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Dad's transplant PTSD or Sleep Apnea

My dad doesn't sleep through the night. (I'm living with my Dad until I get married in May because I'm Catholic and other practical reasons). He wakes up exhausted. He claims it's because of PTSD, which is true. My brother became increasingly sick over two years and needed a heart transplant. There were a couple of nights where Dad would sleep through my phone calls that my brother was in the hospital, or even worse, when my brother was calling for help down the hall. Now he wakes up at every little noise. He is on antidepressants (and dealing with the issue) but I worry it is also sleep apnea. I have always fallen asleep to the sound of my Dad snoring, but in recent years it sounds uneven and gets deeper and lighter and it just sounds like sleep apnea. I'm not a doctor, and I tend to be a worrier. How can I convince my Dad to go in? He REFUSES and exhausted and I don't know if I should push it. 

Side note: Please consider becoming an organ donor. My brother received his heart at the age of 24 last year. Now he can run ten miles and has a higher quality of life than ever before. He waited a long time for it and knows people still waiting. Choose to give life, choose to be an organ donor. You will never be forgotten for making such a selfless decision.  

Re: Dad's transplant PTSD or Sleep Apnea

  • I am willing to bet he's got sleep apnea.

    He needs a sleep clinic stat. They can diagnose his problem.

     Is your dad overweight? Usually there is a weight/snoring connection.

    He also needs a full checkup. Maybe he's also got sinus prolblems or a deviated septum. Both can cause poor sleep.

  • He is heavier and he does have a severely deviated septum. He broke his nose like 3 times as a kid. 

     

    Any tips on how to convince him to go? 

  • try having a heart to heart with him.  sleep apnea is more than just a sleep problem, it can really shorten your life.  
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  • Tell him that you love him and want him in your life as long as possible. 
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  • Excellent advice from the 2 pps.

    Indeed have a heart to heart with him -- and he is also probably dead tired during the day. I'd hate to see him conk out at work and get in trouble or have it happen whil he's behind the wheel of a car.:(

  • Tell him he and your brother went through and awful lot to get the transplant and start a new life. It would be a shame for him to drop dead so soon after.  And horrible for the son to think he caused some of it.
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  • imageSpenjamins:
    Tell him he and your brother went through and awful lot to get the transplant and start a new life. It would be a shame for him to drop dead so soon after.  And horrible for the son to think he caused some of it.

    This is very good.  Also, do a little research (sleep apnea can actually lead to brain damage over time, because of the oxygen deprivation...among other things) and talk to him about it.  If he's exhausted all the time, I would imagine he'd be dying to get a decent night's sleep.  If he's being treated for PTSD, I'm surprised his therapist hasn't recommended a sleep study -- if the physical symptom of sleep disturbance doesn't get treated, it doesn't do much good to treat the emotional symptoms. 

  • Great advice so far.

    My uncle had a sleep study and was diagnosed with sleep apnea. My aunt says that diagnosis (and then getting the CPAP machine for sleeping) saved their marriage. My uncle says it changed his life.

    Maybe you could share some stories like this? Also, I don't think most people realize the bad health effects of sleep apnea, they just think it is for snoring. Maybe, if he is like that, you could educate him a bit about how dangerous sleep apnea actually is, yet how there is a fairly simple fix. His quality of life will be SO much better.

     How wonderful to hear the outcome for your brother with his heart transplant! I have been an organ donor for years, since I first got my driver's license at 16.

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  • I have a sleep disorder; though not sleep apnea.

    Before I was able to get treatment, I was constantly exhausted. I would fall asleep while standing up in a crowded room full of people, during normal working hours. You know that feeling where you are so tired that your head hurts? I had that everyday, most hours I was awake.

    Now, with a diagnosis and treatment, I am a very different person. I have energy to do things that most people do, like working out, staying out late with friends, etc.

    So in addition to what the PPs have mentioned, I would let him know that with treatment, he could potentially feel a lot healthier and happier.

    GL

    Hope is not a strategy.
  • I agree with the heart to heart.  My Dad also has apnea.  He was chronicly exhausted, had perma dark circles under his yes and would thrash around in his sleep (often times whacking my Mom in the process.  She had bruises more than once in a while because of it!)  in addition to his snoring because he'd have vivid dreams almost all the time since he wasn't hitting the appropriate sleep cycles.  It is amazing the transformation between then and now (He sleeps with a CPAP machine).  Apnea can have all sorts of crazy side effects - there was a professional athlete here in Minnesota who had apnea and they discovered that not only did he stop breathing at night, but his heart was stopping temporarily too!!  There is really no harm in having a study done to evaluate his patterns.  It doesn't hurt, they don't stick you with a needle or anything.  They just wire you up a little and watch how your brain and body respond while you rest. 
  • He's probably stubborn as a hound dog, to boot.:(

    Hoping you talk him into going. He'd benefit so much from it. Actually, his life probably depends upon it.

  • My partner was having snoring problems as well.  For nearly a year, I just couldn't get a good night's sleep with him.  It was making me irritable and I was just flat out angry with him -- the doctor had approved a sleep study for him a year ago and he just hadn't wanted to go.  Finally, one night I noticed that he was not breathing for periods of time in the night.  I told him the next morning and he finally scheduled the sleep study.

    He is so incredibly happy he did!  He did two studies.  The first one just gave them data on how often he was not breathing in the night.  This was a real eye-opener.  He was prescribed a CPAP machine and then did a sleep study with it.  He thought the mask and the sound would interfere with his sleep but it didn't.  Plus he slept better just that one night in the sleep center than he had slept in years!

    Now, both of us are so happy that he has the CPAP machine.  It is much smaller than you would think.  It is literally 6" x 6" by 3" -- like the size of two paperback books.  The sound is so much less than the snoring.  I have no problems sharing the room with him because the sound is so minimal -- the same as a fan in the room.  Plus, the sound is constant, not like the irregular sounds of snoring.  

    The mask isn't a problem for him either.  He was nervous at first, but it has not been a problem.  And the benefits clearly outweigh the minimal annoyance.  My partner has cut back on his coffee every morning, because he is not waking up exhausted every morning.  He absolutely feels so much better.  

  • I have an idea --- why not reesearch snoring and sleep apnea and CPAP machines ---and show your dad DarlingMiss' reply to your post. That should be a positive impetus to get him to a sleep clinic.

    Wishing you luck.

  • I just came back today with my results from the sleep study center.  The study itself was very easy, and insightful and while I did not end up having sleep apnea I do have some information which will help me.

    Have him get his regular/complete physical with his regular physician - including blood work.  Tell the regular doctor about the sleeping issues (and follow up with any test-result directives) and ask for a referral.  It's nonevasive and doesn't mean that you'll end up on with Rx drugs, a cpac machine (cpap? I forget).   

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  • You could try to convince him to first have an overnight oximetry. This is a preliminary at-home test, very simple, but will show if he has oxygen desaturation, etc. This will be a good indicator of suspected OSA (obstructive sleep apnea). His primary care provider can order this for him. Based on these results hopefully you can convince him to take the next step.

    Ask him if he has headaches? High blood pressure? Trouble losing weight no matter how hard you try? All of these are symptoms of OSA. Snoring is a good indicator, but does not always = OSA. The overnight sleep study is painless, and only requires one or two nights away. He'll have a tv, and breakfast waiting for him in the morning most likely. If he does have OSA, he'll sleep better one night in the lab with a cpap mask on than he has in years. If this goes untreated all sorts of health problems can ensue.

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