Have been way excited to tell you all this.

stripesandspots · January 2011

So, I had a really great day yesterday and it is so weird because rather than say anything to my friends IRL I was only excited to get to work on Monday to tell you all -

So, SD is a hot mess. She is really out of control. Couple that with my lack of patience and we almost always come to blows when she stays at our house. I am exhausted from chasing her around and exhausted from trying to not bash myself against the wall.

We have talked about this a lot in marriage counseling - how we need to set boundaries when she is at our house. How little kids WANT to be disciplined and how it is possible that she can be disciplined at our house despite not being disciplined anywhere else.

Anyway. DH picked her up Saturday and must have given her a good talking to in the car on the way to our house because Saturday she was an angel. So good, in fact, we decided to go out to eat at Iguana but after waiting 30 (or 40, whoops) minutes, we decided to go to Chick Fil A instead. She was SO GOOD while we were waiting but we figured we were seconds away from a meltdown, so that is why we left. In fact, when we decided to leave she said "Oh I really wanted to eat at a place called Iguana." So cute!

Then, DH got a call from work. He had to work Sunday. Keeping in mind, we were having a birthday party for her at 1pm on Sunday and we hadn't done a very good job of getting the house ready given that at 5pm Saturday night, we still had workers in our house. I was soooo nervous to be alone with her -that has never happened before.

She woke me up at 8am on Sunday and we looked through DH and my photo albums (she loves this). She was being so sweet so I suggested breakfast at Cracker Barrel but warned her she had to be good. Oh my Lord - she was SO GOOD. Sat at the table and colored and sang to herself - I was so very impressed. Then, we went to Target - again, on the way there I talked to her about staying in the cart, not touching anything, yada yada and again - absolute angel.

So we got home and I was very nervous about getting everything for the party ready, getting her ready, getting me ready, and keeping her entertained. She demands to be entertained CONSTANTLY. I put her in the tub and ran around cleaning the house (I kept screaming into the bathroom "I CAN'T HEAR YOU SINGING" - I figured, if I could hear her singing, she wasn't drowning). Then, I put her in our bed with her barbies so I could vaccum. Then, when I decided to shower I put her on our bathroom floor with a puzzle so I could watch her and shower at the same time. Damn, I don't know how you ladies do it. DH finally got home at noon thirty (yes, THIRTY MINUTES before the party started) and she didn't seem to care or notice that he hadn't been there. Whew!

Anyway, I am so happy it went well. There are a lot of highs and lows with this situation and I was so proud of her for being such an angel. I hated that DH had to work but another good thing came out of it: SD said "I didn't know daddy worked." I said "Um, all grown ups work.' She said "Well, mommy told me daddy doesn't work and that is why we never have any money." Indifferent

bluekid · January 2011

Woo hoo!! I would have been wicked nervous about that too, but it sounds like you did a bang-up job. Maybe you guys will be the stable forces in her life - that can make a huge impact on her development. Hats off to both of you.

Snowful · January 2011

I'm so happy the weekend went so well! It's amazing the things she'll say coming from her mother's mouth. Thank god she has you guys who can provide some normalcy to her life.

tbvenable · January 2011

stripesandspots:

So, I had a really great day yesterday and it is so weird because rather than say anything to my friends IRL I was only excited to get to work on Monday to tell you all -

So, SD is a hot mess. She is really out of control. Couple that with my lack of patience and we almost always come to blows when she stays at our house. I am exhausted from chasing her around and exhausted from trying to not bash myself against the wall.

We have talked about this a lot in marriage counseling - how we need to set boundaries when she is at our house. How little kids WANT to be disciplined and how it is possible that she can be disciplined at our house despite not being disciplined anywhere else.

Anyway. DH picked her up Saturday and must have given her a good talking to in the car on the way to our house because Saturday she was an angel. So good, in fact, we decided to go out to eat at Iguana but after waiting 30 (or 40, whoops) minutes, we decided to go to Chick Fil A instead. She was SO GOOD while we were waiting but we figured we were seconds away from a meltdown, so that is why we left. In fact, when we decided to leave she said "Oh I really wanted to eat at a place called Iguana." So cute!

Then, DH got a call from work. He had to work Sunday. Keeping in mind, we were having a birthday party for her at 1pm on Sunday and we hadn't done a very good job of getting the house ready given that at 5pm Saturday night, we still had workers in our house. I was soooo nervous to be alone with her -that has never happened before.

She woke me up at 8am on Sunday and we looked through DH and my photo albums (she loves this). She was being so sweet so I suggested breakfast at Cracker Barrel but warned her she had to be good. Oh my Lord - she was SO GOOD. Sat at the table and colored and sang to herself - I was so very impressed. Then, we went to Target - again, on the way there I talked to her about staying in the cart, not touching anything, yada yada and again - absolute angel.

So we got home and I was very nervous about getting everything for the party ready, getting her ready, getting me ready, and keeping her entertained. She demands to be entertained CONSTANTLY. I put her in the tub and ran around cleaning the house (I kept screaming into the bathroom "I CAN'T HEAR YOU SINGING" - I figured, if I could hear her singing, she wasn't drowning). Then, I put her in our bed with her barbies so I could vaccum. Then, when I decided to shower I put her on our bathroom floor with a puzzle so I could watch her and shower at the same time. Damn, I don't know how you ladies do it. DH finally got home at noon thirty (yes, THIRTY MINUTES before the party started) and she didn't seem to care or notice that he hadn't been there. Whew!

Anyway, I am so happy it went well. There are a lot of highs and lows with this situation and I was so proud of her for being such an angel. I hated that DH had to work but another good thing came out of it: SD said "I didn't know daddy worked." I said "Um, all grown ups work.' She said "Well, mommy told me daddy doesn't work and that is why we never have any money."

Sounds like mommy needs to have her head examined. Other than the comment she sounded like she did really well. Glad you had a great weekend with her!

OSUWifey09 · January 2011

That last sentence caught me off guard a little - wow. She sounds like a winner.

I'm SO glad the whole weekend went awesome besides that little part though!

Temp856430000003146 · January 2011

Wow! Well, it's hard for me to imagine her the other way because she was oh so cute and sweet when I saw her. Sounds like you did a great job with her by yourself!

oklagirl · January 2011

I love that you made her keep singing to verify she wasn't drowning. Totally something I would do.

Congrats on making it through with her solo!

I missed the post with the backstory on this, but I've been able to figure most of it out, I think. How old is SD, though?

IPmama · January 2011

Yay for you! It is rough being a stepmom! I have two stepkids who aren't used to rules either! It has caused a lot of frustration in my marriage. How old is your SD? She sounds young, which makes it a lot easier with the discipline and for her to continue it. Mine are 12 and 8, so it is a lot of work! Good luck, sounds like you did great! Just be consistent and you'll do fine!