Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Ridiculously long birth story
My water broke at about 5:45 am on the morning of my due date. I was able to make it to the bathroom before everything really started gushing. I called the triage nurse at my doctor?s practice and then waited for a doctor to call back about when to come in. I couldn?t do much during this time because there was so much fluid, and walking around was really unpleasant. I read posts on CN from my phone for a while and remember laughing at Hezz?s ?turn around F-train? comment to Fallin in that thread about maternity pictures for adoptive parents. Luckily, we had already packed a hospital bag. I had a few small contractions, but nothing major.
About 90 minutes later, the doctor?s office called back and said I should go to the hospital. The car ride took 5 minutes, and we were very calm until we were about a block away. I had a really intense contraction and felt downward pressure and the urge to push. I freaked out and thought I was going to have the baby in the car. I still don?t know why I had a contraction like this so early in the process, and especially since the baby never descended very far.
When I arrived at the hospital, the contractions were 3-4 minutes apart and I was 4 cm dilated. Once we were settled into the L&D room, the resident kept taking samples of the fluid to test, in order to confirm it was amniotic fluid and not something else. Apparently it didn?t look quite like amniotic fluid under a microscope. The nurse and I were like, ?WTF else could it be? There?s way too much here to be urine.? They also did an ultrasound and said I had an abnormally high amount of fluid.
Some time later (I wasn?t very good about noting the time during the whole process), the nurse came into my room with a new IV bag and said, ?So, you?re starting pitocin.? This rubbed me the wrong way, since none of the doctors had come to talk to me about it, and she presented it as if it was a foregone conclusion, not a choice. When I made this point, they explained to me that the contractions had slowed down to 15 minutes apart. I tried getting out of bed so I could move around to speed them up without medication, but there was still SO much fluid coming out that it really wasn?t possible. I was seriously afraid that I was going to slip. I decided to do the pitocin.
The pitocin contractions were definitely stronger, but for a while I was getting through them without medication. Unfortunately, even though I had dilated to 5 cm, the baby was still really high. The attending watched me go through a few contractions and said that, even though I was breathing through them, my body was really tense. I tried relaxing more but kept involuntarily tensing. The attending finally suggested that an epidural might let me relax enough to let the baby come down more. I didn?t have strong feelings about not getting pain medication, so I agreed.
After getting the epidural, it took only 2-3 hours for me to dilate from 5 to 10, but the baby still wasn?t descending. We agreed that I would keep contracting for a few more hours before pushing in hopes that he could move down further.
At about 5pm, they asked me to start pushing. While the epidural was working, I found it easier to watch the monitor for contractions than to judge when to push by sensation only. The resident and attending were there at first but left the room after 15 minutes or so. This was discouraging because I knew it meant the baby was nowhere close to coming out.
I kept pushing for an hour or so, and then the epidural stopped working. The nurse and I decided to take advantage of this by having me push in different positions. I liked the squatting bar the best but found it really tiring.
It was about this time that the resident and chief resident started checking the position of the baby?s head. They disagreed about whether he was face up or face down. This is when I started feeling really annoyed that I was at a teaching hospital. They eventually got the attending to confirm that he was face up, but it took extra time and required more hands than normal going up my vag.
After another hour or so of pushing and no progress, they told me the baby probably wasn?t descending because he was face up, and they wanted to try turning him manually while I pushed. They re-upped my epidural for this part. When this stage started, they said that they would try to turn him once, then I would push for an hour, and then we would discuss our options. However, after one attempt at turning him and one hour of pushing, a nurse I had never met came into the room and said she was now going to try to turn him, and then I would have to push again. This pissed me off. I was tired, I had been working with a certain time frame in mind, and I didn?t think they were entitled to change it on me. I said this to the new nurse, and she looked like she wanted to tell me off but knew she couldn?t. Because I felt I really had no other choice at this point, I let her try. During the next round of pushing, the epidural stopped working again. Also, the nurse who had spent the majority of my labor with me, and who had been really critical in keeping me motivated, ended her shift, and the nurse who replaced her just didn?t have the same touch. It was around this time that I knew in the back of my head that I was going to end up with a c-section.
Finally, the attending came back and said she wanted to check me again. I asked, ?Is there a point to all this?? because I was so tired and fed up. She said she wanted to make one more attempt herself to turn the baby, and alternatively, she would check to see if he was low enough to attempt a forceps delivery. I consented, she checked, and the baby still hadn?t come down. Additionally, I had started running a fever and was put on antibiotics. We agreed that, under these circumstances, I would need a c-section.
I was initially relieved to decide on the c-section because (1) it meant that everything would be over soon, and (2) I got more (and stronger) pain medication. I had pushed for 5 hours; I was exhausted and incredibly swollen in the junk, to the point where I yelped in pain when my hindquarters touched the bed. While I was waiting for the anesthesiologist to get me drugged up for the operation, I had to keep pushing at each contraction to deal with the pain. I think I may have pooped during this time, but no one said anything. The nurse changed the pads under me, and I thought one looked brown.
When they brought me into the operating room, I started feeling panicky. It?s scary to be in a cold, bright operating room, to be transferred on a backboard onto the surgical bed, and to have your arms strapped down at your sides. I closed my eyes and tried to go into some kind of sleepy/meditative state so that I wouldn?t start really flipping out. I remember picturing myself walking through Whole Foods and picking stuff out in each aisle. As a result, my husband came into the room to find me with my eyes closed, head to the side, and shaking violently from the medication. He was worried I had lost consciousness or was having a seizure, but the doctors told him I was OK.
I was really nervous about the testing they did to make sure that I was properly numbed before surgery. I was worried that I was giving the wrong answers and that they would cut into me and I would feel it. Fortunately (I guess) they announced when they made the initial incision and the uterine incision, and I didn?t feel either one, so I knew I was numb.
It seemed like they got the baby out really quickly. He cried and peed immediately, and they brought him to the warming table. They brought him over to my head so I could see him, and then he and my H went to the nursery. I didn?t know at the time, but apparently he got 9s on his apgars. He had to get antibiotics because of my fever. Waiting for them to finish the surgery was the worst part, because the anticipation of getting the baby out was over and my husband was gone. I tried to focus on not shaking.
Finally, they were done. The last thing the attending said to me was, ?A lot of the women that I treat end up second guessing their decision to have a c-section, so I just wanted to let you know, with the way he was positioned, you could have pushed all night and into tomorrow, and he still wouldn?t have come out. You shouldn?t feel badly at all about choosing the c-section when you did.?
When I got back to my room, two of my friends from college were there waiting for me. They are both doctors and had gone to med school at the hospital where I delivered, so they managed to talk their way in even though visiting hours had ended. I was a little embarrassed since I was literally just coming out of surgery, but I appreciated the effort they made to visit me.
The main thing I remember from that night is drinking after the surgery. I was insatiable, and when they told me I could have Sprite, it was the best thing ever. After several hours, they eventually brought the baby back. He had an IV in his hand on a huge splint, but other than that he was fine.
The next few days in the hospital were rough. They got me up to walk and shower the next morning. I was glad to be mobile, but it hurt like hell, and no one offered any suggestions for how to maneuver in and out of the bed, so getting up and down took forever. H had to go home several times a day to take care of Jenny, and we had to send James to the nursery at those times because I wasn?t mobile enough yet to get up and tend to him if he needed something. Also, the woman in the room next to mine had (from what we could overhear) either mental health or substance abuse issues and screamed intermittently all night and day. She made it hard to get any rest, even when the baby wasn?t in the room.
On Saturday, one of the nursery nurses came to our room and said that they needed to keep James an extra day because of abnormal bloodwork. I was obviously unhappy about the news, but also in the way it was delivered. Again, I had to demand an explanation before a doctor would come to my room and explain it to me. It?s not worth going into detail, but basically they were concerned that he had contracted a bacterial infection from the amniotic fluid. Luckily, when my OB heard this news, she directed that I stay in the hospital an extra day, too. James hated the IV for the antibiotics and, after he knocked two of them out, they ended up giving him injections. Finally, on Sunday afternoon, he passed all of his blood tests, and we were cleared to leave on Monday.
So, that?s it. I don?t have any negative feelings about having the c-section, though I would have preferred not to have all the problems with the epidural. And he?s really a very good baby. Once we can get this feeding stuff worked out, we?ll be OK.
Re: Ridiculously long birth story
oh crap, HT. That sounds so rough. I know fitty had a csection too after hours of labor and the baby not dropping. You would think with you shorties the baby has less room to go and that would be easier. Maybe I have a short vagina,
But seriously, I am glad everything worked out, but sorry about your frustrations with your medical team. Am I understanding that your OB was not involved in many of these decisions, but the attending at the hospital (and students, etc) provided most of your care during labor?
Husbands should be like Kleenex: Soft, strong, and disposable.
Yeah. I had one OB who I saw for the majority of my appointments, but I had seen other doctors in the practice as well during my pregnancy, including the one who performed my c-section. My OB was actually on duty when I first came in, but she eventually had to go do a surgery on someone else. She came in before going to the operating room to tell me what was going on, and I didn't see her for the rest of the time.
Talk about a trial of labor, oof. You are a birthing champion because you managed to survive that with a surprisingly positive outlook.
Hope you guys are able to get all the nursing issues resolved.
Mucho likes purple nails and purple cupcakes
Why is it that I always find the turning the baby part the worst part of birthin stories? I can handle all the poop, c-section, ripping and such but the turning the baby thing sends chills up my spine.
Congrats again to you and he's so cute.
I was so engrossed in reading your story, that I tried to eat a staple as I was mindlessly shoving popcorn into my mouth. I am lovely.
Sorry it was so difficult! I can't imagine how exhausting that must have been.
During the weeks leading up to your labor, did you get internal exams by your OB? Did they ever make any comments about James being high still?
I'm just curious because at my last couple of appointments, my OB always told me that Andy was still so high up that she was unable to feel him (a little TMI I suppose). Due to other reasons, we had already scheduled a c/s, but once he was out, it was pretty obvious that I probably wouldn't have even gone into labor on my own. Obviously, not the same situation since you did go into labor, but just seeing if there is a connection. You can ignore me. I am rambling as I try to avoid work.
I am in awe of you right now. I can't believe you pushed for as many hours as you did and that you gave all sorts of attitude when the medical team treated you like a child. Most of all, I appreciate the poop report. Thank you for giving us what we really want.
What does an apgars score of 9 mean? I don't know nuthin' bout no apgars.
"That chick wins at Penises, for sure." -- Fenton
Congrats on getting through that! Were you are any point tempted to scream, "I'm a lawyer, biznatches. Get your asses in here and explain things." I wouldn't have been. Not at all.
Why do they tie down your arms in the c-section? I think that would freak me the freak out.
Wow you are a trooper! I am glad you were vocal about not being thrilled when they tried to do something without explanation.
I really appreciate the honest and detailed birth stories shared here so thanks. It makes me feel much more knowledgeable and prepared for what could happen in various situations.
Oh, what a trooper you are! That sounds really, really rough. The Whole Foods fantasy is truly adorable, though.
The nerve!
House | Blog
Claire Elizabeth 12/31/2011
Married Bio
Thank you for sharing your story. You are a champ for pushing as long as you did. I was exhausted after just 90 minutes of pushing. Congratulations on your beautiful boy!
That shiit is too long. I'm not reading that.
Kidding! Thank you for sharing it, I really do enjoy others' stories. I'm really sorry you had to go through all the trouble with the epidural and with your stupid nurses. I'm glad you gave them some attitude too. Jerks.
My practice was the same way - see one OB most of the time, then you just get the luck of the draw when you deliver, but through both pregnancies I managed to meet most of the other OBs and I liked them all. Except for one, who was the first one I met when I went in to be induced with Will, who was all, "Ha ha, you won't be able to deliver vaginally, but I suppose I'll let you try." She was a biitch.
I also had a stupid nurse after having Evie, who came in while Evie was in the NICU and said all upbeat and happy, "Did you know your baby has to be on antibiotics?!" and when I asked why, she was all, "Oh, I don't know! Ask someone else! You can call the NICU if you want!" I hated her.
thanks for sharing; I loooove birth stories. I was grinding my teeth reading through some of it though--they way they just presented you with pitocin and weren't helpful in explanations, for example. I'm sorry all your junk was so swollen and out of sorts AND you had to deal w. a c recovery. : (
I have to say my hospital was soooo good about giving me options and keeping me informed as to what's going on.
I had a ton of BF issues, probably due to my c as well. I'm sure you're in the competent hands of a lactation specialist, but if you want to know how we got through it, I'd be glad to share (not that every issue is the same).
Seriously, you're so tiny! Where was he hiding, your boobs?
Good lord are you a freaking champion, girl. And inspiration for sure. Labor sounds scary.
I bet her FUPA's name is Shane, like the gunslinger/drifter of literature.--HappyTummy
I loved reading it, thanks for sharing HT.
I'm sorry your nurses were assholes but I loved reading about your sass.
Ooooch, it's a good thing he's so cute.
Congrats, Tummy!
"The meek shall inherit the earth" isn't about children. It's about deer. We're all going to get messed the fuckup by a bunch of cloned super-deer.- samfish2bcrab
Sometimes I wonder if scientists have never seen a sci-fi movie before. "Oh yes, let's create a super species of deer. NOTHING COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG." I wonder if State Farm offers a Zombie Deer Attack policy. -CaliopeSpidrman
Wow, HT. That is impressive. I'm glad everything ended well for you both and that you don't have any hard feelings about the direction it took.
I'm with Fallin--my H has said he was about 0.2 seconds away from throwing the "I'm a lawyer" card when our cranky on-call doc tried to send me into surgery without any discussion/explanation.
Your sig pic of James is super cute. More pictures, please.
I am incredibly angry for you right now. maybe the teaching hospital should put some time into bedside manner and relaying information.
I kind of loathe all people associated with L&D. It just seems there are far more nasty people than there should be.
But, I am glad you, your baby and your cooter are all ok. James is a cutie.
For less then ten cents a day, you can feed a hungry child.
I'm sorry your nurses were asshats. That was probably the most hands you had up your vag since Fingerlakes, huh?
The first time my junk got swollen, I was a little freaked out, but eventually, I learned to like it.
Your baby is real cute, yo. Seriously a mini version of you. And you're already a mini version of you.
3 out of 4 dead babies agree! pepsi is better than coke! - EdithBouvierBeale
Lordy. Grow some balls and stop lurking. It's like stealing from the internet. Jesuschrist. -- AudreyHorne
I hate love and marriage. I got married so I could destroy these things from the inside. - NoisyPenguin
It's a good thing my circle of trust is as giant as my vagina. That only leaves a couple people out. - Cali
Thanks everyone.
Cali, the Apgar test is a way of assessing newborn babies at 1 and 5 minutes after birth. The highest score is a 10. So even though I had a hell of a time getting him out, he still came out doing well.
I did mention at one point that H and I are lawyers, but (unfortunately, I guess) not in a threatening way. They noticed that MrTummy would ask me questions about why they were doing certain things, and I would explain it to him--correctly, most of the time. At one point a nurse was like, "You did your research. What do you do for a living?" I told her we are both lawyers. I wondered whether she was thinking, "Oh, great, another smartass who thinks going to babycenter.com makes her as much of an expert as her doctors."
I didn't really think to complain to anyone about the quality of care I received, but now that I think of it, I'm pretty sure they're sending me some sort of patient satisfaction survey to complete. I will mention it then. I did, however, complain that the hospital's lactation team and the doctors and nurses in the nursery did not seem to be on the same page, and that I felt very stressed, scrutinized, and pressured to meet conflicting goals and expectations.
My new LC is great, though. I still think the odds are slim that I'll be able to BF, but I feel encouraged enough to give it a few more days. And James had his 2 week appointment today and is back to his birth weight, which is the most important thing.
I'm going to continue AWing pictures of J in my sig because as each day passes he looks less like a mandrake from HP and the Chamber of Secrets.
Hey, you name your kid after two Harry Potter characters, he's bound to end up looking like something from the book. I think he's super cute with his Magoo face.
I'm glad he scored a 9, but I hope you had a serious discussion with him about how you expect him to get 10s from here on out. Don't be lenient or he'll never get into a good college.
"That chick wins at Penises, for sure." -- Fenton