October 2010 Weddings
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I know a lot of girls on here are TTC (or PG, congrats again:O) but also that a lot aren't TTC. So, care to share on how you/DH decided either way?
Re: Deciding to TTC/not to
That just made me snort out loud at my desk. Thank god no one was around.
We're not getting any younger, it's never going to be the perfect time/situation, we have an awesome support system...
We were going to start TTC this summer but first we want a larger place. Coming to the realization that we aren't in a position to buy right now (no DP) and the lack of 3 bedroom options, we decided to hold off until next year when we will be able to buy *hopefully*
Besides housing, there were a few other deterants....1. my school is constantly on the brink of closing so that uncertainty isn't good. Stress is high. 2. My sister is getting married March 2012 and I am the MOH....there will be alot going on and I want to make sure I can truly devote all my energy to her like she did to me. Plus the stress of a BM dress and being pregnant is not something I care to tackle (superficial reason I know)
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TTC Since January 2011 - We have bad spermBlog Sale
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Our faith in God is the most important thing in our lives. We truly believe that God won't give us more than we can handle and if we stay faithful to Him, that he will continue to bless us. Everything that has happened to us thus far has happened at the perfect time and that timeline has been HIS, not ours. He knows the desires of our hearts and has a perfect plan for us and our family.
est. 10/10/10
Xoxp made me lol.
We are waiting so we can try to figure out finances and such, but we are close to being ready. Though hearing about Shasta and my cousin's 1st tri sicknesses makes me a bit nervous, though I know its part of the deal for a lot of pregnancies.
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Did you ever read my response to your housing vent? It has something you might want to look into within it regarding having no down payment.
LOVE IT!
for DH and I its a matter of the fact that we're in debt, him more than me in regards to paying it off (i have a college loan and one credit card, he has college loans and a mess of CC's), I'm only making 13/hr (before i hopefully land this interview i went on wednesday) we live in a tiny apartment and dh has a medical condition besides im not where i want to be physically either...
that being said....if i saw "pregnant" on a test....i'd be happy.....there's no perfect time...and we've got hurdles between my weight and his medical condition.....:( i'd welcome a child...unlike my mother when i was sick for a week and tested thats how bad it was.....when i got the BFN she was like "well thank GOD" i was SO mad at her....:(
I want a baby.....nothing's ever easy
Getting fit for IVF!
We wanted a little time to just be married to each other, but I am already 31 so we can't wait forever. Our decision is based on a road construction project. They are building new highway between our house and where I work that could cut off up to 15 minutes each way off my daily commute (currently 1 hour). I figure those extra 15 minutes could be a big deal come baby time, so we are going to start TTC next April (the road is supposed to be done in the summer).
Crazy reason I know, but to each his own!
Me and DH are still young. We figured we can take our time and enjoy being married first. Now that we've settled down and bought a house we talked it over and decided we'd probably start TTC next year.
If I get K/U before then, then it's whatever. We wont freak out about it and we'd both be happy.
Oceanhutt- My mom wants grand babies SO bad. A few months before the wedding I was "late", felt sick blah blah blah (probably from stress). But her response was "OMG maybe you're pregnant!!! That'd be great, we can just get this wedding thing out of the way and move onto babies."
HAHA i mean yes she wants grandkids....but she i guess doesnt "deem this a good time in our lives yet or a positive environment for a baby" because im not a guidance counselor and jeremy's job was so shaky" says the hypocrite who was prego with my brother before they were married and living together......just saying....
Getting fit for IVF!
I'm pretty much ready... I would want to go and try tonight.
Scot however, isn't ready yet. But he really wants kids, just not this year, so we're waiting like a year and half. He's excited just to spend a year being married
We've got a great starter home that would be good for one baby, at most two young ones (we'd need to move shortly after). But we're going to use the next year to pay off our credit card debt that we've had on our shoulders for too long, work on some home improvements and get some amazing world travel in.
Missing our little turkey.
Estimated Due Date 11/13/12 | Natural Miscarriage 4/17/12
We would be ready today, but we're going on our full length honeymoon this summer and DH is concerned that I'll be morning sick on the cruise and the doctor told us to wait 3 months after going off birth control to balance my hormones, so we have one more month on the pill...
This weekend SIL told MIL that I was pregnant and MIL came out to the kitchen to ask me...then today I was having digestive issues too late to call off work and in faculty meeting I said to another teacher that I was attached to the toilet, right away well maybe you're pregnant...um no wrong issue! Then the genius says well what would you do if you were? Uh I think I'd go to the doctor's and eventually in 9 months have a kid...
Our decision wasn't quite so simple. Without getting into a lot of drama, let's just say that there was a time, many years ago, when I thought having my tubes tied was a great idea, and within the past 2-3 years, I've become less than convinced of that. Too bad I already had them done the day after I had my now-14 year old son.
DH and I have discussed this over and over again. We are foster parents to one child who is now 18, but adoption, after praying about it and discussing it, just doesn't seem like the right fit for us. We made the decision to have my tubal reversed, and, if that doesn't result in a pregnancy within 6 months post-surgery, we will pursue IVF (In Vitro). We are taking this first year of our marriage to just enjoy being married without TTC, while I lose some weight that I would like to take off before the surgery, and to put some more money into our bank account in case we need more cycles of IVF than we had originally planned.
I'm not saying this is the way for everyone...I'm fully aware that some will side-eye me for not choosing adoption, and still others will have issues with the fact that I will be 38 years old when my tubes are reversed, most likely 39 or even (horrors!) 40 when I give birth. There's probably even another camp that thinks I should just sit around and wait to become a grandma (biologically...I'm already step-grandma to 3 kids), being as my youngest child is almost 15. I'm also sure many of those people and even others who had no issues with the previous concepts would take issue with the fact that DH will be pushing 60 if not over 60 when our child(ren) is(are) born. Maybe some of them will have a problem with the fact that one of my children is already a "special needs kid" (she's Deaf), and therefore they think that I shouldn't risk it with another kid, being as Down's Syndrome becomes more of a concern at my age. (The people in that last group, by the way, are cordially invited to f**k right off, no further explanation required or offered.) To all of those people, I say thanks for your concern, but this is a private and personal decision, made with no small amount of consideration and forethought, and we have determined that we can handle whatever outcome may result. We didn't consult anyone else because it wasn't their business. Simple as that.
Laura I will go back and check it out...the post got lost in the pages when I wasn't on that much. Thanks in advance.
I love some of the answers in here!!! Made me crack up :-)
We're currently living in a 1 bed/1 back condo (with a loft up a spiral staircase) that DH bought when he was 22... not quite the right place for starting a family.
If all went according to The Will Of Kenna, this would be the sequence of events:
1. Buy a 4-5 bedroom house (2 bedrooms for the kids, 1-2 bedrooms for home offices - mine and his, as I work out of home, and he likes to stay home some days) in 6-8 months
2. Get a puppy (I really want a Doberman; also not practical in a 1 bed/1 bath condo) (10-12 months)
3. Start TTC (15 months)
I'm turning 31 next month (DH is turning 30 next month), so I don't want to wait too much longer, but we probably need to save more before buying, which will push everything back a bit.
THIS!!!!
I told my MIL when she asked me to volunteer counsel at the church camp, "You know I don't really DO the God thing, right?" And I still have beef with God, but I've definitely come long strides, and the thing I really like about it is they say 'wherever you are in your faith, there's a place for you here.'
Long story short (too late), I love the way you said this. It's really just beautiful. And it resonated with me, the part about His time. I had a meltdown at camp during a particularly emotional discussion about how I'm scared I'm not going to graduate before my mom dies (Stage IV breast cancer, though she's doing amazingly well), and that I'll never forgive myself for it. One of the other counselors told me that it would happen in God's time. And (I'm getting teary, I'm so lame) it just really stuck with me, and eased some of the stress.
But back to the original topic, I think we should go off BC, and if it happens, it happens, but H isn't ready. I feel like there's no "right" time, and you're never "ready." I'm 28 and H will be 30 this summer. As my 3yo niece told me this summer (after asking when we were going have have a baby), "Auntie Jena, you're getting older." Awesome. Thanks for reminding me kid! So I'm going to give it another 6 months or so, and revisit the topic. Until then (though I got flamed for it on TK), I'll just hope the BC fails - because then it's God's "fault" not mine.
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So did I ever mention that on our first Valentine's Day together I found out that DH's friends had nicknamed me "Old Eggs," - as in my eggs are getting old, so what was DH going to do about this? Wow.
Brooke, I don't think I could have said it any better. I am 34 and Felix is 38. Neither of us is getting any younger, but neither are we in any hurry to have children (though our recent puppy adoption seems to lead some people to believe that we're "preparing" ourselves for that). We decided to just enjoy being married--neither trying to conceive nor hinder pregnancy. He will do what He will do, and in that we have peace. :-)
IMO there is no "perfect time" to have a baby, if you wait until you can afford it, you will never do it, but that's just my opinion.
We were able to pay off all of our CC debt in November after the wedding with money I received as settlement from an accident. The only "debt" we have is non interest bearing debt, our house, and one car (I paid the other one off). So now is as good a time as any. Although I am thinking that I will be a BM in my BFF's October wedding and if I am PG now I will be ginormous.
I am not going to plan our life around other people's events so to me, now was as a good a time as any other.