Family Matters
IPmama
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Get stepkids to flush?
Okay I have SS 8 and SD 12 who are gross in the bathroom. I understand some of it like toothpaste spit in the hand towel or in the sink...but not flushing or putting toothpaste on the floor?
How would you handle this or explain this? We have constantly reminded them nicely and scolding to flush. It used to be just the 8yr old but now I think it is the 12yr old too. Who always gets on to 8yr of not doing it because she is the one who shares a bathroom with him.
I do know that at their moms they don't flush most of the time, or at least the boy. Because apparently they let him pee on the floor and they'll just clean up after him. Thank goodness he doesn't do it at our house! But even at their grandparents house they started not to flush!
Re: Get stepkids to flush?
Is it not flushing pee or not flushing poo?
If its pee, it wouldn't be a big deal to me (I will pee in the toilet a few times before flushing during the day to save water)
If its poo, I would have a big old meeting/discussion about it and tell them they must flush poo. If you find they didn't there will be xyz consequences (I would have them clean the whole bathroom if it was my kids at those ages)
Depending on the kid you may need to have different consequences, with each addtl time finding a 'present' having harsher consequence.
When you see there is something in the toilet (or toothpaste on the floor), march them both into the bathroom and tell them to flush, clean up, etc. Then have them wash their hands.
Make it so that it is more of a PITA to not clean up after themselves.
With the messes, when you find it make them clean it up. They'll blame each other because that's what appropriate at their ages, but they'll get it sorted out when the wrong kid has to clean up the other's messes all the time.
With the flushing... you might want to find out if their mom has a 'if it's yellow let it mellow' rule at her house. That could be the issue. Regardless, if you find pee or poo in the terlet, make them flush it.
http://pandce.proboards.com/index.cgi#general
OMG - haven't heard that in a long time! "If it's BROWN then flush it down!"
LOL!
This is the time to explain that there are different rules / expectations in different homes. I would not even mind calling their habits at mom's house pretty gross. I mean, even if mom cleans up after him - why should another person be wiping up your pee?
This. And reinforce that different houses have different rules. At your house, they go by your rules.
Sticky note on the bathroom door or mirror.
Yep. Don't do it for them. March them back in there and make them flush or clean up their mess. Eventually they will get sick of having to go back and take care of it.
BUT you and your DH need to be a united front on the solution. If he's not with you on this (or anything), it won't work and will only make you the bad guy.