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BoyMom21
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Please tell me your thoughts on this.
You're driving down the road and see a car with the back window covered in a stick-on.
It says:
RIP LILY FISHBURN 1967-2007 (made up name, obviously)
What do you think as you read it and pass by?
Re: Please tell me your thoughts on this.
Hah, I saw one of these this afternoon and was contemplating it.
I personally think there are better ways to express grief and/or honor a deceased loved one. I hate to say they're tacky since I understand why people might do that.... but yeah. Kinda tacky.
my bookshelf!
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Oh Ginger, I'm glad you said that.
I think it's tacky.
And then I think of what a prick I'm probably being...they're just trying to honor someone they love. Basically I feel like an a$$hole, but I can't help it.
I want to know--why don't you make a donation to a charity that gives to whatever caused them to die? (Cancer, military, drunk driving campaign, etc). How about you send a thoughtful card to the person's parents/family every year, or place flowers on their grave? I understand that everyone has a different way of grieving--but a bumper sticker? I don't get it.
H has one on the back of his car to honor his dad. We also donate to the American Cancer Society every year in his name. He says he has one because he and his dad bonded over their passion for cars, and he wanted something on the car his dad helped him alter to honor him and all he did for him.
But with that being said, I'm not fan. That's probably all I should say [edited out the rest].
Edit: I'm all for anyone honoring their lost ones in any way possible. My mom and her sisters are getting tattoos to honor the brother they lost in '07. We have shirts from his memorial service that I still wear. I don't want to offend anyone with my thoughts, so I'm sorry if I did. It's just not my style to do the car window thing - and I'll never knock my H for doing that. It's his dad, his call.
Kaylee & Cole 06.14.08
8/6/11 First 5k! OG&E Expo Run 34:47
9/3/11 Brookhaven Run 5k 34:18
9/17/11 Healthy Sooners Fun Run 5k 33:38
10/15/11 Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure 33:31
10/29/11 Monster Dash 5k 32:06 PR!
11/11/11 Veteran's Day Run 11k in Dallas 1:13:15 Instant PR!
1/28/12 Texas Half Marathon 2:38:03 Instant PR!
3/25/12 Earlywine Dash
I hope I didn't offend you.
I know that when H's best friend died whenever I was a senior in HS, everyone made those stick on things to put on the back of their cars. Most of them still have them on there. I totally understood it--but mostly thought it was an empty gesture.
Guess how many of the people with those damned stickers on the back of the car still send a card or put a call in to his parents? NONE. Seriously--no one! We make an effort to send a Christmas card and always invite them to things--our wedding, showers, baby shower, etc. (and how sad is it that the mother mentioned to another mom of the group AT one of our showers how she's sad none of his friends ever come around anymore...ugh)
No, no, no..... I guess my "tone" is hard to decipher online. I don't care for them either.
Let me put it this way: I have told my DH that I will haunt him if he ever chooses to memorialize me with a spray painted rock, a bumper sticker, a roadside memorial, or an airbrushed tshirt. They're absolutely NMS.
That said, who I am I to tell someone else how to grieve?
I am on-board with all of you. I am not a fan. But I've been on both sides of it. Had a friend pass away, helped make the "memorial" sign, and visited it regularly. On the other side, a year and a half ago my boyfriend passed away in an accident. Some people made a memorial for him at the sight. To this day, I have not been to the sight, or even know where it is. I just don't want to. So I really think it's just how some people mourn. I dread seeing them on the sides of the road.. it frightens me about the safety of driving. Ha. But while I think that they are NMS, I think that people just do things in mourning that they don't care is socially acceptable or not.