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questions: for a sis who is sooo spoiled!!!!
Here is the deal, my sis is getting married in las vegas to a guy she has known for 5 months. (whatever) Anyway, i am currently pregnant with my due dated being 9-9-2011. After suffering a miscarriage we are so excited! My sis is getting married on 11-11-11 in vegas. after coming off of 6wks no paid maternity leave this is hard to afford especially with xmas right around the corner. I am planning on being there but my hubby my 4yr old son and our newborn might not be..this apparently is unexceptable by my parents and my sis. Am i being stupid or is this ridiculous? My sis told me that my hubby should work more part time jobs to help pay so we can all go. I am trying to not stress as i am not in the clear yet with this pregnancy..but i really am border line of saying "f" you and i am not going at all!! (Sorry hormones:)) Please someone let me know...i need an outsiders advice.
Thanks Amanda
Re: questions: for a sis who is sooo spoiled!!!!
If it were so important to your sister that your entire family be at her wedding, she should not have planned something that you couldn't afford. She should be happy that you are coming, even if the rest of your family can't make it.
It's not her business, or your parents' business, how you and your husband choose to spend your money. Tell her that you're sorry, but it just isn't possible for your whole family to come, and it's not up for discussion. If she and your parents continue to hassle you about it, you might want to consider not going at all- if you don't mind the fact that it will cause permanent damage to your relationship.
Ask your parents and/or sister to help with traveling expences. If they can't, tell them to kick rocks or better yet snow balls!!
I have a spoiled sister and she drives me up the wall sometimes with what she feels she "deserves". This is even after she has gotten married and has a 2 year old. Ugh!
I can't believe she had the nerve to tell you your DH should work more to be able to afford it.
If it's so important to your parents they can pay for the rest of your family to go. And like PP's said, if it was so important to your sister that your whole family be there, she should have planned a wedding in your hometown.
Unless she (or your parents) wants to pay for you all to go, she doesn't dictate what you do with your money or how many jobs your H works. I would just repeat over and over "H and I have made a decision based upon what is best for our family, its not open for further discussion"
Your sister is a brat.
This.
That was such an awesome response! I couldn't agree more!
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Pretty much what everyone else said.
No one gets to tell you what to do with your time and money.
With any luck the wedding will be called off by then if shes only known the guy 5 months. If not, I would have 1 short discussion on how if anyone has a problem with the fact it will be just you attending, then you wont be making an appearance either. Why should you dish out money to have a miserable time if everyone is gonna treat you like crap or make comments the whole time about how your H isn't there.
If someone told me that my H should work another job to pay to attend their wedding I woulda said F*** YOU and your wedding and I don't even have any pregnancy hormones! I wouldn't even be contemplating at this point, I would have made an immediate decision to not go. Your sis sounds like a total a$$hol3
My advice- keep all futher discussions on this simple. Don't over explain. Just say (when asked, don't bring it up, dont' "discuss" w/ them) "We can't afford it". Period. leave it at that.
Whatever they throw at you - "Thanks for your opinion, but we're doing what works best for us and our family.".
PERIOD. Don't explain more than that- it's NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
This is unbelievable. I think it's generous for you to go. She'll have to live with the fact that the entire family can't.
I'd also hold off on booking airfare or hotels for yourself ...I dare say this wedding won't happen.
74 books read in 2011
Boy Sis sounds like a Peach. If you can't afford it don't go... Also if they want to continue to b!tch about it, then say
"unless you are going to pay for the extra money needed to fly out the newbie, a 4 year old, and my H then Shut it... this is not up for discussion... and get over yourself."
Seriously, ignore your BEE BEE of a Sister.
Sara, Friend?
glove slap. I don't take crap.
If someone else paid, would your H and kids go? Or would it work out better for you to go alone?
I wouldn't even talk about the money. I would just say "It works better for our family if I go solo to the wedding."
I would be VERY tempted to say "I'll try to get the whole family to your next wedding," but would probably hold my tongue on that one!
There is an option of leaving my kiddos with my in-law and my hubby going with me..so we are discussing that option. But my kids are not going! The wedding is on a friday and we will be there thurs. afternoon and leave sat. morning. Plus vegas..??.. with kids??...no way. I just dont want to have to pack everything you need for a baby and kids and then to have to travel up and down the strip with kids is stressful enough. We will see. My hubby is so upset as this is just stressing me out,and i am not in the clear with this pregnancy yet...i dont understand how people..let alone family can make you feel so horrible when you are trying to do what is best for your family. Thanks again for all your advice:)
Like the other posters said... be firm with both your parents and your sister. This is what works for YOUR family. If your sister dares to suggest teh part time job thing again ask her why she feels she can dictate how your family spend it's resources (time/money). You are coming to the wedding but if her rude behavior continues you will reconsider.