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The Santa Question
This question is mostly for the new mamas on the board, but non-parents can answer too...
What's your take on Santa? What are your holiday plans? What will you/won't you tell your kids?
DH and I argue about this a lot. He doesn't think "lying" to our potential future offspring sets a good precedent. I think it's innocent holiday fun. But then I just read a FB status update from a friend of mine who has a three year old. Apparently, the three year old is distraught over the fact that Santa won't be able to make it through the bolted grate they have over the front of their fireplace, so said FB friend is having her husband UNBOLT AND REMOVE the decorative grate before Friday.
Now, granted, I'd probably further the lie and say something like "Honey, it's okay, Santa is magic - he has a special way of getting around the grate," but even thinking that now makes me feel guilty.
My parents did the Santa thing with me and my brothers. I don't remember my brothers discovering "the truth," but I've got quite the story...I was four and apparently SCREAMED for my mother to come into the bathroom one day. She found me sitting on the toilet, deep in thought. When she entered, completely panicked, asking what was wrong, I turned and said "I just figured out that you and dad are Santa Claus." I apparently wasn't upset; she tells me I was actually extremely smug about being "so smart" to figure it out. Of course, then I went and told my entire kindergarten class the next year, which resulted in tears and parents being called and me being ostracized...but I managed to bounce back from it.
A friend of mine is taking the "we're not saying anything, we'll just answer questions" tact with his three year old. He said they don't promote it or encourage it or tell her it's true, but they won't deny her visiting Santa or talking about it or telling the story. He said if/when she asks anything, they tell her the truth or explain the history of it to her.
I'm curious what other people think they will/would do (or what they currently do)!
Re: The Santa Question
Bwhaha, I can't get over you ruined Santa for your class!
I want my future kid to believe in Santa for awhile... at least until the point it's not embarrassing. I want to cultivate and encourage my child's imagination and creativity and wonderment. Life since figuring out about Santa was a lot less joyous.
Lucy Elizabeth 10.27.12
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Pretty much exactly this... the Santa thing is fun - I'm not going to deny my kids that. They'll figure it out. I was 4 -- I got a puppy for Christmas and heard it barking in its crate in mom and dad's room long before Santa supposedly came. They tried to tell me some story about how the puppy and the reindeer wouldnt get along so Santa dropped it off early but I wasn't buying it. I was then sworn to secrecy so that I wouldnt ruin it for my little brother and sister.
HomemadebyHolman
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I think we finally decided to have one big gift from Santa, the rest from Mommy and Daddy. We'll talk about Santa and the magic of Christmas, but won't be threatening about Santa not coming if he's not good or anything like that. If Alex (or any future kid) asks point-blank if Santa is real, I'm not going to lie.
My FIL still talks about how he was traumatized when he found a Santa outfit in his father's closet and thought Santa had died.
Aww, how tragic!! Your poor FIL.
Lucy Elizabeth 10.27.12
Aww, these stories were so cute! So cute, SBS! I was the kid on our street who told everyone else how babies were made
My parents had to field some interesting calls about that!
I loved Christmas and the story of Santa when I was little. We are keeping the magic of Santa alive for our little ones. My dad and our neighbor even worked something out one year when our neighbor got up and ran around on our roof with bells. Our parents were right there with us so we knew it wasn't them. My brother and I about died from the sheer joy and tingling excitement of Santa and the reindeer being so close. I remember it like it was yesterday. To me, that's just freaking awesome, I don't resent them at all for 'lying.' I actually think it's pretty damn cool that they perpetuated our innocence.
We don't use Santa as a bribe or anything, but my kids are bad about coming into our room when they wake up in the middle of the night. I told them this year if they stay in their room, Santa says they can get the 'big kid' toy they asked for. LOL, well-I guess that's the definition of a bribe--nevermind! We are doing the one big present from Santa and the rest from us. They've been watching me buy, wrap and store these presents now for months, I'm not going to tell them Santa made them magically appear.
Colette, that story is HILARIOUS. All children do their deepest contemplating on the toilet.
I totally plan on keeping the spirit of Christmas/Santa alive with our kids. My parents did to an extent but they never really went out of their way. I want to do fun stuff and make some special memories for them! However, if they ask, I'll be honest. It's only fair.
Dx: MFI, unexplained recurrent miscarriages
IVF w/ICSI #1 (December 2010): m/c at 6w4d
IVF w/ICSI #2 (April 2011): c/p
FET #1 (July 2011): m/c at 7w3d
IVF w/ICSI #3 (October 2011- new clinic): BFP.
Lainey was born on June 13, 2012 via c-section at 37w3d!