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UGHHHHH!!!
So MIL is here being awesome helping out while Lily and I are both sick.
However, she was just reading a book that my pedi let me borrow to get ideas of exercises to do with Lily, and she said, "You know, this book says your baby should be on the floor for 50% of their awake time." I was like, "That seems excessive considering Lily spends at least an hour in her high chair eating, another hour and a half nursing, probably another half hour getting her diaper changed, about 45 minutes in the car, another 30 minutes in her stroller, maybe 30 minutes being worn in the baby carrier, etc."
And then MIL was like "Well, she probably needs to spend more time on the floor. SIL makes V spend a lot of time on the floor. That's why V is doing well." And she kept going on and on about how V can do this and Lily can't and how it's because SIL makes her spend time on the floor. I told her that her pedi said she is fine and that I do MORE than what her pedi recommends (I do at least 2-3 10 minute tummy time sessions a day) and that Lily HATES tummy time. And MIL was like "Well, SIL does more. And she does it even though V hates it. V could do XYZ when she was Lily's age. Lily's arms are weak. You know you can do PT instead of waiting. This book says a good doctor will recommend PT instead of telling you to keep waiting and waiting."
It was all I could do to not scream "Well, I guess SIL is just the perfect mom compared to me, isn't she???" Instead I said, "I really don't like this comparing V and Lily. They are different babies. V excels at gross motor. Lily has better fine motor than V because that's what she excels at. Rolling over and crawling are NOT considering true milestones anymore. And crawling is a 10 month milestone anyway." And she said, "Hummmph. Well, at school they ask when they rolled and crawled, because if they were behind it's a concern." I told her it's a concern if they are delayed across the board, but Lily can sit and stand just fine, so we aren't worried. And again, she was like "Hummph. Well, I just worry. SIL puts toys all around V to make her do floor time. Her arms are weak. When you hold her under the arms they go up a little, they aren't strong. V wasn't like that at Lily's age."
Re: UGHHHHH!!!
I honestly don't know how you haven't slapped this woman yet! My filter is so far in the OFF position it isn't even funny. I have said so many things to my MIL lately that I usually bite my tongue about. Your MIL is a looney bin! And I would've told her to shove it by now! Good luck, sweetie!
It is rediculous that she would sit there and not only pass judgement on your parenting skills, but also draw comparisons between your child and another- EVERY CHILD IS DIFFERENT!!! I'm not even a mama yet, and this makes my blood boil. You should be considered for sainthood for your ability to maintain your cool and not lash out at her and her nit picking, I'm not sure I would have the same composure in your situation.
Seriously, I'm making a "Bat Sh!t MIL Island", and we will can all send poorly behaved MILs there for shock-therapy and behavior modification when they act a fool. Hang in there!
The aim of life is to live, and to live means to be aware; joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware. -Henry Miller
http://cookthehumbletable.blogspot.com/
OMG God bless you! I would have blown a gasket. I do love that you said, I don't like this comparing, they are different. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to get her to shut up.
I HATE comparing. I really do. I'm nervous that I (and everyone else) will compare baby #2 to baby #1 and so I keep focusing that they are different.
This is temporary, you will feel better soon and she will leave. My heart goes out to you though. My MIL slept over 2 nights last week and I hardly made it. I can't imagine.
Wow, that sounds like a frustrating situation. Of course, having had no children yet, I don't have much else to contribute. I guess, at least, it seems your MIL will be leaving eventually? You seem to be handling it extremely well - I do NOT have that much tact.
Regardless, your daughter is stinkin' cute!
I would be frustrated too. Every baby is different and Bryce didn't get as much tummy time as he should have - since he screamed as loud as he could every time I tried. He is still hitting all of his milestones and his Pedi isn't concerned. Has your DH talked to her at all? Maybe she will listen to him?
If you get an island - let me know :-).
This!
T spends A LOT of time on the floor and she isn't crawling with her tummy off the floor, nor is she pulling up, standing on her own or even close to walking. SO, just because they spend time on the floor DOESN'T mean squat sh!t.
ok...done now
Wow. I don't understand her need to keep harping. Let it go already.