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How to effectively kill your laptop
So in case anyone needs a good chuckle after the nonsense of today, I have a story I need to tell someone. Y'all know I've complained a couple times lately that my laptop is trying to ruin my life & I don't know why. I just got it over the summer, so it's not like it's old. It's just overheating & freezing up & pretty much crapping out on me. It wouldn't even let me sync my iPod this morning. So I finally got pissed earlier & asked DH to look at it. The following story is 100% true. I only wish I was cool enough to make something like this up.
My computer has a virus. It's outsmarted my anti-virus stuff, and while I don't know much about computers, this makes me think it's a bionic virus and I'm pissed. Where did I get said virus? Good question. Ready for this?
www.hollywoodtuna.com
Do not go there. Now to answer the obvious question, I have to go back a couple weeks. Somehow DH & I got talking about Lindsay Lohan. I casually mentioned that I've thought she's a skank ever since I saw her vag when she was climbing out of a car. DH was shocked & started laughing his a$$ off. He doesn't really know much of anything in the way of pop culture, so he had no idea it was apparently the cool thing for young Hollywood to go commando, climb out of a vehicle, and give the world a free hoo-ha show. I told him it was kinda common there for awhile. Paris did it, Britney did a few times, Christina maybe... He seemed to think I was making it up. Surely no one could be that skanky he though. So I'm on a freaking MISSION to prove to him that the lady-parts parade of like, 2005, was NOT in my imagination. I googled "Britney Spears vag," (still in my search history apparently, haha), and ended up at HollywoodTuna.
Moral of the story: Don't go trolling the internet for Britney's cooter. You may need a new laptop.
ten-tenners' may siggy: me & mama on my wedding day
What's LittleMissNewlywed Cooking?
Re: How to effectively kill your laptop
Favorite parts of this post: vag, hoo-ha show, lady parts parade, and the fact that there's a web site for hollywood hoo-ha lmao.
Download Kaspersky antivirus if you can, it's pretty bad ass. Joe fixes computers for a living if you need further anti-hoo-ha assistance :O)
Haha. I love it.
PS: Don't judge random bush - like there are no accidental photos of your vagina on the Internet?
This is why I missed you being the the boards!
Also- I told my DH about this post bc I was laughing, and he goes "I've heard of that site- but I don't use it." haha
There's a Britney Spears STD joke buried in there somewhere. And I don't mean Save The Date.
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I'm clever enough to hide my face.
And seriously, who doesn't know how to exit a vehicle without going all commando-spreadeagle?! Clinton thought it was hilarious. I asked him what he would think if it was Ryan Reynolds (my other husband) getting out of the car with ripped jeans & no underwear, and all you saw was weiner. Amazingly enough, he said that would be hilarious too. I say again, my husband is a creeper.
ten-tenners' may siggy: me & mama on my wedding day
What's LittleMissNewlywed Cooking?
I was going to quote every post just about since they were all good ones, but decided to just reply to all this way.
This is one of the best posts I've seen on here in a while. lol. I told DH about it and we were both laughing.
Can I say how much it grosses me out when lady parts are referred to as anything fishy?
hahaha. Figures something stupid like that would be the cause of death for a laptop.
Note to self: Never visit www.hollywoodtuna.com