my mom's and dad's sides of the family, so it always meant a lot to me. And I wasn't quite far enough into my career that I felt that it would hurt to make a change.
My maiden name was Irish - i.e. O'MyMaidenName. I tried to convince DH that we should both change our last name to O'DHLastName, but he didn't go for that.... go figure...
Me too! I just didn't want to change it. Although it is weird when people call DH Mr. Mylastname - that's my father!
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