December 2010 Weddings
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Late gifts?

I finally compiled all my gift lists together on an excel sheet, working from the original guest list.  There are a number of guests who we didn't get a gift from. (Please Note: I'm not being a brat and saying that I'm upset people didn't give, I'm just worried that the mail could have messed up or I messed up in my gift recording)  

Some I'm not surprised about, they were parents cousins who live far away and didn't come to the wedding.  But there are maybe 20 who came to the wedding, are relatives or close family friends who I can't imagine wouldn't give a gift.  It just seems odd to me. We got married on NYE.  Maybe people are planning to still send them?  Perhaps we got looked over b/c of the holiday wedding, people have a lot going on during the beginning of the year?  Did any of you early December brides receive any late gifts?  We got a lot the week before the wedding and at the wedding but have only recieved two since we've been back in town.  I think etiquette says you have 3 months to send a gift but I wasn't sure if people actually waited that long.  I usually buy one off the registry the week before the wedding.

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Re: Late gifts?

  • Let me share with you that when we first recorded our gifts and started our thank you's, I seriously thought someone stole gifts or envelopes, etc.. The people that did not give a gift were immediate family, bridal party, and just people you would thought woudl give a gift.  We rec'd a slight trickle of gifts post wedding, but mostly people that wanted to mail their monetary gift for safety reasons or didn't attend, but wanted to send a little something.

     I've learned that it's definitely a hard time for people and their attedance was definitely a gift. Some people actually never give gifts at weddings and just a card which is what I learned in my circle. Although, we may have different rules about gift-giving, I don't know...some people just don't. Also, I think the wedding close to the holiday put some people out. There were also several attendees that recently lost jobs so I chalked that no-gifts up to that as well. Of course I would never expect them to...

     Looking at the registry there are just a few items we didn't actually receive yet, but were purchased. We had a lot of no shows due to weather so I am thinking those people may want to meet up at some point for dinner...

    At this point, rule out getting any additional gifts and if you do, it will be a fun surprise.  Hope it helps to know another bride experienced sort of the same thing...

     

  • Stinks doesn't it?  I'm still waiting for a couple late ones from people who acknowledged the gift was coming.  I couldn't imagine going to someone's wedding and not giving them a gift.  Twenty people?  That does seem like a lot.  I guess I would just hold out a couple more weeks and then perhaps send them a 'Thank you for coming' card, and see if that works.  Let's be honest, none of us HAVE to receive gifts, but we have every right to want them! :)  I'm not ashamed to say that because I treated my guests like royalty, and I'm sure you did too.

    Cheers! 

     

     


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  • Yeah I'm right there with you.  I didn't expect a gift from everyone but a couple in particular it was very surprising they sent no card no nothing.  For example, H's aunt and cousin had planned on coming to the wedding (they come to Florida every Christmas) well this year the aunt had some medical stuff come up so they couldn't come we never received a card or anything his aunt never even called him to congratulate us.  It upset H's parents pretty bad because like I said they come to Florida every Christmas and are very close with them and it is the first marriage out of the 3 children.  But we are very thankful for what we received and very thankful for the family and friends that took the time to come to the wedding and have a good time.
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  • We got married Dec. 18 and still have gifts coming.  I think a few things are at work here:  The holidays, people are busy,  the weather is iffy- here in the midwest anyway. 

    One of the girls who was in my wedding still has yet to give me our gift because of timing. She didn't want to worry about it the day of. We've gotten together once since the wedding, but it was right after work, and she forgot the gift at her house.

    I believe the rules of etiquette state that people have up to a year to get a gift to you. And, if they don't, don't worry about it. 

     

     

     

  • We invited 190 and about 80 attended and we got about 60 gifts total I think.... so I know what you're talking about. I just figured I was blessed enough to get my best friends and close family all in one place, and I know it may never happen again, so I'm content. Gifts are nice, but since we're living in a basement, I can't use ANY gifts yet anyway.
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