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DH Job (rant)
I'm at a loss with DH.....Here's some backstory...
Me-I've known since I was in high school what i wanted to do with my life....be a guidance counselor. I went to college for psychology, worked in a school after as a classroom aid, and an administrative assistant while I went to school for my Masters in K-12 school guidance. Unfortuantely I havent found a job yet so I'm working for a shipping company in Central MA and I apply to every guidance job I see in MA.
DH....got a BS in Commuincations, and has done sales for 7 years...has no idea what he wants to do, and is stuck in the sales rut. He has no idea what he would "want to do with his life" so he moves from job to job every two years. Right now has him workign for a company "that was easy" in a corporate account sales position. He busts ass, gets awards one week and warnings the next. we've been d!cked around for about a year, are they gonna fire him, are they not, and every tiem they get him worked up and then dont fire him, but its the same sh!t two months later......its a yoyo and im tired of it....
My issue is that he has no idea what he wants to do....nothing we could even send him to school and have him work retail and do loans for....and im frustrated.
Our marriage is awesome, no doubt about that. We work well together...except for this....he holds my education over my head, yet wont do soul searching for himself. As a trained guidance counselor I try to help him but to no avail.....he just isnt having it.....anyone know of anything/suggestions/experiance?
Im just freaked....I only make about 400 a week, with student loans, rent, and now probably picking up whatever slack unemployment wont cover if it comes to that I'm freaking out.....and he has the benefits, its just freakin scary 
He wants to fall back on the money we got from the wedding....what was going to be our down payment. I want a house someday.....I dont want to depleat the only means for us to have a down payment before we have a chance to build on what we have......
Ugh sorry for the freak out....I appreciate anyone who got this far
Getting fit for IVF!
(add another 20lbs and you have my total weight lost! )
Re: DH Job (rant)
First off, I want to congratulate you on finding your passion and following through with it. You are a lucky person to know what makes you happy.
Now the bad news... that is not what happens for a majority of people out there. It's a tough, scary and frustrating road for most people. Some people never find that career that is meaningful to them. That's just reality.
I think you are being too hard on your husband. Maybe to you he doesn't seem motivated, but maybe inside he just feels lost. Obviously the situation he is in right now is not ideal, but I think you're being a bit judge-y when you make it out to be about direction rather than just working at a terrible job.
Yes, it'd be wonderful if that lightbulb went off and he decided that he had found his path. But right now I think you need to support him in his quest rather than holding it against him. Step 1 - getting him out of the job he's in now, even if it's another sales job.
If you do not focus on the carreer question but on the situation, he clearly works for a bad boss or bad management. I have encountered that several times in my career as has my husband. I agree with pp that he needs a change even if to another sales job. Jobs out there are hard to find so do not put too much pressure on him but support the quest to find a better job/environment. My DH has been unemployed for almost 2 years but financially we can handle it. He has never found his passion either. To him a job is a job even with his engineering degree and PE license.
I guess Im more scared about the fact that he's freakin miserable, and his job sucks and that if he does get on unemployment, im not eligible for benefits till march, plus i make *** even with the 3$ raise i got last week so its gonna be rediculous to make ends meet until he finds something. Forgive me for wanting him, after 7 years, to actually find a job he enjoys getting up for and going to every day, for wishing that my best friend has something he likes doing...
ETA I didnt know this posted I thought I lost it....*** end of my thought is....
I guess I didnt mean to make it seem like I thought he wasnt motivated....I'm more scared that we're not financially good for him to lose his job.....without something waiting.....he doesnt want to do sales so wont even look there......I never said i thought he wasnt motivated, Im scared that unlike others, we wont be ok on my income and on his unemployment. I am NOT judgy, sorry I came across that way, I'm concerned that he hates what he does and dont want him to make a career move that makes him hate his job still. I want him to be HAPPY, not miserable....guess that makes me judgy and harsh and a b!tch which was NOT where I wanted to go with this.
Getting fit for IVF!
If it makes you feel any better the "that was easy" company has an extremely good HR department. They always fight for the employees. So even though they hand out warnings and threaten to fire someone they wont unless the person messes up REALLY BAD. I mean...you seriously have to TRY to get fired from there. Unless they start lay offs again he should be okay until he can find another job.
Just tell him to lay low, and don't mess up.
Even in the corporate office? and thanks
Getting fit for IVF!