North Florida Nesties
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
s/o s/o Curriculum - sex education?
How do you think sex education should be taught/approached in high schools? Should it be taught earlier? What approach do you think would/does work best? Should schools promote abstinence or make it rain condoms?
Re: s/o s/o Curriculum - sex education?
definitely, and not just for the sake of "don't get pregnant or diseases!".
I think the classes should be segregated male/female. There are enough hormones going on at the high school level without starting to talk about vaginas and having all the boys start to be immature (not that it desn't go both ways)
I think there should be a great deal more focus on the girl side about what is going on in their bodies monthly. When I read Taking Charge of Your Fertility, I didn't know half the stuff about my body that she tells you.
I think abstinence should be presented as a viable option, but education in BC should be given as well. I may be all for True Love Waits, but I'm not dumb enough to think that high school students are randomly going to stop having sex because they aren't given any education.
I totally agree with your first point and really, honestly (in a not at all condescending way, I swear) respect you for your second sentence.
I'm all for abstinence being presented as a good option, but I think in addition to what Rai said about girls learning more about their bodies that BC needs to be readily available to anyone and without parental consent. This might be kind of out-there crazy and I don't know if it could even be implemented, but I wish that a school nurse (NP?) could write a prescription for BC. Hell, I wish BC was available OTC.
ETA: And not shockingly, yes I think condoms should be available by the handful at middle and high schools. Set them out on counters instead of candy bowls and make them available in those vending machines for free in the bathrooms.
I agree. I know there are parents who would fight this tooth and nail, and I also know that if I had a girl who felt she couldn't come to me about BC, I would be brokenhearted, but girls have to be able to be proactive about their bodies.
I would also want schools to drill into girls heads that you CAN get VD from oral sex and that BC doesn't protect against it. I was amazed in high school how many girls didn't know this.Why would parents fight against that? Just because their pretty pretty princess would NEVER be having s-e-x at age 16 and how dare you suggest it? I'm assuming that's what it is, but that just blows my mind.
Also my mom and I had a great relationship growing up and still do. She was always very open and when I was all into youth group and swore I would never have sex before marriage (ha!) my mom told me that was a nice idea, but if it didn't end up working out to let her know and I'd get on BCP. I have no idea why, but I still didn't feel comfortable asking her and never did, even when I was sexually active. I don't know what she could have done differently. Having a girl scares the SH!T out of me.
I really think that's completely it. It defies logic a bit.
Yeah, I'm not sure what you can do to minimize that embarrassment from teens asking parents for BCP, especially in a churchy family. I'm not sure it's possible. You can obviously minimize the feeling that they'll be stricken from the family, but having an open conversation, not so much.
As far as sex ed in schools, I really wish it had been taught perfectly scientifically to start, then hit the emotional toll, blahblah. Instead, they seem to teach just enough to be dangerous, then go on and on about the possible cost of having sex. Considering that teenagers are psychologically unable to apply warnings to themselves, that's completely useless. Either you have to go overboard and scare the ever living crap out of them, which unfortunately produces an adult with sex issues, or they just don't register it and go on about their business.
So the only logical thing to do, IMO, is give them the whole bit from TCOYF, boys and girls, in separate classes. I think if most kids knew how complicated it all was, that might actually deter them even better than hellfire and brimstone. And if they choose to proceed, at least they're armed with every bit of information possible to help prevent pregnancy, if that is their goal. Versus most sex ed curricula today which probably focuses 80% on STDs, which are not unimportant, but, with the exception of HIV, are less life altering than creating a whole person; but they're easier on teachers and parents to discuss because they're ugly and horrifying, so it works with the scared straight method even in a nonreligious curriculum.
There's just no excuse in the modern world for so many ignorant adults when it comes to their own bodies, and it's thanks to sex ed. Even people that are experienced seem to prefer the romance of not knowing what's going on because it's "nice" er, so really that oppression of sexuality still works against them even if they rejected most of the message.
Idk how I feel about this. For MY kid, I definitely want her to know about what's going on.. and since -- like LB said, even in the best parent-child relationship, they might not come to you anyway -- I'd like it to be available to be talked about in school. I absolutely think that girls should be pulled aside pre-puberty and talk about the unholy fury that's about to happen. My grammar school actually did this, and I remember being ticked off that the boys got to go play kickball, but I guess I was more prepared than some other school districts' kids!
By the same token, for cultures that truly believe that premarital sex and contraception are sins.... if I believed that, I might be a little p o'd that my tax dollars were going toward making prophylactics available -- even if I weren't a parent. And if I were a parent... idk... I have a lot of mixed feelings.
:::Pulls the wool over her eyes, sticks fingers in ears and says "Na na na, I can't hear you!!!::: J/K.
Sort of.
How is it that my BABY is going to be 3?
BFP-2/25/11; 8 Wk U/S-3/25/11-No HB, measured 6.5 wks; D&C
I don't either, but I think it gets sticky. It makes me feel hypocritical to say that creationism shouldn't be taught in schools, but condoms should be in candy jars. I DO think that's right, but if I say that the school shouldn't get involved in religious matters, then it almost seems like it should stay out of the contraceptive game. Granted, no one's going to get HIV or have a crack baby because they learned that man poofed into existance... but by the same token, if you believe your child would go to hell for putting on a condom........ Idk. Part of me says home-school your kid if you feel that way, but the other part doesn't think you should have to.
The best adults can do is give kids every opportunity to protect themselves but I think the real responsibility is at home with the parents. They are the ones that should be fronting the information first and helping guide their kids through the hormone-laden crazy years. You know? Unfortunately, we all know that sometimes parents aren't really parents and it is up to other adults in kids lives to step in and do the parenting. Which is sad, but true.
Hm, I don't understand the part about no creationism but yes to condoms being hypocritical. Maybe I don't get it because I'm a heathen, but I don't want any future kids taught religion as fact/science in school and I don't want them to get KU/get someone else KU. Contraception has zero to do with creationism in my book. How are the two related? Sorry in advance for my ignorance.
And for this second part, if your child is down with the religion that calls for no condoms, wouldn't they just not use a condom? Even if your kid isn't supposed to use a condom, why would that stop anyone from wanting other kids who don't practice that religion from practicing safe sex? Rather than your kid just turning it down?
I'm sorry again if this is all very ignorant on my part to not be able to see the other side...
ETA: Not pointed you, but the general "you." *wide sweeping arm movement*
This dives into separation of church & state territory.....
But again, no one is stripping a 15yo down and putting a condom on his penis. The option to turn down free condoms is there. And more beneficial to society as a whole to do that and still let schools teach safe sex and make BC widely available. In this heathen's opinion.